Fool for You
by CaliGirlMon
Summary: Best friends. A boy lost in his addiction, a girl lost to her heart, losing themselves along the way, in time they find themselves on a journey back to each other. AH - BPOV - Tattward
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing and beautiful Beta, cutestkidsmom, my wonderful pre-readers Shenaniwhatagans and ILoveFanFiction74, for taking the time and helping me make this pretty for you all.**

**_*Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go thru, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, some of the content is true to my life. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!*_**

* * *

Chapter one:

March 2013

Walking along the streets of Downtown Chula Vista, feeling tired and a little discouraged on how the day has gone. She's been in a million stores it seems like, applying just about anywhere for just about anything as long as it's a job. She notices there's a sign on the window of the local cafe, they're looking for local talent to perform during their evening rush hour. Taking a deep breath, she decides to walk in and apply. She needs a job and she was an okay singer. What's the worst that can happen, they turn her down?  
Walking into the cafe, she spots a guy around her age behind the counter.

"Um, excuse me, I noticed the sign on the window; are you still looking for someone?"

A dark haired, brown eyed boy turns around. She notices he's staring a little longer than normal. "Oh, uh yea, I think they are? Hold on a sec," he says with a smile.

"I'm Jacob, by the way." He holds out his hand towards her.  
She smiles up at him. "Hi Jacob, I'm Bella".  
"Well, Bella, let me go call the manager for you, have a seat." He motions towards a bar stool.

Taking a look around before sitting down she notices that it's a nice little cafe, very homey. Could she perform in a place like this? She wonders how many people come in to watch the performers. Looking around at the warm casual place she can't help wondering what they would pay her. She notices out of the corner of her eye that Jacob is walking back into the bar, which brings her out of her thoughts. Behind him is a beautiful five foot, dark haired woman. Brushing a hand down her hair and adjusting her shirt she sits up a little straighter.

"Hi, Bella, is it?" says the dark haired beauty.  
"Yes Hi, Bella Swan."

"I'm Alice Brandon, manager of Just Java," she says, sticking out her hand towards Bella. "Jake here says you're inquiring about the sign on the window."

"Yea, um, are you guys still looking for someone?"  
Alice looks at Bella with a huge smile on her face. "Actually you're in luck, we still have one spot to fill. Can you sing or do you play an instrument?"

"I can play the guitar, and I've been told I can carry a tune," Bella says laughing through her nose.

"Awesome, I have a great feeling about you, why don't you come back this afternoon around 5pm and we'll give it a trial run?" Alice giggles, while bouncing on her feet. "If the crowd likes you, and you're comfortable, then you have yourself a job"

"Really? That's wonderful, I'll be here at 4:30. Wow thanks, Alice, I really appreciate it, I need this job," Bella says while stepping off the stool.  
"No problem, Bella, thanks for coming in, you wouldn't believe how hard it is to find decent performers around here. I'll see you at 4:30 then for setup?"

"Yes, I'll be back at 4:30," Bella says as she walks towards the door.  
"Bye, Bella, I'll see ya later," Jake calls out to her.  
"Oh yea- bye, Jake, I'll see ya," Bella says over her shoulder with a chuckle.

*FFY*

* * *

**AN:  
So here it is my first story ever! I going for a drabble type of Fic, but some chapters might be longer than others. As I had stated up top, parts of this fic is true to my life, Just Java is a coffee shop in downtown Chula Vista. Thank you to all who are reading this, I am humbled. I hope to update at least twice a week, but we'll see how that goes, RL and all. Thanks again, hope to see you all next time! **

**_*I will be posting the banner to the story in my FB Group, Twi~FanFiction Banners. I'll be posting teaser pic's there as well.*_**

**Rec Time:**

**_Salacious by cutestkidsmom_****~ Flove this story, it's suspense, drama, love and a HOT POSSESIVEWARD! What more can a girl ask for! **

**_Summary reads_****: In a world where money is power, and power is everything, Edward must stay true to the society he was raised in to, and stay true to its values. Laid back Bella is the object of his affection, and he will stop at nothing to have her, What is your life worth? Would you hand it over to a beautiful stranger for money?**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing and beautiful Beta, cutestkidsmom, my wonderful pre-readers Shenaniwhatagans and ILoveFanFiction74, for taking the time and helping me make this all pretty for you all. **

******_*Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go thru there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, some of the content is true to my life. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!*_**

* * *

_~This is a short Chapter, I figured I'd post Chapter two today, and next week I'll start my schedule of posting on Mondays and Fridays~_

Chapter two:

"Thank God," Bella says to herself. She hates living with her parents without having a job, now at least that isn't the case... She just recently moved back in with her mom and dad, and although they have not asked or discussed her paying rent, she wants to be prepared, in case they do. Pulling into the driveway, she notices her younger sister Tanya is home.

"Hey what's up" Tanya says looking up at Bella. "Where'd you go?"

"I went to fill some job applications." Bella says while walking into the kitchen and hanging up her keys.

"Oh, how did it go?"

"It went good I think? I saw a sign in the window of Just Java on Third Ave. and E. St, they were looking for someone to perform in the evenings during their rush hour. I spoke with the manager, told her I could play and sing." Bella says with a shrug.

"You did?" Tanya says looking shocked. "You've never played in front of an audience before, you think you'll be able to do it?"

"I don't know, I'm sure I'll be nervous, but it was the only place that offered me something on the spot. Guess I'll find out tonight if I choke or not. Alice, the manager asked me to come back tonight at 5 for a trial run."

"Oh crap, so you're really going to do it?" Tanya tips her head back and laughs.

"I need a job Tan, I have to give it a try." Bella frowns getting up from the couch. "Oh and before you ask me, no you can't come!" Bella says sticking out her tongue at her sister.

Bella goes into her room for the next couple of hours, picking out an outfit for tonight and getting her guitar in tune. She gets into the shower about 3pm, just to make sure she has plenty of time to get ready and get to the cafe on time. She dresses in some dark blue skinny jeans, a white baby doll T, and her favorite black high-top Chucks. Her hair is swept into a sideways waterfall braid and she puts on some light makeup; a touch of pearl eye shadow, mascara, bronzer and pink shiny lip gloss. While gathering her purse and guitar case, her bedroom door opens.

"Hi sweetie, your sister said you found a job?"

"Hi, Mama, yea I did, at a Cafe in downtown Chula Vista, they were looking for someone to perform in the evenings, I'm heading there now for a trial run." Bella says heading toward her bedroom door.

"Oh that sounds like fun! But, Bella, you know you don't have to work right? Neither Daddy nor I expect anything out of you."

"I know, Mama," Bella says with a sigh. "I just can't move back in after living on my own for a year and expect for you and dad to pay my way, especially right now. It'll be good for me, Mom, help distract me, I can't just be bottled up inside the house, hearing and watching him next door." Bella says in a whisper.

Renee could see the unshed tears her daughter had in her eyes and the battle she had going on inside herself to stay strong and not give up.  
Renee hesitates but then exhales and says, "Okay honey, please drive carefully, what time will you be home?"

"Um, I'm not sure, I probably will only play a song or two, so not too late," Bella says walking out the door.

"Good luck"

*FFY*

* * *

**AN:  
Thank you all for sticking with me, I hope your enjoying my little tale so far? Let me know whatcha think. See ya next time!**

**Rec Time:  
****_Till You Love Me by Edwardforever2 _****~ Great story, beautiful love story! Love this Edward. **

**Summary reads: Edward Cullen is a successful and wealthy attorney who wants for nothing, that is until he sets out to win the friendship and love of inmate Bella Swan who coming from humble beginnings, sees the world through very different eyes. While he embarks on this mission to get into her head and heart, he doesn't realize that he in fact is the one being transformed from the inside out**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing and beautiful Beta, cutestkidsmom, my wonderful pre-readers Shenaniwhatagans and ILoveFanFiction74, for taking the time and helping me make this pretty for you all. **

******_*Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, and some of the content is true to my life. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!*_**

* * *

_Thank you to all my beautiful readers who have reviewed and added my little tale to your favorites. I am in awe with the response I have recieved. Love you all_

_~I got a question regarding where Chula Vista is located. I'm sorry I didn't make that clear in the first chapter. Chula Vista,Ca is located in the County of San Diego~ _

_Posting early for a beautiful woman, here ya go Edwardforever2, this chapter is longer than normal, but I didn't want to break it up. _

* * *

Chapter three:

Walking into Just Java, Bella comes to a halt as she notices all the people that have filled the little cafe. "Shit, there's a lot of people in here," Bella mumbles under her breath.

"Bella, Bella over here." Looking in the direction the voice came from, Bella see's Jake motioning for her to come over to the bar.

"Hey, Jake, um, this is a lot of people." Bella says nervously.

"Yea, we get a pretty good crowd during the week, all the locals in the area usually come in for dinner and the live entertainment," he informs her. "Why do you look like you want to throw up? You aren't nervous are you?" he asks meeting her eyes, shooting her a smirk.

"Well being that this will be my first time performing in public, yea I'm pretty freaking nervous"

"Wha..." Jacob is about to ask, but Alice interrupts them.

"Bella, you made it, thank God!" Alice says coming up to Bella. "You ready? Let's take your personal belongings to the employee break room and then we can get you setup."

"Okay," Bella gives Jake a worried look.

"Good luck, Bella, see ya on the other side," Jake gives her a wink.

Walking into the employee break room, Bella locks up her purse in the locker Alice assigned her, takes a deep breath, grabs her guitar and walks back out. Stepping onto the stage, she hears, "Good Evening everyone, for all our newcomers, I'm Alice, the manager of this fine establishment, thanks for joining us tonight. We have a new performer this evening, her name is Bella Swan. Let's give her a warm welcome, enjoy your dinner and the entertainment."

Bella adjusts the mic and scoots up the stool. Sitting down bringing her guitar to her lap, she strums a few cords. Looking into the audience. "Hi everyone, I'm Bella... umm... I'll be performing a few songs for you all this evening," her voice cracking a little, she clears her throat. "Sorry, I'm a little nervous, I hope you all enjoy yourselves and I don't ruin your meals," Bella says with a nervous laugh. Staring down at the placement of her fingers, she starts to strum and slap on the neck of her guitar as she begins to sing the lyrics of her first song.

_Saying I love you  
Is not the words I want to hear from you  
It's not that I want you  
Not to say, but if you only knew  
How easy it would be to show me how you feel  
More than words is all you have to do to make it real  
Then you wouldn't have to say that you love me  
Cos I'd already know  
What would you do if my heart was torn in two  
More than words to show you feel  
That your love for me is real  
What would you say if I took those words away  
Then you couldn't make things new  
Just by saying I love you  
More than words_

Bella doesn't have the best voice in the world, but it's beautiful nonetheless, soulful and raspy. Closing her eyes, Bella feels all the emotion this song brings forward, taking a deep breath she continues;

_Now I've tried to talk to you and make you understand  
All you have to do is close your eyes  
And just reach out your hands and touch me  
Hold me close don't ever let me go  
More than words is all I ever needed you to show  
Then you wouldn't have to say that you love me  
Cos I'd already know  
What would you do if my heart was torn in two  
More than words to show you feel  
That your love for me is real  
What would you say if I took those words away  
Then you couldn't make things new  
Just by saying I love you_

As she finishes the last cords of the song, she opens up her eyes and looks out into the crowd, they all have smiles on their faces, scanning the crowd she spots Alice and Jake, both giving her thumbs up and fist pumps in the air. She releases a breath she had no idea she was holding. Feeling herself relax, she continues on with the last two songs she had prepared.

The night was amazing, she was so excited and thrilled that the crowd had loved her, she hadn't been this happy in a long time. Thanking everyone before walking off the stage, she meets Alice in the break room.

"Oh My Gosh, Bella! You were amazing, your voice is just...WOW, it's beautiful," Alice is squealing. "Okay, so you are definitely hired, please say you'll come back?"

"Yes, I'll come back," Bella answers with a giggle. "I'm a little stunned right now, I can't believe I didn't make a fool out of myself, they really liked me, didn't they?"

Bella can't believe she did it; she's always had a love for music, after all her guitar was her first love. Whenever she wanted to get away from the world she would find solace in her guitar. It was something she did just for herself, although on occasion she would play for her family and she always loved playing for him... Bella felt her throat tighten and a knot form in the pit of her stomach just thinking about him and what had been. She quickly pushed those thoughts away, as she hears Alice calling her name.

"Bella? Hey are you alright, you don't look so good?" Alice asks with concern in her eyes.

Clearing her throat "Um... yea fine Alice, I'm okay, just replaying tonight in my head."

Not quite believing her, but not wanting to push the issue, Alice informs Bella about her schedule. She wants her to perform 2-3 hours 4 days a week, Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday and Saturdays. Bella agrees to the schedule and finally asks about the pay. Alice lets her know it will be $300 a week, plus whatever tips the patrons leave her. She asks Bella to arrive about an hour or so early the next time she comes into work, to fill out all her paperwork to get her on the payroll.

"Alright, I'll see you Tuesday then ,Alice, thank you once again for this opportunity. I really needed this job," Bella states as she starts to head out the door.

With a wave of her hand and a shake to her head, "Oh hush, I didn't do anything really, it was all you and that beautiful voice of yours. You made the decision extremely easy for me," Alice says. "Go on home, it's getting late, I'll see you on Tuesday."

Bella smiles and nods her head in agreement as she shuts the door to the break room. She heads out through the back entrance with a smile on her face. Walking out into the cool night air, she breathes a sigh of relief, placing a hand on her stomach, "We did it little one, we found a job, one step closer in the right direction."

*FFY*

* * *

**AN:  
Okay, so there you have chapter three. I hope you all enjoyed Bella's debut at the cafe. Thanks for sticking around, see ya next time!**

**Rec Time:**

**_The Gentlemen - Book 1 by MasterAskim_**

**Love Love Love this fic! Its suspenseful and HOT! Garrett is super hot in this story, and there's tattoos! HOT Men and tattoos what else is there to say, GO GO GO Read!**

**Summary reads;**

**Bella Dwyer was an average girl until tragedy strikes and her life is turned upside-down by the mysterious organization known only as "The Gentlemen". Bella must learn to navigate the web of intrigue these power-brokers weave around her and decide once and for all who she can trust before time runs out for her and her new allies. Rated M for language and violence.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, cutestkidsmom, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

Chapter four:

_September 2005_

Bella was eleven years old when her father accepted the Chief of Police position with the Chula Vista PD. Chula Vista was a quaint little town in San Diego, just about a 2 hour drive south from Los Angeles where the Swans had lived all their lives. Even though it wasn't a long distance, Bella wasn't happy about leaving her friends. In fact, none of the Swan children were pleased with the move. They'd all be starting over. Mike would be entering high school in the fall while Tanya was heading to 5th grade, and Bella was starting 6th grade.

All the Swan children were nervous about being the new kids on the block and in school, but at least the girls had each other. Getting settled into their new home and neighborhood, Renee quickly applied at the local School District, hoping to pick up part-time work and be available when the kids get home from school.

Today was the start of the school year; the kids hadn't made any friends in the neighborhood during the single week that they lived in Chula Vista. "I'm so excited, Bella, hopefully we can make some friends today, Oh, maybe even meet some kids that live on our block," Tanya said enthusiastically.

"Mmhmm that would be cool," Bella mumbled through spoonful of cereal.

Coming into the kitchen, Renee placed her cup of coffee in the sink. "Girls are you ready? We still need to drop off Mike at the high school, we need to leave a little earlier."

"Yeah, Mom, we're ready," both girls answered.

They all wished Mike good luck as they dropped him off at school. The eldest of the Swan girl's had never been a very outgoing or social child; always tended to keep to herself. Bella fidgeted in the back seat. Needless to say she was than her sister, Bella didn't know anyone at the new school. There were friends back home, but she'd known them since kindergarten. All this meant that Bella had to put effort into talking and getting to know the kids in her class.

Letting out a long sigh, she unbuckled her seatbelt and got out of the car.

"Let's go girls, I have to check you into the office to find out what classes you guys will be in," Renee said walking onto the school grounds.

"What's wrong?" Tanya whispered.

"Just a little nervous," Bella said with a sigh.

"It's gonna be fun Bella, we get to meet new kids!"

"For you it is! You like being the center of attention," Bella scoffed.

Getting their classroom numbers, Renee walked Bella to class first. Her class was the closest to the office. Walking in, Bella, Tanya and Renee stood at the back of the classroom. The teacher noticed them and stopped taking attendance. "Good Morning, you must be our new student?"

"Yes, this is Isabella Swan. We just moved here from LA," Renee said with a smile and a slight push to Bella's back.

"Well, welcome, Isabella. I'm Mrs. Piper and I'll be your teacher this year." Mrs. Piper greeted Bella with a warm smile, "Thank you, Mrs. Swan, I can take it from here. She'll be just fine." Looking at Bella, nodded her head in reassurance.

"Have a good day, sweetheart." Renee placed a kiss on Bella's cheek.

Hearing her sister giggle, Bella felt her cheeks heat with embarrassment. Tanya would never let her live this down.

"Bye, Ma." Bella mumbled.

Bella watched her mother leave through the door. Turning around, she blushed even more when she noticed all the kids in class were looking at her.

"Isabella let's get you a desk. Why don't you take that empty desk right there, Edward raise your hand please."

Looking at where Mrs. Piper was pointing, Bella noticed the back of a head with reddish brown hair and locks that were all over the place. Raising his hand as he turned, Edward looked at Bella and the apple of his cheeks turned bright red along with the tips of his ears.

"Isabella, I'm going to be calling out everyone's name, you either raise your hand or say, "here" so I can mark you in attendance. If there is another name you prefer to go by, now would be the time to tell me. Well class," with a huge smile she looked at all her students. 's enthusiasm was visible on her face, "let's get our day started."

Sitting down as the teacher continued with the roll call, "Hi I'm Bella," she whispered to Edward without looking at him.

"Hi, Bella, from LA. I'm Edward," he said with a smile playing at his lips.

Turning to face him, Bella giggled and noticed his eyes were a deep emerald green, she had never seen eyes that color before.

*FFY*

* * *

**AN:**

**So I will be jumping from the then and now in the chapters that come to give you all the backstory. Montgomery Elementary is the Elementary school I went to in Chula Vista, and Mrs. Piper was my sixth grade teacher. So the whole intro to 6th grade is true, my mom says, Hi this is Monica from LA, *facepalm* then I get seated next to the hubs, which he blushes like a fool, I say Hi to him and he says, Hi Monica from LA! He teased me about that for ages! Thank you for sticking with me! See ya next time.**

_**Rec Time:**_

**Under my Skin by Missjude~**

**Edward is an artist, his family is the most important thing in his life. Bella is hiding behind her books, she doesn't have much of a family and is in a bad relationship. Both of their lives will take a new direction where they will face both good and bad.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing and beautiful Beta, cutestkidsmom, my wonderful pre-readers Shenaniwhatagans and ILoveFanFiction74, for taking the time and helping me make this pretty for you all. **

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, some of the content is true to my life. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

Chapter five:

_March 5th, 2013_

Waking up to loud boisterous laughs, Bella rolls over and groans. "Crap, who in the hell is that? It's too early," Bella mumbled into her pillow. Opening one eye she looks at her clock on her nightstand and sees it's eight thirty in the morning. Turning over and sitting up slowly, she places her feet flat on the ground and lets out a deep breath. Ever since she became pregnant, getting up too fast from bed makes her woozy.

Looking out her bedroom window, she sees her dad Charlie is talking with Emmett and Mike.

Brushing her teeth, tossing her hair in a bun, she walks out back. "Morning, Bells, how ya feeling?" Charlie asks.

"Morning Dad, I would be much better if I was still asleep," Bella says with a playful smile.

"Morning Em, Mike"

"Morning, how's my favorite girl doing?" Emmett asks wrapping an arm around Bella.

"I'm good, tired but well," hugging Emmett around the waist.

"That's good," Emmett says placing a kiss to her temple. "So, what's this I hear about you getting a job?"

"Who told you? Wait don't tell me, I bet it was my dad, right?" She huffs rolls her eyes.

"Yup, ya know the Chief can't hide anything," he chuckles. "So...about this job?"

"Yea, I got hired last Friday, today is officially my first day. I'll be one of the performers at a Cafe Downtown."

"Wow! You're performing huh? I can't even get you to sing for me, but you'll perform in front of god knows how many strangers."

"Em, I needed a job," she whispers.

"I know Bella, I'm just kidding with you. So... does my brother know you got a job?"

"NO! I haven't spoken to him, besides why would I need to tell him anyway, he made his choice, and that was to stay away." Bella answers in an angry tone.

He places his hands up in surrender, "Just asking, I see pregnancy brings out the 'not so nice' Bella."

"Em! Are you just going to annoy me today?" placing her hands on her hips.

"Nope, I'm out, catchya later," throwing his head back and laughing.

Getting ready for work, Bella gathers all the documents that Alice asked her to bring. She eyes the clock and see's it 2:15, if she leaves now she'll be there by 2:30. That should give her plenty of time to fill out the forms, eat something and set up. Stepping out into the porch, Bella stops dead in her tracks.

"Edward!" She is surprised to see Edward sitting on the bench swing, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. For a quick moment, she takes in his appearance, his hair is all over the place, he's wearing blue cut offs, a black v-neck tee and black Chuck's. She also notices that he has a bandage on his forearm and wonders if he's gotten another tattoo? The second he looks up at her she instantly sees he's high, he has dark purple circles under his eyes, his nostrils are flared and his laugh lines are very prominent. She could always tell with just one look whether or not Edward had used, no matter how hard he tried to hide it, she knew... she knew him better than she knew herself.

"What do you want?" She hisses as she locks the door.

"I haven't seen you in a while, I can't come see you?" Edward speaks in a gritty voice.

"No, you can't, look I have somewhere to be," she's not looking at him; she knows if she looks at him, her resolve will break. She'll just end up crying and become sick.

"I can't... Since when Bella? Huh, since you got a job!" He spits out.

"What... Is that why you came? Emmett went and told you I got a job, so you decide what? That you would come here and make a scene. That you want me miserable and pining away for you here at home? Well you know what YOU'RE RIGHT, you can't come look for me, you lost that privilege the day you chose your drugs over me. The day you chose not to be in this baby's life, the day you dropped me off back here!"

Walking down the stairs and getting into her car, Bella drives away crying, leaving Edward behind, just like he left her a month ago.

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N:**

**Okay so a little more insight into Bella and Edward. What do you all think so far? Are you still with me? Thank you for reading. Hope to see ya'll next time.**

**So...quick question? I was asked if I planned on creating an Author group in FB. Would you all like teaser's or chapter pics?**

**_Rec time:_**

**Love Through Another's Eyes by Eternally Edward's Girl ~**

**Summary reads:  
Edward Masen has lived a life based on love, commitment and respect. Enter Kate Denali who plays by her own rules. Will a brief encounter with a brown eyed girl change Edward's path, leading him to the happily ever after he desires?**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, cutestkidsmom, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

Chapter Six:_  
_

_September 2008_

"Tanya, hurry up we're gonna be late!" Bella yelled to her sister from the living room. It was the first day back to school, and Bella and Edward's first day of high school. Ever since that day back in 6th grade, three years ago, Edward and Bella had become close friends.

The Cullen Boys lived a few houses away from the Swans. Edward and his two brothers; were a force to be reckoned with. The three boys were always out in the street playing football, riding bikes and just getting into trouble. Over time, they became Bella and Tanya's best friends. It was a foregone conclusion that if the Swan Girls were out and about, the Cullen Boys were always close behind. The five of them were inseparable.

Bella and Edward had almost every class together during junior high and they weren't surprised to find out high school to be the same way.

The past year or so, the boys had become a lot closer to the Swans. Their father, Carlisle, left their mother, Elizabeth, after sixteen years of marriage, for a younger woman and moved to Del Mar. The Cullens had been the perfect family to an outsider; Carlisle was a good father and provided a very good life for his son's, he was a well-established lawyer at a prestigious law firm in Downtown San Diego. Elizabeth was a very attentive mother and wife, she was also a Social Worker for San Diego County. They had it all; a live in nanny, nice cars, family vacations. It all came crashing down the day Carlisle walked away.

In the divorce the two homes Carlisle and Elizabeth owned were split amongst them. Elizabeth kept the home the family had been currently living in. She was devastated, but tried to carry on as normal as possible, little by little she began to breakdown, staying away for days at a time and eventually losing her job and then her home.

She started hanging around with her new wild friends and soon began using drugs and was sadly no longer a mother to her sons.

The Cullen Boys and Elizabeth moved into the home next door to the Swans, which was the home Carlisle was awarded in the divorce. He was ordered to maintain the home and allow his sons and their mother to live there until the youngest of the boys turned eighteen.

Renee saw what was happening with Elizabeth and took as much care of the boys as possible, they would come over for dinner, hang out and watch TV on the weekends, and they would always show up in the morning for a ride to school.

Emmett, was fifteen and being the oldest, went to school and also got a construction job on the weekends. He used that money to buy food, clothes and shoes for himself and his brothers. The boys also had their grandmother, Mama Esme,and Aunt Rosalie-Elizabeth's mother and younger sister- who would bring them clean clothes and groceries once a week. Eventually, the boys started hanging out with the 'wrong' crowd and began partying and smoking pot. So, when they walked into the Swan house on the morning of the first day of school, they looked worn down and half asleep.

"Crap you guys look like hell. Did you not get any sleep last night?" Bella scoffed.

"Some..." Edward looked down at his rumpled up shirt "...you guys ready or what?"

"Yeah we're ready," she answered rolling her eyes.

"Alrighty then, let's get this day over with," Emmett hollered as he walked back out.

Their first day of school was over with before they knew it. Bella, Edward and Emmett met just outside the quad area then headed over to the junior high to meet Tanya, Jasper and James, a friend from up the street, so they could walk home together. Passing a pizzeria, Bella stops.

"Hey, you guys hungry? My dad gave me money this morning, come on I'll buy us a slice of pizza each."

"Okay," the children replied in unison.

Soon, a stop for pizza and soda was added to their daily after school routine. One day Bella needed to stay after school to finish up a project; Edward decided to stay with her while the others headed home. When she was done, they stopped for their slice of pizza. Edward looked up and noticed a group of boys huddled around each other. Bella recognized them as eleventh graders; they motioned for Edward to come over.

"Wait here for me."

Why, why can't I come with you?" Bella said with a whine, fearing that Edward was ditching her for an older, rougher crowd.

"Just wait for me here."

"Whatever." Bella scoffed.

She noticed one of the boys was looking at her with a wry smile, a football player named Riley. All the girls were crazy over him. Bella smiled back, blushing from head to toe. "O-M-G, Riley's looking at me, he just smiled at me!" she squealed to herself. Edward's sour looking face sobered Bella immediately. The boys asked him something and he nodded his head in agreement and walked away.

"Come on," he ordered, grabbing a hold of her elbow and dragging Bella along.

"Wait up, Edward, what the hell! What just happened, did they say something to you?"

"No, just leave it alone. Will ya hurry up? I wanna get home!"

Bella wrenched her arm from Edward's grasp and gapes at him, not able to believe he's yelling at her for something...for nothing. Edward stops and turns when he realized that Bella was not with him.

"Can we please just go, Bella?" he asked in an exasperated huff.

Bella hugged her books tightly to her chest and shook her head."Not till you tell me what happened?"

"It doesn't matter, I set them straight. Now can we please just keep walking?"

"You set them straight…about what? Edward, just tell me. What aren't you telling me? Are you in trouble with them? Do you owe them something?" she questioned as she caught up to him.

"No, I don't owe those douche bags a damn thing." He turned around and continued walking.

"Then what? You know if you don't tell me I'm just going to bug you to death about it." Bella playfully informed him.

"God you're so stubborn, why can't you just drop it?"

Bella hit Edward with questioning eyebrows followed by her irresistible pout, and watched gleefully as her best friend caved.

"Low blow, Swan, you brought out the big guns," Edward said, chuckling in frustration. "Fine, you want to know what they asked. They asked if you were my girlfriend, because Riley wanted a chance at you."

"What! No they didn't, you're lying, why would Riley want to date me? O-M-G Riley Biers, are you kidding me, Edward, what did you say?"

"Are you serious with this smile?" Edward sharply answered, pointing at her angrily.

"What did you tell them?" Bella looked into his eyes. He doesn't have to answer because she already knows.

"I told them yes, that you were my girlfriend and that if I caught any one of them talking to you I would kick their ass."

"What! Bu..but, why? Why would you do that? It's not true! Now they all think we're dating!" Bella yelled as she pushed past him and stomped her way up the street.

Edward chased after her and shouted, "Bella wait, those guys aren't good for you, they only want one thing and it sure isn't to be your boyfriend. You're my best friend and I don't want you to get hurt. So what if they think you're my girlfriend, it'll keep them away."

"But we're not Edward! That's what's wrong."

"Okay look I'm sorry. I won't do it again, but I'm not sorry for trying to protect you from those idiots."

"Fine, whatever, let's just get home."

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N:**

**The hubs really did this to me, LMAO. I remember being so pissed at him. So there you have a little more into Bella and Edward's friendship. Hope you all enjoyed the chapter. Thanks again for reading. Hope to see you all next time!**

**I have created a group on FB, well I technically merged my Banner group with my Author Group. It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners, I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there.**

** groups/469619903102273/**

_**Rec time:**_

**A Sort of Fairy Tale by Staceleo ~ I usually do NOT read AU or Horror and this is both, but I got sucked in since chapter one! It's an amazing story, nail biting amazing! Hurry up and go read before Edward sucks your blood! ;)**

**Summary reads: A pampered prince in need of redemption. A bitter maiden in search of long lost passion. Can forgiveness and love lead to happily ever after? A modern day fairy tale. AU. Romance/Drama/Horror**


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing and beautiful Beta, cutestkidsmom, my wonderful pre readers Shenaniwhatagans and ILoveFanFiction74, for taking the time and helping me make this pretty for you all.**

**_*Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!*_**

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

Chapter seven:

Pulling into the parking lot of the cafe, Bella shuts her car off and places her face in her hands, letting the sobs she was holding in go. She knew seeing him again this soon wasn't going to be good for her. "Ok...ay...O...kay, get a ho..hold of yourself Bella." she tells herself.

She sits in her car for about fifteen minutes, trying to gather her composure before walking into the Cafe. Looking into her rearview mirror she pats under her eyes. She doesn't want to deflect any questions or smile and nod at people who ask her if she is okay. Pulling out her face powder, she re-applies her makeup covering up her tear stained cheeks and adds some more lip gloss to her lips.

Walking into the Cafe, she see's Jacob drying some coffee mugs behind the counter.

"Hi Jake," she greets him.

"Hey Bella, what's up?" he answers her with a smile. "You're early, you're not due for another hour and a half." he says looking at his watch.

"Yea, Alice asked me to come in early to get some documents signed. Is she here?"

"She's in her office, I'll let her know you're here. Would you like something to drink?"

"Sure, an iced tea would be great, umm.. do you serve iced tea? being that this is a coffee-house and all. If you don't ice water will be fine." Bella huffs out.

"Yup, we have iced tea." Jacob looks at her and laughs.

Sipping her tea while Jacob walk out back to get Alice, she gets lost in her thoughts concerning Edward. She is so angry with him, but more than anything she is extremely hurt. She loves Edward, and is in love with him, and even after all he's put her through, she can't get him out of her heart.

How do you stop loving someone you've loved for eight years. Sighing heavily, she focuses her attention elsewhere, when she hears Jacob and Alice walking down the hall.

"Bella, how are you?" Alice greets her with a hug.

"Um...I'm good, Alice, and you?," Bella says awkwardly, the hug catching her off guard.

"I'm very well, thank you. Thanks for coming in early, let's go get that paperwork filled out."

With all the paperwork done and having had something to eat, Bella begins to get ready for her performance. Little by little the cafe began getting crowded. Bella starts to feel her palms sweat and her heart flutter with nerves. Saying a silent prayer, she walks up on stage.

"Good Evening everyone, not sure how many of you might have been here a few days ago, so I'll introduce myself. My name is Bella and I'll be performing for you all this evening."

Picking up her guitar, she begins to play her first song of the evening. After about an hour and a half and several requests from the audience, Bella takes a quick five minute break to drink some water. As she walks to the bar, the patrons she passes all give her words of encouragement letting her know how much they are enjoying her performance.

"Jake can I get a glass of ice water please?"

"Sure thing, Bella, coming right up. You're really good, awesome actually. I can't believe you've never performed before?" He hands her the water.

"Thanks, Jake, I've always just done it for fun; playing for family and friends." She shrugs. "I better get back, I have one more song planned, thanks for the water." she tells him.

"Alright, I hope you all are enjoying yourself so far?" Bella asks looking into the audience. "I have one more song planned for tonight, so here we go."

Taking a deep breath she begins to sing the words to her last song.

_Another shot of whiskey please bartender  
Keep it coming til I don't remember at all  
How bad it hurts when you're gone (no no no no)_

_Turn the music up a little bit louder  
Just gotta get past the midnight hour (uh huh)  
Maybe tomorrow it won't be this hard_

_Who am I kidding?  
I know what I'm missing_

_Oh, I had my heart set on you  
But nothing else hurts like you do  
Who knew that love was so cruel (yeah, yeah, yeah)  
And I waited and waited so long  
For someone who'll never come home  
It's my fault to think you'd be true (yeah, yeah)  
I'm just a fool  
(Yeah)  
I say that I don't care  
And walk away whatever  
And I tell myself we were bad together (uh huh)  
But that's just me trying to move on without you_

Bella can feel her throat closing, tears threatening the corners of her eyes. What in the hell was she thinking when she picked this song, she screams to herself. Breathing in through her nose, she continues on.

_But who am I kidding?  
I know what I'm missing_

_I, I had my heart set on you  
But nothing else hurts like you do  
Who knew that love was so cruel (yeah, yeah, yeah)  
And I waited and waited so long  
For someone who'll never come home  
It's my fault to think you'd be true (yeah, yeah)  
I'm just a fool_

_For holding onto something that's  
Is never ever gonna come back  
I can't accept that it's lost_

_I should've have let it go  
Held my tongue  
Kept my big mouth shut  
'Cause now everything is just wrong, wrong, wrong_

_I'm just a fool  
A fool for you  
I'm just a fool_

_I, I had my heart set on you  
But nothing else hurts like you do  
Who knew that love was so cruel (yeah, yeah, yeah)  
And I waited and waited so long  
For someone who'll never come home  
It's my fault to think you'd be true (yeah, yeah)  
I'm just a fool  
I'm just a fool  
I'm just a fool_

_It's my fault to think you'd be true (yeah, yeah, yeah)  
I'm just a fool_

Alice, was standing in the back of the cafe as Bella performed her last song. Bella's hesitation in the middle of the song didn't go unnoticed by Alice. Folding her arms across her chest. "Someone hurt that girl." she mumbles to herself. "I will find out who, if it's the last thing I do"

*FFY*

* * *

**_A/N:_**

**Okay so a little more of Bella at the cafe, the song in this chapter belongs to Christina Aguilera ~ Just a Fool. Next chapter we will start to see the love unfold in teenage E and B. Thanks for reading. See y'all next time. **

**I have a group on FB, CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there. I have a Banner for this chapter up in the group as well as what Jake and Alice look like. **

** groups/469619903102273/**

**_Rec time:_**

**Alice Vampire will be debuting her latest Fic~ Black & White~ March 13th! I'm super excited about this! Please keep an eye out for it. I will be posting the link once it's up. Also check out her FB group Alice Vampire.**

**Alice Vampire will also be hosting an open Q&A in her group Sunday March 10th from 1-3 PST for all her group members. She will be answering any questions you have for Black & White. **

**_Summary reads:_**

**_Black & White:_**** Edward Cullen and Bella Swan live in a black and white world. He is a widower and single father. She is a photographer and confirmed bachelorette. Both have locked their hearts and thrown away the key. Picture the colors that return to their worlds as their hearts are set free ...**


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, cutestkidsmom, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

Chapter eight:

April 2009

The school year had gone by in the blink of an eye it seemed. "Gosh, I can't believe summer is only a month and a half away."

"Yup, the year went by pretty fast," Edward mumbled, not looking up from his textbook.

Edward's always stayed at Bella's after school to do homework. She would have chips and dip for them to snack on. After their homework was done, they would go into the den for a few hours and lay on the floor listening to music. That was one of the things they had in common, their love for music. Edward loved playing the piano, and Bella loved playing her guitar.

He hadn't played the piano in a while because his mother had sold it to get her next fix. Bella remembers that day like it was yesterday. The look in Edwards eye, when he ran to her house and told her what his mother had done. That was the first day Bella had seen Edward cry. After that, Bella never wavered in her quest to get a piano for Edward. Hitting up her parents first, they immediately said no. None of the Swans played, therefore, her request seemed frivolous.

Bella searched the internet for cheap pianos and she found one at an estate sale. She begged her mom and dad to take her to buy it. She had gotten money from her grandparents for her birthday the previous year and she had enough to buy it on her own. Her father eventually caved so now the Swans had a baby grand sitting in their den.

"Play my lullaby Edward?" Bella asked him.

"Nah...don't feel like playing much," he said. A hint of sadness behind his refusal. Edward had never refused Bella anything and with that refusal alone she instantly knew something was wrong.

Turning over on her stomach placing her head on her forearms, she looked at him—really looked at him. He looked tired; he had bags under his eyes, and his skin looked blotchy. How could she not have noticed his appearance before?

"Hey...what's wrong?" she whisped.

Edward shook his head indicating that nothing was wrong.

"How long have we known each other?" Bella asked him

"I don't know, Bella, about five, six years..why?" he answered, irritated at her question.

"Stop being a smart ass, it's been three years. Don't you think I know when you're lying?" Bella rolled her eyes. "I know my best friend, and something is definitely wrong." Reaching out she touched his cheek. "What is it, you know you can tell me anything. Is it your Mom?"

"No, it's not her this time, well it's sorta because of her." Running a hand down his face "My dad's wife is trying to convince him to sell the house. Said she's tired of supporting us and my mom." Edward tugged at the strands of his hair, that action alone was a dead giveaway that Edward was frustrated. "She doesn't want my mom living in the house anymore."

"But I thought that was part of the child support order, since your mom lost your orginal home, your dad had to allow you all to live in this house till Jasper turned eighteen?" Bella asked sitting up.

"Yea, that's what I thought too. But mom said that she got notified that dad is taking her back to court to fight that," he said in a huff. "All over that stupid bitch..." slamming his hands on the floor "...you know she has no claim on any of this. That house we live in was the first house my parents bought together." Pointing a finger in the direction of his home "She's trying to get her slimy hands on that too. Isn't it enough she took everything else from us?" Edward's voice became a whisper, devastation was written all over his face.

"So what's going to happen if they get their way and you guys have to leave?" Bella's voice trembled with just the thought of Edward not being next door anymore.

"Mom is so pissed, she was on a rampage last night. Kept saying that she was done." Edward stared out the window "That if they wanted everything so bad, then they can have it. Said that she was going to tell the judge to award custody to my dad," Edward mumbled the last part.

Bella just stared at him, not having the courage to speak. She knew if she opened her mouth all that will come out would be sobs. When she didn't say anything, Edward looked up at her, what he saw made him even angrier at his parents. His Mom, for giving up and throwing their lives away after his father left. His father, for being such a cold hearted asshole who was willing to throw away his family, and for what, a twenty-one year old piece of ass that will most likely suck him dry and leave him?

Getting up on his knees, he inched closer to Bella. "Please don't...don't cry, B," he whispered softly, brushing the pads of his thumbs down her cheeks.

Holding onto his forearms, "E...wh...wha...what am I going to do w...without you? Who...who's going t..to walk me home from school, who's gonna ea...eat pizza and popcorn with me? Who will I sing t...tt...to?"

"I love you, B" he whispered.

"Like grown-ups do" she mumbled through her tears.

"No. For real." For the second time, Edward allowed his best friend to see him cry. His tears ran hot tracks down his cheeks as he pulled Bella into his arms and onto the floor. They clung to each other for hours and cried.

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N**

**A little more of Bella and Edwards friendship/love as teenagers. Thanks for reading. See y'all next time.**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there. I have a Banner for this chapter up in the group as well.**

** groups/469619903102273/**

**Rec time:**

**I'm super excited to announce my pre-reader and beautiful friend has written her first fic! Go read and show her some love!**

**Sunshine And Rainbows by Little Miss Norty ~**

**Summary reads:**

**One woman's internal fight between right and wrong. Battling heart over head. One man's attempt to show her life can be good. Life isn't always sunshine and rainbows, but can a certain co-worker change all of that?**

**Alice Vampire will be debuting her latest Fic~ Black & White~ March 13th! I'm super excited about this! Please keep an eye out for it. I will be posting the link once it's up. Also check out her FB group Alice Vampire.**

**Summary reads:**

**Black & White: Edward Cullen and Bella Swan live in a black and white world. He is a widower and single father. She is a photographer and confirmed bachelorette. Both have locked their hearts and thrown away the key. Picture the colors that return to their worlds as their hearts are set free ...**


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing and beautiful Beta, cutestkidsmom, my wonderful prere aders Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time and helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

Chapter nine:

About two weeks had passed since Bella had last seen Edward. Well, she technically saw him almost every day or better yet, heard him. Her bedroom window had a view of the backyard which directly faced Edwards's porch. She heard him all the time and when she would look out her window she would see him sitting there with all his so called friends and their skanks.

Victoria and Trisha Cordova... It made her skin crawl that Edward was even hanging out with the likes of them. They've had their eyes on Edward since high school. The first time they showed interest in Edward was at a high school football game.

Bella and Edward were sitting on the bleachers watching the game and sharing some nachos, when Riley Biers comes up to them with Victoria and Trisha in tow. He introduced them and for the rest of the night Edward had to fight off their advances. That was the first night that Bella felt jealous over Edward.

Walking out of her room, she sees Emmett sitting on the sofa with Charlie. "Hey, Em, whatcha doing here?" Bella plops down next to him.

"What I'm not allowed over now too?" he retorts.

"Ughh...that's not what I meant and you know it!" She smacks him on the leg.

"Well I figured I'd go with you to your Doc appointment today."

"Really...you really wanna come?" she says a little surprised.

"Of course I want to come, that little one is my niece or nephew, why wouldn't I?" he scoffs.

"Umm..well I dunno." Bella shrugs. "I have to be there at 2:30 to check in, so let me grab my keys and we can go."

Bella looks over at her Dad as she gets up and he has a smile playing on his lips and he winks at her. He knows that Emmett going with Bella means the world to her. Even though Edward shows no interest in this baby, at least Emmett is.

The doctor's appointment went well, she was informed that she was three months along, and at the end of her first trimester. Bella and Emmett were able to hear the babies heart beat, which was like music to Bella's ears. She got her first look at her baby and even got a picture of him. "His heartbeat was so strong wasn't it? I bet he's going to be a big boy." she tells Emmett looking at the ultrasound picture.

"Bella, it can be a girl too ya know." Emmett laughs.

"It's not...I just have this feeling, I can't explain it, I can feel it in my heart. It's going to be a boy." she sighs.

Sitting out in the backyard enjoying the rest of the evening by a bonfire with her Dad, Mom, Mike and Em. They're all talking about planning a camping trip to La Jolla Indian reservation in June for Father's Day. Bella has her guitar resting against her leg, her dad loves to sit out back and listen to her sing.

As their conversation quiets down, her dad stretches his legs out in front of him. "Sing my song baby girl," he asks her as he folds his arms across his chest.

Leaning forward a little, placing her guitar in her lap, she begins.

_On a dark desert highway, cool wind in my hair  
Warm smell of colitas, rising up through the air  
Up ahead in the distance, I saw a shimmering light  
My head grew heavy and my sight grew dim  
I had to stop for the night  
There she stood in the doorway;  
I heard the mission bell  
And I was thinking to myself,  
"This could be Heaven or this could be Hell"  
Then she lit up a candle and she showed me the way  
There were voices down the corridor,  
I thought I heard them say..._

Welcome to the Hotel California  
Such a lovely place (Such a lovely place)  
Such a lovely face  
Plenty of room at the Hotel California  
Any time of year (Any time of year)  
You can find it here

Her mind is Tiffany-twisted, she got the Mercedes bends  
She got a lot of pretty, pretty boys she calls friends  
How they dance in the courtyard, sweet summer sweat.  
Some dance to remember, some dance to forget

So I called up the Captain,  
"Please bring me my wine"  
He said, "We haven't had that spirit here since nineteen sixty nine"  
And still those voices are calling from far away,  
Wake you up in the middle of the night  
Just to hear them say...

Welcome to the Hotel California  
Such a lovely place (Such a lovely place)  
Such a lovely face  
They livin' it up at the Hotel California  
What a nice surprise (what a nice surprise)  
Bring your alibis

Mirrors on the ceiling,  
The pink champagne on ice  
And she said  
"We are all just prisoners here, of our own device"  
And in the master's chambers,  
They gathered for the feast  
They stab it with their steely knives,  
But they just can't kill the beast  
Last thing I remember, I was  
Running for the door  
I had to find the passage back  
To the place I was before  
"Relax, " said the nightman,  
"We are programmed to receive.  
You can check-out any time you like,  
But you can never leave! "

Opening her eyes as she strums the last cords of the song, looking up, someone catches her eye. She sees Edward with his hands in his pockets, standing on his back porch staring at her.

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N**

**Chapter song~ Hotel California by The Eagles. **

**Okay so some insight into Bella's pregnancy. How many of you are loving Em? What do you all think it's going to be a girl or boy? Thank you for reading! See ya'll next time! **

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there. I have a pic for this chapter up.**

** groups/469619903102273/**

**Rec time:**

**Black & White by Alice Vampire ~  
Summary reads:  
Edward Cullen and Bella Swan live in a black and white world. He is a widower and single father. She is a photographer and confirmed bachelorette. Both have locked their hearts and thrown away the key. Picture the colors that return to their worlds as their hearts are set free ...Angst, drama, humor and romance**

**Because Of A Boy by cutestkidsmom ~  
Summary reads:  
Edward is the son of an Autistic father. Bella is the mother of an Autistic son. What happens when their paths cross. Can they find peace and love with in the chaos. Rated T for minor language and some adult situations.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, cutestkidsmom, Daphodill,Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

_Chapter ten:_

_May 23rd 2009_

Bella and Edward were both May babies; Bella was born on the twenty-first and Edward on the twenty-sixth. For their fifteenth birthday the Swans threw them both a party. Edward begged Bella not to include him.

"Pfftt, are you really asking me that E? I'm your best friend. It's my job to make a big deal out of the day you were born."

"Okay, so make a big deal on Tuesday...just not on Saturday in front of everyone. I don't like when people stare at me when they sing happy birthday, I get embarrassed." he challenged.

"Well, too bad, 'cause the cake is already ordered and your name is gonna be on it. You can stand behind me and hide when they sing." She said with a giggle.

.

.

Smiling at the memory from a few days ago, Bella continued to line the candles on their cake. Not very many people were invited, just Emmett, Jasper and James, along with a few of the neighbors. Renee also invited Edward's Aunt Rose and Mama Esme. Bella was super excited; she couldn't wait to see the look on Edward's face when he opened up the gift she bought him.

_A few months back, on a trip to the mall, Edward was looking at a leather wrist cuff in one of the shop windows. Bella pulled him inside to ask how much it cost. They were told it was forty dollars and with engraving sixty. As they walked out of the shop, Bella noticed the sad look on Edward's face. She knew he wanted it but couldn't afford it, so she worked weekends babysitting and saved enough money to return to the store and buy Edward the leather cuff, having it engraved with his initials "EAC." _

"Honey, everyone is arriving, Esme and Rose just pulled up." Renee informed Bella bringing her out of her thoughts, as she walked into the kitchen. "I just need to grab some plates and napkins and I'll be right out." Renee said reaching into the cabinet.

"Okay, I'll go and say hi. Is there anything you want me to take out back?" Bella asked

"Grab the bag of chips. Daddy is almost done with the burgers and hotdogs."

Walking out into the backyard, Bella is greeted by everyone.

"Happy birthday, Bella." Rose greets her with a hug.

"Thanks, Rose, I'm so glad you guys made it. I'm sure Edward will be happy to see you and your mom here. Is Edward here already?" she asked Rose.

"Yea, he's sitting with Mama, over by the tree."

"I'll go and say hi." Walking over to where Edward and his brothers were sitting with their grandmother, Bella greeted Esme with a hug. "Hi Mama, how are you? Thank you for coming."

"Oh, my dear girl, thank you for having us. Happy birthday! You and my little Eddie here are getting so big... I can't believe you're fifteen already," Mama said, cupping Bella's face. "Every year you get more and more beautiful. How many boys does Eddie have to chase away at school, huh?" Bella blushed and giggled. She looked over at Edward who had the biggest smile on his face.

"None anymore, Mama, I've threatened them all already." he said winking at his Mama.

"That's my boy, you protect this precious girl." Mama pat Edward's cheek. "So...darling, when are you gonna make our beautiful Bella your girlfriend?" Mama holds Edward's gaze, putting him on the spot, she felt he needed a little push. She knew her grandson and could tell that his feelings for Bella ran deeper than just friendship.

Edward stared at his grandmother in disbelief. He new the old lady never held her tongue but to blatantly embarrass him like that, he didn't know what to do or say besides shake his head and laugh, hoping that by not acknowledging her comment she would stop. Edward scooted over and motioned for Bella to sit between him and his grandmother.

"Happy birthday B, So...there's a lot of people here." he whispered.

"Um, no there isn't," Bella scoffed. "Don't start okay...Nothing is gonna happen to you if they all sing Happy birthday. Just enjoy it." She waved him off. "Oh, and Happy birthday to you too E." Bella patted his knee.

The food was long eaten and everyone was sitting around chatting and enjoying the rest of the afternoon. Renee walks out holding the cake, asks everyone to gather around so they can sing Happy Birthday. Placing two chairs in front of the cake, she tells Bella and Edward to sit so she could take a picture. Bella smiles as she looks at Edward. He rolls his eyes, huffs and sits down.

"Smile, E." she whispered and pinched his side.

"Okay, come closer you two, say cheese," Renee instructed.

Wrapping an arm around Bella, they lean into each other and smile. Renee snaped the photo and everyone started to sing Happy Birthday. After the cake, Renee and Tanya brought out the presents. Handing Edward his presents, he looked up surprised.

"What's this?" he asked Tanya.

"Those are what we call presents, Edward." she said sarcastically.

"I know what they are ya' fool, but why are you handing them to me?" Edward furrowed his brow.

"Uh...because they have your name on them?" Tanya rolled her eyes.

"Edward it's a birthday party, did you expect to not get gifts?" Bella gathered her presents and sat down next to him.

"Yes," he hissed running a hand through his hair. "It's bad enough they sang to me, now I have to open gifts in front of everyone?"

"Well, whatever, get over yourself and shut up." She smiled up at him. "Let's open presents!" she said as she clapped her hands together.

Everyone left once all the presents were opened. Emmett, Jasper and Edward stay to help them with the clean up. Bella pulled Edward into the kitchen and handed him a small wrapped gift box.

"Before you say anything...just know that I wanted to get you something, so please don't ruin my excitement with your grouchy attitude." she told him.

Shaking his head and smiling he turned and walked out of the kitchen only to come back with a gift of his own.

"I got you something too, it's not much, but when I saw it I thought of you." he handed her the gift.

They opened their gifts together. Edward looked up at Bella with wide eyes.

"Bella...you got me the cuff? It's too much; you shouldn't have spent so much on me." he looked at her with wide eyes.

"I wanted to get it for you, besides it has your initials, I can't take it back." She shrugged, looking down at her present.

"I love the journal, Edward, Thank you." she affirmed, hugging it to her chest.

"Well compared to your gift, mine is crap." He huffed.

"Edward..." Bella smacked him on the shoulder.

"Okay, Okay... You're welcome." Throwing his hands up in surrender. "Thank you for my gift, B, I love it."

"Great! See that wasn't so bad was it; you don't always have to be a grouch." She poked a finger at his chest. "Did you have fun?" she asked.

"Actually, I did. I think this was one of my best birthdays ever." He pulled her into a bone crushing hug.

"Well, we have many birthdays to make even better." she told him.

"Yup, forever. I'll never spend a birthday without you," he whispered in her ear.

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N:**

**I have been asked "what is Edward thinking or feeling" so I will be having an EPOV outtake coming. Thank you for reading, see ya'll next time.**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there.**

** groups/469619903102273/**

**Rec time:**

**Not sure if you all have heard of the TwiHEAcontest going on! There are so many great stories up, go on over to read them. Search under author for the contest.**

**Also LDA (Let's do anal) Anon Twific Contest is accepting OS as well! Search under author for LDA Anon Twific Contest. **


	11. EPOV

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.  
Thank you to my amazing and beautiful Beta, cutestkidsmom, my wonderful prere aders Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time and helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

Continuation to Chapter nine:

_EPOV~_

As I'm walking onto my back porch, I hear her voice before I see her, making sure to stay away from the light so I'm not discovered and can enjoy this private show. I stand there and just listen to my little love sing. The only pure and beautiful thing I have left in my life. I can hear it, it's faint and she hides it well, but I know it's there. I know because I put it there, that sadness she carries around, the void in her voice. I could pick it out a mile away, and I hate myself for putting her through this. I promised myself I would never hurt her, that I would always love her, that I wouldn't be my father.

How did my life become such a mess? How did I become so fucked up that I hurt the one person who truly loved me? I have hurt B in ways that I can't possibly comprehend or even begin to make amends for. I have said some fucked-up shit and the sad thing about it is, I realize what I'm doing and I see how badly I've hurt her but I can't seem to stop. I try so hard, it's like I have 2 different people inside me fighting each other for dominance, and the devil always wins.

.

"What's up?"

"Shit, what's up with you?" Edward says, never taking his eyes off the TV.

"Nothin' much. I saw B yesterday, went to her doc appointment with her." Emmett plops himself down on the sofa.

"What the fuck," Edward huffs out and snaps his eyes to Emmett. A twinge of hurt and jealousy runs through his body.

"Ay Bro, if you wanna be a piece of shit and not be involved that's your choice. But it's not that easy for me, that kid is a part of us, whether you like it or not."

"Fuck," Edward mumbles, throwing his head back against the sofa. "Em, you know I love her and it's not that I don't want to be involved."

"Then what is it? Cause from here that's exactly what it looks like bro," Emmett states.

"I don't fuckin know Em. Yea I'm scared shitless about the baby, about being a dad. I never meant for things to get this out of hand. I never meant to… to hurt her the way I have." Edward whispers. "I was pissed about the pregnancy; I wasn't ready at all to be a father. To be responsible for another's life, so I ran." Edward shrugs. " I knew that accepting she was pregnant would mean I needed to stop fucking around, clean up my act. I panicked; I'm fucking nineteen years old and look what shit my life is already! This crap has me by the balls bro, when I'm sober like now, I know how fucked up I've been and all the asshat shit I've done and said. I can't turn it off; I just keep going over it again and again in my mind, to the point where all I wanna do is get high to forget. Then I wonder if they're just better off without me, what good am I to them. I'm a drug addict Emmett." Edward leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees.

"How is she? She hates me doesn't she? I've gone over there and all I seem to do is upset her. I can never say the right thing. I'm such a fucking asshole!" Edwards grits out, pulling at the ends of his hair.

"Well, she's hanging in there; she's pretty fucking strong, Bro. She's trying to go on as normal as possible. We don't talk much about you actually." Emmett shrugs. "I can see she's hurting, she won't admit to it, but I can see it in her eyes. The baby is growing, I saw him yesterday, heard his heart." Emmett smiles over at Edward.

"He?" Edward opens his eyes and stares at his brother. "It…it's a boy?"

"Na, it's too soon to tell what it is. But B swears up and down that it's gonna be a boy, says, 'it's a gut feeling she has.' She loves that kid already; she's pouring all she has into this baby."

"Yea, I can just imagine." Edward chuckles, "she never does anything half assed and she loves with a passion."

"Ya know I'm not one to meddle, but E you really got to get your shit together. Call dad, go to rehab, I'm sure he would be more than willing to help you. I know we had a shitty last couple of years, with both of our parents ditching us. No kid should have to go through what we have, especially not one of ours."

"I know," Edward whispers.

"Well then get your fucking shit together. That kid deserves every possible chance at a life with both of his parents. We had a great life up till a few years ago, Mom and Dad provided for us, gave us everything we could have ever wanted. Don't you think your kid deserves that too? He or she didn't ask to be brought into this world, dipshit. That was a consequence of yours and B's actions; you gotta step up and be a man. I don't have a problem with being there and helping her with the baby. I will provide for it, but I'm sure he or she would much rather know and be loved by their dad. Be the man I know you are, E, do the right thing. Get your head out of your ass." Emmett chuckles. "I love you, Bro, and I'm always here for you." Emmett stands and walks out.

"Fuck," Edward mumbles out.  
I know everything Emmett said is the truth. My kid deserves the best, I'm just so fucking terrified. I can only imagine how B is feeling, how scared she must be going through this alone. I knew I was fucking up and I couldn't stop it. One minute …we were so happy living together… we were really making it, I had my job at the Casino; B had her job. Thinking back now I regret ever befriending those fucking idiots. But I can't blame them for everything; I realize that, but a part of me, the chicken shit part would love to just point a finger and take the easy way out.

The sad reality is that I'm to blame for the way our lives have turned out. All this is because of all the choices I made. I have become the one person I swore I never would. The day my father walked out on us, destroyed my mother and she was never the same again, she took her anger out on us and stopped living. The light she had in her eyes stopped burning. Now I've done that to B, and I'm fucking disgusted in myself, I hate myself for it. I don't know how to make things better. How could she possibly ever forgive me?

Cradling his head in his hands he whispers to himself through tears, "I'm so sorry B; I love you so fucking much. I swear I'll do better."

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N:**

**So there you have it, some insight in to Edwards head. Hope it answered a few of your questions. Thank you for reading, see ya'll next time. **

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there.**

** groups/469619903102273/**

**Rec time:**

**Not sure if you all have heard of the TwiHEAcontest going on! There are so many great stories up, go on over to read them. Search under author for the contest. **

**Also LDA (Let's do anal) Anon Twific Contest is accepting OS as well! Search under author for LDA Anon Twific Contest.**


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing and beautiful Beta, cutestkidsmom, my wonderful prere aders Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time and helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

Chapter eleven:

April 2013

Bella spots Alice sitting in a booth near the back of the restaurant. A few days ago Alice called and invited her to lunch. She was surprised by the invite since they don't really speak much outside the café. She would have felt bad turning down her boss so she accepted the invitation. Taking a deep breath, she tells the hostess that her party is already there and points toward Alice.

"Bella, thank you for having lunch with me. It's nice to see you outside the café."

"Yeah it is, thanks for inviting me." Bella says as she slides into the booth.

They both place their order and Bella sits back, the silence making her feel a bit awkward.

"So…" Alice says.

"So…umm, was there something special you wanted to discuss?" Bella asks furrowing her brows.

"Well, I just recently moved here from Seattle and I don't have many friends; I have this feeling about you. I think you and I will be great friends!" Alice gushes out excitedly.

"O….kay, Alice, a little excited much?" Bella laughs.

"So tell me about yourself Bella. Are you going to school? Have anyone special in your life?"

And there it was, with that last question Alice saw that look in Bella's eyes again. She is absolutely convinced a boy had hurt her. Waiting for Bella to answer, Alice picks up her iced tea and takes a sip.

"Um…I'm not going to school right now. I took some time off." Clearing her throat she continues, "Look Alice I don't like to talk about this, but being that you're my boss and my situation might affect my work. I think I should tell you."

"Oh… Your situation?" Alice states a little confused.

"I'm pregnant." Bella mumbles.

"Um…come again? I don't think I heard you correctly?"

"I'm fourteen weeks pregnant Alice." Bella huffs.

"OH WOW!" Alice places her hand on her mouth. "Is that why you're always so sad? I thought some douche had hurt you."

"You've noticed huh? Well, that would be a 'yes' to both your questions."

"Okay, so yes to being emo during pregnancy, and yes to a douche hurting you? I'm assuming this douche is the father?"

Bella answers with a nod to her head. She doesn't look Alice in the eye. She hates when people look at her with pity, you know that look, where they tilt their head and say, "Oh I'm so sorry," as if that would change things. When Alice doesn't say anything, Bella chances a glance at her. Alice is quietly looking at Bella, waiting for her to continue and there isn't a single drop of pity in her eyes.

"Yeah the douche is the father, he freaked when he found out I was pregnant, but that was just the icing on the cake. He's an addict; things weren't going so great with us at the time. So when we found out I was pregnant he flipped out and left."

"I see... May I ask, what's his drug of choice?"

"Meth." Bella states.

Alice lets out a deep breath. "I'm sorry you have to go through this alone, but I'm not sorry that a douche druggie has removed himself from your life. I can only imagine how much it hurts, but Bella, do you seriously want someone like that in your life, in your child's life?" Alice asks her.

"I've known him for 8 years, Alice, he was my best friend," she whispers. "It does hurt, very much, at times all I want to do is lay in bed all day. I blamed myself, if only I'd seen the signs sooner, done more for him; but I realized that I couldn't have done anything differently. All I can blame myself for is loving him, maybe a little too much. I still love him; I don't think I can turn that off. But I can't save him, if he doesn't want to be saved. I pray for him every day that he opens his eyes and see's the damage he is causing to himself and those around him. I pray that one day my child will be loved by his or her father." Bella looks at Alice as a lone tear slips down her cheek.

"Oh honey." Alice reaches for Bella's hand. "I'm so very proud of you for thinking that way, not many people who love an addict are able to walk away, give them tough love. If you need anything, please know you have a friend in me, even if it's just a shoulder to cry on, I'm here."

"Thank you, Alice, I appreciate that, more than you know." Bella says with a smile.

"Okay, well enough of the sad stuff. You're gonna have a baby!" Alice squeals. "Oh, Bella, I can't wait to go shopping for this little one!"

Groaning, Bella places her head in her hands. "Alice just the thought of shopping, makes me nauseous."

"Well, thank the heavens you know me then! I love to shop. Just think of me as your personal baby shopper." Alice's face lighting up.

"Oh, good lord." Bella chuckles.

"Oh… do you have a theme yet? I suppose not, you don't know what you're having, do you? The second you find out call me. I need to plan!" Alice's gushes out.

"Alice, I still have six and a half months before the baby is here." Bella sighs.

"O-M-G, Bella… and even that's not enough time! There are tons of things to consider, like the theme for instance, what kind of stroller you will want? Oh! And if it's a girl, you know a girl can never have too many outfits!" Alice is bouncing in her seat. "Don't worry, Bella, Auntie Alice is here, I will take care of everything. See I told you we would be great friends!"

"Oh dear god, please help me."

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N:**

**Thank you for reading, see ya'll next time.  
I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there.**

** groups/469619903102273/**

_**Rec time:**_

**New Contest!**

**Twific-textmessagelolcontest **

**We bring you the funniest text message, iPhone fail, Auto correct fail and just plain old crazy LOL Fic's.**

**It can be any pairing, any 'ward, any 'ella, wolves, vamps, AH, AU, ANYTHING. As long as your OS has somewhere in the story line an auto correct fail, text message fail and most important it needs to be funny as hell ;)**

**Get creative! We want it all!**

**Search under author for the contest.**

*********************************************************  
Not sure if you all have heard of the TwiHEAcontest going on! There are so many great stories up, go on over to read them. Search under author for the contest. **

*******************************************************  
Also LDA (Let's do anal) Anon Twific Contest is accepting OS as well! There are some really good stories up already. Search under author for LDA Anon Twific Contest.**


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, cutestkidsmom, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

_Chapter 12_

_July 2010_

After being summoned back to court; the judge sided in Elizabeth's favor and ordered Carlisle to abide by the original ruling. He was to maintain the home and his sons, and Elizabeth would be allowed to live there until Jasper turned eighteen. Bella was ecstatic with the news that they didn't have to move. Edward and his brothers were spending part of the summer with their father down in Del Mar and had been gone an entire month already. Bella was going crazy without him, he would call or text her every night. So when she got hired at a boutique in the mall, she couldn't wait to tell him.

E, I got the job! ~ B

You did congrats! ~E

Wait what job you are talking about ~ E

*rolls eyes* the sales position at that boutique, I told you about ~B

Were you even paying attention the other day ~B

I always pay attention to you ;) must have slipped my mind is all ~E

Yeah, yeah. Whatever! So when do you come home ~B

Miss me huh? ~E

Stop being dumb and answer the question ~B

LOL, I'll be home next weekend ~E

I work next weekend ~B

Maybe I can come bring you lunch ~E

:) ~B

;) ~E

Bella was busy arranging the shirts on the rack when Jason walked in. Jason worked at the ice cream shop next door. "Hey Bella, just came to see when you're taking lunch. Thought we could maybe have lunch together?"

"Oh, hey, Jason, um… I'm scheduled for my lunch in about fifteen minutes," Bella said looking at her watch.

"Alright, great. I'll take my lunch then, I'll meet you here in fifteen?"

"Okay, see ya then." Bella smiled up at him. Jason was kinda handsome, she thinks to herself, he's about five foot eleven and one hundred and eighty five pounds. Creamy white skin, reddish brown hair and beautiful crystal blue eyes. He has the cutest dimples when he smiles. He's about a year or so older than Bella. He flirted with Bella the first day she walked into the ice cream shop. When he found out she worked next door, he started coming in all the time to talk to her. Bella had never befriended another boy other than Edward and his brothers. So having Jason invite her to lunch, made her heart pitter patter.

Clocking out for her lunch hour; she grabbed her lunch bag and started to make her way out of the store. As she looked up, she saw Edward walking in.

"Edward, your back!" She ran up to hug him.

"Hey, B, yeah got back last night actually. I wanted to surprise you, that's why I didn't text," he said, smiling.

Just as they were pulling away from each other, the door chimed notifying that someone had walked in. Bella looked up and spotted Jason walking their way. She stiffened a little, nervous of what Edward might think of Jason.

"Bella hey, you ready for lunch?," Jason asked, walking up to her, eyeing Edward up and down.

"I thought I was taking you to lunch?" Edward answered for her, never removing his arm from around Bella.

"You didn't tell me you had a boyfriend Bella?" Jason starred Edward in the eyes.

Bella looked between the two boys. "Jason this is my friend Edward. Edward this is Jason, he works next door."

"Hmm..." Edward grumbled "...You ready, B, I'm starving." Not waiting for a response, he pulled Bella out the door.

"Edward…geez! Don't be rude," she huffed.

"Jason, I'm sorry, Edward just got back into town, can we have lunch some other time?" She asked Jason apologetically.

"Sure no problem, Bella, you know where to find me," Jason mumbled as he walked out the door.

"Edward what the heck was that?" Bella asked as she placed her hands on her hips.

"Nothing, what? What did I do?" Edward looked at her innocently.

"You know what you did! You need to stop." She pointed a finger in his face.

Once at the sandwich shop, they placed their order and took a seat outside. Edward noticed Bella's annoyed expression.

"Look, B, I'm sorry okay? I don't know...I just get jealous whenever another guy talks to you..." he shrugged "...You're my B." he looked at her pensively. Wondering how he should phrase the question he was about to ask. "Okay..answer me this...You like me don't you, you think I'm handsome?" He asked, leaning back in his chair he cocked his head to the side and smirked.

"What?" Caught completely off guard by his question, Bella released a nervous laugh, her traitorous blush reached the apples of her cheeks. The reality was that Bella did think Edward was the most handsome boy she had ever seen. He had the most beautiful green eyes; she could stare at them all day. He had wild hair, that she loved running her fingers through. He was very sweet and attentive and he knew Bella like no one else.

So many kids at school had become boyfriend and girlfriend, then a week later breakup and never speak to each other again. Bella didn't want that for her and Edward. She would love to be his girlfriend, but she wanted him in her life even more. She couldn't even fathom the idea of him not being there if they broke up.

"See, you do like me, look you're blushing." He smiled, pointing to her cheeks.

"Of course I like you, if I didn't I wouldn't put up with you!" She threw her hands up in the air.

"Okay, so I have an awesome idea!" She could see the mischief in his eyes as he spoke.

"I was thinking...why don't you just be my girlfriend and we can avoid all this?" He waved his hands.

"E be serious." Bella threw her head back and laughed.

"I am being serious," he answered.

Looking at him, she could tell he was more than serious, the smile she had, was no longer there. "E, you're my best friend and I love you. What happens if we break up? I would rather have your friendship," Bella told him, shaking her head.

Edward sighed heavily. "Why would we break up? We've been best friends for years. We love each other, you think I'm handsome, I think you're beautiful. What could possible break us up? No... I think we would be together forever."

"Ya never know, E, ya never know." She chuckled at his craziness.

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N:**

**Happy Easter everyone, hope ya'll have a Blessed one :)**

**Thank you for reading, see ya'll next time.**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there.**

** groups/469619903102273/ Rec time:**

**New Contest!**

**Twific textmessagelolcontest**

**We bring you the funniest text message, iPhone fail, Auto correct fail and just plain old crazy LOL Fic's.**

**It can be any pairing, any 'ward, any 'ella, wolves, vamps, AH, AU, ANYTHING. As long as your OS has somewhere in the story line an auto correct fail, text message fail and most important it needs to be funny as hell ;)**

**Get creative! We want it all!**

* * *

**Rec Time:**

**I Want A Mommy! by: TheStrong1**

**I am loving this fic! I love a good mobward. Bella is the sweetest in this fic and E.J. Is the cutest little green eyed boy!**

**Summary reads: MOBWARD! DADWARD! 34 year old Edward Cullen is the head of the Cullen Family, he's deadly, he's charming, and he's a single father with a small boy who's greatest wish it to have a Mom. 21 year old Isabella is sweet, maternal, loving and good natured. When the Cullen boys crash into her world, she finds her lonely simple life is never going to be the same.**

**Deviant by: planetblue**

**This fic is H.O.T hot! An Edward I've never read! He's my creamward, he will make you change the panties every chapter!**

**Summary reads: He pissed me off and then he turned me on. Spectacularly.**


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, cutestkidsmom, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time out to help me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

Chapter thirteen:

_April 2013_

"Bella...Bella..."

"Hmmm...go away,Tan." Bella's voice is hoarse from sleep. Turning over Bella opens her eyes to see her sister laying in bed with her.

"What time is it?"

"Time for you to get up." Tanya pulls the blankets down. "Mom's making pancakes with hash browns for breakfast."

"Mmm...I love pancakes, but I love sleep and my bed even more," Bella mumbles as she pulls the blanket over her head.

"Come on, Bella," Tanya whines, "It's Sunday, you don't work today and I wanna spend time with my sister."

"UGHHH fine, fine...I'm up." Bella huffs, throwing off her blankets .

Meals at the Swans is always lively, this morning was no exception. All eyes are on Bella, eager to learn about her new job.

"So, when can we all come to one of your shows?" Mike asks with a mischievous grin.

"No...No way, I'm nervous enough as it is. I would totally choke having you all there watching me," Bella tells them.

Mike is about to say something when he gets interrupted by the doorbell.

"It's ten-thirty in the morning, who in the hell can that be?" Charlie huffs as he pushes his chair back. "It better not be that boyfriend of yours Tanya," he shoots her a pointed look.

Tanya and James have been together for about a year.

Charlie had to set ground rules very quickly.

"That boy is here all the damn time, do his parents not miss him?" he would say whenever James would darken their doorstep. Shortly thereafter, Charlie sat Tanya and James down and informed them that he was establishing "visiting hours". Needless to say, Tanya threw a fit, but once Charlie sets his mind to something, there's no getting him out of it.

"What do you want, Edward?" Charlie asks in annoyance. His commanding voice reaching his waiting family.

Bella's breath hitches as her eyes snap in the direction of the front door. All she can see is her dad's back.

"Morning Charlie...Can I speak with Bella?" Edward asks.

"No!" Charlie slams the door and marches back into the dining room.

Everyone at the table is looking at each other with wide eyes. Charlie took the Cullen boys in as if they were his own. When Bella and Edward got together it was Renee who had the problem. Charlie could see how much Edward loved his daughter, so he gave his blessing. Never in a million years did he think, a year later, he would be swallowing his words.

"The nerve of that boy! I don't want him in my house, Bella," he grumbles as he sits back down. "He wants to talk to you, you do it off my property. You hear me?" His eyes betray his tough-guy mask. Bella sees the pain, heartbreak, and disappointment that Edward has caused reflected in her father's eyes. Charlie loved Edward too.

"Yes, Dad, loud and clear," Bella says with a heavy sigh.

After clearing the table and washing the breakfast dishes, Bella goes out to her car to grab a bag of baby clothes Alice gave her the night before. Bella can't wait to show her mom and Tanya. As she is walking out her house she sees Edward leaning against her car smoking a cigarette. Stopping dead in her tracks she eyes him warily, her heart beats faster and her palms get sweaty. She takes in his appearance; he has dark blue jeans on, a plain white tee and baby blue vans.

Edward...his ability to get under Bella's skin is pain and pleasure. Against his fair skin, the colors of his tattoos become vibrant. Her fingers tingle at the memory of caressing the ornate drawings that adorn his flesh. Despite everything Edward has done, the sheer sight of him causes a primal response. Bella curses her traitorous body.

Bella takes a deep breath in hopes of strengthening her resolve. She knew she'd have to deal with him eventually. "What are you doing out here?" she hisses walking up to him.

"Waiting for you," he says with a shrug, blowing out a puff of smoke.

"Sorry, I'll put it out," he says as Bella waves her hands in front of her face.

"So..." Bella arches her brows and places a hand in the air, asking him to continue.

"I came to see you, B, I wanted to talk to you. I was thinking about you last night." Edward masks his anxiety by shoving his sweaty hands deep into his pocket. He's let Bella down so many times, there's no telling how she'll react. Emmett has made it clear that Edward has screwed up royally... He braces for impact as Bella steps closer.

Closing her eyes she releases a breath. "I can't do this dance with you, Edward. You being here only when it's convenient, when you don't have others to occupy your time. It's not fair to me, you made your choice."

"God dammit B! Are you always gonna throw that in my face. Just because I didn't want to be together anymore doesn't mean I don't want you in my life, you're my best friend," he grits out running a hand through his hair.

"That doesn't even make sense Edward! What the fuck does that even mean? You don't want to be together—you leave me high and dry, yet you still want to be friends?" Bella's face warms to a deep red as her body trembles with anger. "You don't want to be a father...so that would make you what to this baby, huh? Do you even realize how stupid that sounds!" she screams.

"Why...I don't see what the big deal is. We're just not boyfriend and girlfriend anymore. Why can't we just go back to being friends?" he asks throwing his hands in the air.

"Are you high right now... cause you're acting like it, Edward? You're either in or you're out. There's no in between. Besides, you can't even answer the question about the baby, can you? Do you even plan on being in its life?"

When he doesn't answer Bella responds, "See, that's what I'm talking about. I can't do this with you, not the way you want." Her voice turning to a whisper as she adds, "It hurts too much."

"B..." She can see him stepping closer to her.

She raises her hands to stop him. "Don't, don't do that...you can't fix this by hugging me, by trying to be my friend. I need the boy I fell in love with to be a man, get his shit together and stand by me."

"I'm here, B, I've always been here. I'm trying." He cups her face in his hands. "I love you."

"Yeah, just like grown ups do," she scoffs.

"No. For real." Edward musters up the courage to look her in the eye as he cradles her face. Her cheeks are just as soft as he remembers, her lips just as plump. He presses down the shame and guilt that he so desperately wants to numb with drugs and alcohol to meet Bella's angry and disappointed glare.

Bella fights her body's reaction to Edward's touch. She must protect her child...and herself from Edward. Only he has the power to destroy them all. "No," she growls, snatching his hands away from her face, "that's where you're wrong, Edward." Bella turns to walk back into the house. "If this was real, then we wouldn't be in this mess."

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N:**

**Thank you for reading, see ya'll next time.**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there.**

** groups/469619903102273/**

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	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, cutestkidsmom, Daphodill,Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

Chapter fourteen:

_September 2011_

Bella, shaking in anticipation, had the biggest smile on her face. She kept checking the clock and looking out the window. The second she heard her gate open, she flew out the front door.

"Edward, you're here!" Bella flung herself at him. He had just gotten back from spending his summer break at his father's home in Del Mar. Bella had been waiting for him all morning. They'd spoken on the phone the night before, with Bella squealing in his ear when Edward said he'd be home the next day.

Edward braced himself as Bella jumped into his open arms. He buried his nose in her hair and embraced her tightly.

"Honey, I'm home," he whispered playfully in her ear. "I told the taxi to drop me off here," he snorted as he motioned with his head towards his bags, "I haven't even been home, I had to see you first. I missed you."

Tightening her hold on him, Bella confessed, "I missed you too."

"So, how was your time at your dad's?" Bella asked as they walked to her backyard.

"Ehhh…It was alright, I guess. He's never home, always working. I honestly don't know why we even bother going." Edward rolled his eyes.

"Jasper didn't go this time, huh?"

"No, he said he didn't want to see him." Edward shook his head. "He wanted to stay with my mom. Even Emmett came home early."

"So…how was your time without me?" Edward smiled and lifted his eyebrows in question as they sat facing each other on the grass..

"It was horrible, I couldn't eat, sleep…I didn't even come out the house," Bella looked over at Edward wide eyed. She clapped her hands over her mouth trying to hold in her laughter.

"Yeah, I knew you'd be devastated. Life stops for you when I'm not around." Edward looked at her and winked.

"Oh please! You're so full of yourself, E." Bella reached over and smacked him on the stomach.

"What… are you saying your life doesn't revolve around me?" Edward looked at her with a shocked expression and clutched his heart.

"Uh...No it doesn't," Bella scoffed. "I worked. I went out a few times. I had fun actually," she informed him.

"You went out?" Edward asked with a solemn expression, "with who, when, where?"

"Geez, Dad, I didn't know I had to ask your permission. For your information it was with Jason."

"Jason…who the heck… Bella, that dude from the ice cream shop?" The look on Edward's face was as if she'd just told him his dog died.

"Yes, Edward, that's the very one," she huffed, crossing her arms over her chest. "Why do you say it like that, like there's something wrong with him? I don't know why it bothers you so much. We're not boyfriend and girlfriend, Edward." Bella turned and glared at him, "Besides, Emmett told me that you 'hooked' up with a girl while you were at your dad's this summer."

Edward snapped his eyes in Bella's direction and ran a hand through his hair.

"Fucking Emmett," he muttered under his breath. "It didn't mean anything, B. Why the fuck would he tell you, when did he tell you?" Edward threw his hands in the air.

"Why…why wouldn't You tell me? I thought we told each other everything, E," Bella whispered to him. Edward could hear the sadness in her voice.

"Emmett came over last weekend when he got back from your dad's. He was telling Mike about some girls you both hooked up with." Bella looked at Edward with disgust. "Mike started teasing me saying that the reason you stayed an extra week was because you had found a new _best friend_."

If Bella was being completely honest with herself, she was crushed that Edward was having sex. She cried herself to sleep that very night that Emmett spilled the beans. She knew she had no right to feel jealous or hurt; she had rejected Edward time and time again. Every time he would ask her to be his girlfriend she'd laugh and brush him off or flat out say no. Bella always knew that one day Edward would get tired of chasing her, that he'd start dating or _hooking up_; secretly she hoped it would never happen. She definitely didn't expect it to hurt so much.

"B, it's not like that—what did you want me to say, huh? 'Hey B, guess what, I just hooked up with some chick'?"

"YES! That's what best friends do. I would have told you."

Letting out a loud groan, Edward fell back onto the grass. "I don't wanna hear that shit from you, B," he mumbled.

Looking up at her with wide eyes, "Have you?" he asked.

"Have I what…'hooked' up with someone?" Bella could feel the heat rising to her cheeks. "No I haven't," she answered looking down at her lap.

Edward blew out a sigh of relief. "That's good."

"What… Are you serious?" Bella chuckled humorlessly. "You just got done admitting to me that you're having sex yet you're relieved I'm not? I honestly don't understand you E." Bella laid down beside Edward.

"I'm a guy, it's different for guys." He shrugged.

Bella turned on her side and laid her head on her hand. "How so?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

Turning over to face her he answered, "It just is. For a guy, we can have sex without having to be emotionally involved. It's just sex." He shrugged once more. "For girls, you fall in love with the guy, you want a commitment. It's more than just sex."

"O…kay, so why's it a good thing that I haven't had sex then?" Bella asked him, a bit confused.

"Because then that would mean that you were in love," Edward whispered.

.

.

.

_January 15th 2012_

"So there I am reading my book, minding my own business on the trolley, when this guy comes and sits in the seat right in front of me. I look over at him and smile, I say Hello- to be polite ya know. I go back to reading my book and I can feel this guy's eyes on me." Bella gushed out.

"Uh-ha" Edward mumbled.

"After a bit, he just starts talking to me, asks me what I'm reading, where I'm heading, where I was coming from."

"Did you answer him?"

"I told him about the book and that I was just getting off work." Bella replied "So, then he asks me what my name is. I told him my name was Christina."

"You did?" Edward snapped his eyes to Bella's, a beaming smile swept across his face. He was overjoyed with the fact that Bella gave the guy a fake name.

"Yeah, he really started creeping me out, I wasn't going to tell him my real name!" she shrieked as she grabbed Edward's shoulder and shoved him, playfully. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Anyway...then he asks how old I am and if I had a boyfriend."

"Did you tell him you did?"

"What?" Bella looked over at Edward from the driver's seat. They were sitting in her car at the train station waiting for Bella's aunt to arrive. She had come to visit for a few weeks.

"Did you tell him you had a boyfriend?" Edward asked her again.

"Umm… I…No I didn't." She shifted nervously in her seat, Bella knew where Edward was headed. It had been a while since they ventured down the "Bella be my girlfriend" road.

"Well you do, you should have told the guy the truth," Edward said looking out the window.

"I do…?"

"Yup, you do," Edward said matter of factly.

"And who might that be, E? Please enlighten me on this so called boyfriend I have," Bella asked with a sarcastic tone.

"Me," he said looking her in the eyes. It was as if he was daring her to say no, to reject him yet again. Bella was stunned into silence. Her mind was all over the place; her heart was pounding so hard she could hear it in her ears. Does she say no to him and watch her rejection crumble him all over again? If she said yes…she really wanted to say yes—God, did she ever want to say yes.

She had come to realize how much she truly loved Edward and how much she hated the idea of him being with other girls. But, there was always that lingering fear—that "what if." Could she really risk their friendship?

After what seemed like an eternity just staring at each other, she mustered up the courage to give him her answer.

"Okay," she whispered.

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N:**

**I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, so...the whole convo in the car between E and B, is true, that actually did happen to me coming home one day, I was recounting that day to the hubs while we were waiting for my aunt's train to arrive and that's how he asked me to be his girlfriend :) after several attempts from him and several no's from me, I finally said "okay" just like Bella ;) **

**Thank you for reading, see ya'll next time.**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there.**

** groups/469619903102273/**

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	16. Chapter 16

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, cutestkidsmom, Daphodill,Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

Chapter fifteen:

"How are you sweetheart, how's my great grand baby coming along?" Edward's grandmother, Mama Esme, asks Bella as she follows Mama into her living room.

"Would you like anything to drink while we wait for Rose to get home?" Mama asks Bella as she guides her to sit on the sofa.

Bella was having lunch with Edwards grandmother and aunt Rose at the local casino and had been looking forward to this lunch since Rose invited her, last week. The buffet serves a pesto and Cobb salad that Bella loves; just thinking about it makes her mouth water. They'd eat lunch first and then go play slots for a few hours.

"I'm good, Mama, I felt him move the other day. At least I think it was him moving, just felt like little butterflies in my stomach," Bella places her hand on her baby bump. She is so in love with her child already. Hearing mothers say "I loved my child before it was even born" was something she thought was just crazy talk. But now…now she knows it's true, the one and only irrevocable truth.

"Him..." Mama turns her body on the sofa and looks wide-eyed over at Bella.

"Mmhmm, I think it's gonna be a boy," Bella answers with a gleaming smile.

"Well a mother's instinct is always right. Have you thought of any names?" Mama gently places her hand on Bella's rounding tummy.

"Not really, but I've always liked the name Anthony, though." Bella shrugs.

"Anthony, huh?." You can hear the smile in Mama's voice. "You do know Edward's middle name is Anthony right?"

"Yeah I know," Bella answers, playing with a piece of thread on her shirt and not meeting Mama's gaze. This was the first time Bella had mentioned to anyone of wanting to name her child, if it was a boy, after Edward. Even if Edward wasn't active in her pregnancy or in the baby's life for that matter. Bella wanted her child to have a piece of its father, be connected somehow to him, even if only by name.

Voicing this made her feel a little foolish and she was afraid of people's reaction towards the name she had chosen. After all Edward's put her through, she was still in love with him.

"It's alright sweetheart, I'm not judging you. You know I love my grandson more than life itself. I don't condone what he's doing or how he's treated you at all. I pray every day that he opens his eyes." Mama Esme's thin age-pocked hands squeeze Bella's hand tightly, their frail look betraying the strength that the old woman holds within her seventy-two year old body.

Mama is the strongest person Bella knows, not only has she had to stand by and watch her grandson lose himself to drugs, she's had to watch her first born - Elizabeth, Edward's mother, lose everything; her marriage, home, career, neglect her children and become the shell of the woman she once was.

"I hope that he realizes what he's thrown away before it's too late. I know you still love him and I know you're holding onto hope. I also know what it's like to be in love, how hard it is to turn it off. You do whatever feels right to you." Mama's soft-spoken words wash over Bella and cover her like a cloak.

Bella looks up at Mama and meets a pair of chocolate-brown eyes that hold nothing but love in them. Bella has come to love Mama Esme as her own grandmother, Mama is a source of comfort for Bella, a comfort that no one else has been able to give.

"Thank you, Mama." Bella leans in and gives her a hug, tears slip down her cheek. Taking a deep breath, Bella soaks up Mama's scent, she always smells like home to Bella. Fresh homemade bread is what she smells of and her body instantly relaxes.

"Hey you two, what's with the crying?" Rose asks as she walks into the living room.

"Hey, Rose, just being emo is all." Wiping her cheeks Bella smiles up at Rose.

Rose being only six years older than Edward and more like a sister to him, was always fun to be around. Rose would show up at their house out of the blue and take the kids, Bella and Tanya included, shopping, out to eat or cruise around in her truck just listening to the radio.

Rose also became a very good friend to Bella, she was the one person Bella would open up to about Edward. Bella could speak freely to Rose about loving Edward; her heartache and being terrified of being a single parent. Rose never judged; she never took sides, she was a shoulder for Bella to cry on.

"Yeah, pregnancy will tend to do that to you." Rose smirks and winks at Bella. "Let me just get changed real quick then we can leave."

.

.  
Bella, Mama, and Rose return from their outing at around seven-thirty that evening. After picking up her car from Mama and Rose's house, Bella heads home. The house is quiet. Turning off her car, Bella reaches to open her door when she hears her passenger door open and feels someone sit down. She freezes in place at the arrival of the uninvited, unidentified guest and curses her vehicle's manual locks.

Panic quickly triggers the flight or fight instinct. Her heart starts to beat rapidly and a wave of nausea assaults her, as she tries to recall all the lessons that Charlie has given her and her siblings over the years. Her mind is void of any lessons, all she can think about is how she's going to protect her unborn child.

"Where were you?" the intruder demands, venom and insecurity drip from the familiar voice.

Recognition causes Bella to slump in her seat and brace herself for Edward's inebriated interrogation.

"You scared the shit out of me, Edward! Fuck, I think I'm gonna be sick," she groans, jumping out of the car.

Placing her hand on the trunk, she empties her stomach. The delicious lunch she had now splattered on the concrete of her family's driveway. Edward was most definitely going to clean that shit up.

"B, I'm sorry…I didn't mean to scare you," Edward begins to rub Bella's back, gathering her hair in his other hand.

"Ugh…I really enjoyed that lunch."

"I'm sorry…Can I get you anything, water?" Edward whispers.

"Yeah, the hose, asshole." Bella grunts out "and hurry up. Clean this up before my dad comes home."

Edward trots around the side of the house and returns to quickly rid the drive of the contents of Bella's stomach. He returns the hose and makes his way back to Bella.

"Grab me a bottled water and napkins from the car, will ya?" she pants as a new wave of nausea comes.

Standing up from her hunched position, she clutches her stomach as she leans on the trunk trying to control her breathing.

"Here you go." Edward mumbles as he hands her the water. Noticing Bella's hand on her stomach Edward diverts his eyes to the ground. Bella's baby bump makes Edward's mistakes more tangible, it's like a slap in the face. Everything he's ever done to her comes rushing to the forefront of his mind.

Emmett's words tumble around in Edward's mind again; He's crushed Bella's heart by walking away when she most needed him. His older brother constantly reminded Edward that he has become just like his father by walking away from his family. At least Edward's father didn't abandon them before they were even born. Edward's stomach lurches at the thought of being a bigger asshole than his father. He's treated Bella the exact opposite of what he promised all those years ago.

"Thank you." Bella takes a drink to rinse out her mouth and watches Edward fight an internal battle. His body leans towards hers, his hands balled into fists at his side yet his feet are planted firmly in the ground, not allowing him to move an inch closer.

"What are you even doing here?" Bella sighs. Her body slumping against the trunk of the car. She's tired from her day and vomiting has taken a toll on her body. Edward is the last person she wants to be around at the moment. She has no strength left in her to fight with him and she knows that it's a fight he's looking for.

He's upset and jealous that she wasn't home, she can only imagine what ideas he's conjured up in his mind.

"I came by earlier and Tanya said you had a lunch date?" Edward shakes his head and lets out a humorless laugh.

"Um…Yeah I did actually," Bella answers curtly , not elaborating on who her lunch date was. It pisses her off that he would laugh at the thought of her having a lunch date. As if it wasn't possible.

Edward's eyes snap to Bella's. His neck turns red, the fury inching quickly across his face. His nostrils flare and his shoulders tense; Bella doesn't have to wait long for his outburst.

"What…" Edward growls out through clenched teeth, as he closes the gap and inches closer to Bella. Feeling his haggard breaths blowing on her face, the rise and fall of his chest against hers, her fingers twitch wanting to touch him. Refusing to let him affect her this way, Bella strengthens her resolve to prove to him, and herself, that she can and will continue without him.

"I said... I did have a lunch date." Holding his gaze, a shiver running down her spine. Playing this game with him isn't going to end very well.

"With who?" he asks, his voice laced with anger. "I asked you a question, Bella, answer me!" When she refuses to answer he continues."Who, B? Fucking tell me who. You think I wont find out, huh? When I find this mother fucker, I swear, I'll…"

Bella hardly recognizes the boy she knows and loves at this moment. Edward is wild...crazed and she's afraid...for him.

"You'll what Edward? Kick their ass...kill them? God, you're unbelievable. I shouldn't be surprised," Bella shakes her head. "You're so selfish, it's always about you! 'What's best for Edward, what does Edward want.' Do you ever stop and consider another person's feelings or wants?" Tasting the bile rise up in her throat again, her stomach tightens. This is exactly what she didn't want to happen—cause unnecessary stress on her and her baby.

"What's wrong if I had a lunch date? Is it that hard to imagine someone wanting to spend time with me?" Bella opens her arms wide at her sides. "Should I waste away pining over you? Is that what you want, huh?" jabbing a finger into his chest, "You don't want me, but no one else can either?"

"Why won't you answer my fucking question? Just answer me dammit!"

"It doesn't matter," Bella mutters, resignation clear in her voice. Looking away from Edward, she shakes her head. There's no sense in trying to talk to him now, he's angry and high. This can't go on; it's not healthy for her or her child. Bella knows the moment has come that she needs to make a decision...to remove him from her life.

"The hell it does." Edward places his hands on her cheeks and brings her face inches away from his. "It matters to me B. Does he know you have my baby inside you? That sick fuck is so hard up for a date that he's willing to go out with a pregnant chick," he sneers.

Looking at him, she scans his face, trying desperately to find a morsel of the boy she loves. But Edward has him so securely locked away that he's nowhere to be found.

"Fuck you, you asshole!" Placing her hands on his chest she pushes him, hard, "Who the hell do you take me for..." Bella chokes out "...leave Edward, please just leave."

"I'm not going anywhere. Look at me B," he grits out, tightening his hold on her.

Refusing to look at him, her tears begin to flow.

"Why…why are you doing this to me?" she whispers, "What did I ever do to you that was so wrong, that you feel the need to treat me this way, all these years, I've only ever loved you."

Finally looking up at him, she sees his cheeks stained with tears.

"I had lunch with Mama and Rose," giving him the answer he was waiting for.

"Why didn't you just say that?" Edward's eyes go wide as realization of what he'd just done sets in, "why would you let me think..." he says shaking his head.

"Edward, it doesn't matter who I had lunch with. You don't have a say one way or the other. You're not a part of my life, hell I don't know what we are to each other anymore. I need to move on. I can't sit here and dwell on the past, on what once was. I have to think of the future and how I'm going to make a life for me and my child. I need to learn to live without you."

"No, I…I won't let you." Edward stumbles on his words. The look on Bella's face tells him she's serious, she's walking away, this time for real.

Feeling his palms begin to sweat; his breathing becomes ragged, she can see he's losing control. Panic clear in his stuttering voice, his eyes are darting all over Bella's face. As if he's trying desperately to come up with something to convince her otherwise, call her bluff.

Her heart is screaming at her, "Comfort him you idiot, don't you see we've hurt our love!" It's hard for her to take a breath, feeling as though she's drowning in her own emotions. Wanting to take Edward in her arms and comfort him, whisper her apologies and love, it was never her intention to hurt him. She loves him so much.

But it's not just her anymore, her world doesn't revolve around Edward. She has a child to think of, this strengthens her resolve; she knows she's making the right decision.

"You're not good for me, Edward..." placing a hand on her stomach "...for us." Straightening her back, she locks eyes with him. These last words she speaks will not only break Edward's heart, they're going to crush hers.

"You don't have a choice... I don't want you in my life—I'm choosing now and I'm choosing me."

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N:**

**So...There ya have it, Bella finally told E to take a hike. What do you all think? Will this push him to sober up? Thank you for reading, see ya'll next time.**

**My posting schedule will be changing, these next few months will be extremely busy for me, work,school and football practice. I will be going from posting twice a week to only once a week on Tuesday's.**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there.**

** groups/469619903102273/**

**Rec time:**

**New Contest!**

**Twific- textmessagelolcontest- search under author  
also visit the blog at - .com**

**We bring you the funniest text message, iPhone fail, Auto correct fail and just plain old crazy LOL Fic's.**

**It can be any pairing, any 'ward, any 'ella, wolves, vamps, AH, AU, ANYTHING. As long as your OS has somewhere in the story line an auto correct fail, text message fail and most important it needs to be funny as hell ;)**

**Get creative! We want it all!**

* * *

**The Voting Poll is up for the TwiHEAcontest! Hurry! Run! Go Vote for your favorite OS!**


	17. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, cutestkidsmom, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

****_Chapter sixteen_:

_January 2012_

As she sat in the middle of her bed and strummed her guitar, Bella's mind wandered over to Edward. It had been about a week since Edward declared himself Bella's boyfriend and neither one of them had said a word about it. Bella wasn't sure what to do, should she ask him if he was serious about wanting to date her or should she wait till he brought it up.

"Whatcha doin'?" Tanya asked as she plopped herself on Bella's bed.

"Umm, playing my guitar." Bella rolled her eyes and held up her guitar.

"What're you doing?"

"Nothin', just got back from a movie with James." Tanya smiled up at Bella.

"Yeah, that's nice—" matching her sister's smile "—How are things with you and James, you happy, he treating you okay?"

It had been a while since they had talked. Tanya was always with James on her free time and Bella the same with Edward. It was nice to finally have some sister time, Bella missed it.

"Sissy, I think I'm falling in love with him." Tanya looked at Bella with a dreamy expression as she rolled over on her stomach and clutched one of Bella's pillows. "He's just…God he's everything. He's freaking fine, funny, sweet and I love spending time with him. Things are great between us, he treats me wonderfully. I never imagined having a boyfriend would be this amazing!" Tanya gushed out as she buried her head in the pillow.

"That's awesome, Tan. I'm so happy for you," Bella said with a giggle. Tanya always had a flair for the dramatic. Bella loved watching Tanya explain things, her theatrics were so entertaining.

"So…what's this I hear about you having a boyfriend, huh?" Tanya asked with a raised eyebrow. "What did they say his name was?" She tapped her temple. "AH! Yes, I do believe his name is none other than Edward Cullen."

"Um…who…um..." Bella sputtered her eyes snapping up from the fret-board of her guitar. She stared at her sister with wide eyes...she was so busted.

"Who said this?" Bella cleared her throat.

"It's so true isn't it?" Tanya sat up and flung the pillow at Bella's head. "Why didn't you tell me? I had to find out from James. You know how stupid I felt? Here I am going on and on about how we tell each other everything and how we would never lie to each other." Tanya waved her hands in the air frantically "Then I get slapped in the face with that news! I couldn't believe it, I even called James a liar! I was so pissed that he could even suggest that my sister would hold out on me. But he swore it was the truth, he said he heard it right out of Edward's mouth. He told me to ask you if I didn't believe him."

"Um…Edward told James?" Bella sat her guitar down and began pacing the room.

"You're avoiding the question sister!"

"Tan, look." Bella blew out breath. "Okay look… um…okay fine, yes, Edward asked me last week when we went to pick up Aunt Connie at the train station," Bella muttered, avoiding Tanya's gaze.

"AHHHHH!" Tanya shrieked as she threw herself back on the bed and covered her head with a pillow.

"Tan, I didn't say anything, well because, I wasn't sure about it myself." Bella climbed back onto the bed, removing the pillow off her sister's head.

"But since Edwards already telling people," she pointed out. "Yes, Edward is my boyfriend, I'm sorry I didn't tell you." She stared apologetically into her sister's eyes.

Bella recounted the details of that night to her sister.

"He didn't really ask me so much as told me that he was my boyfriend." Bella laughed.

"What…holy shit! That's hilarious." Tanya sat up and went into a fit of laughter. "He did not, what did he say, 'I'm your boyfriend' and that's final?" Tanya said imitating a manly voice.

"Well, yeah… not those words exactly, but somethin' along those lines."

"O-M-G" Tanya fell over laughing again. "I can't breathe…I can so picture him doing that," she said as she wiped at her eyes.

"And you just said yes!"

"What else was I supposed to say?" Bella groaned as she plopped down beside her sister on the bed. "Did you know he's asked me to be his girlfriend before and I've always said no? I like him Tan." Turning her head and looking at her sister. "Not like he's my best friend like him. I mean really like him."

"So kinda like 'you would totally have sex with him' like him?" Bella felt her cheeks heating up with her sister's question.

"OH MY FREAKING…HOLY HELL! You're so going to have sex with Edward! Oh my gosh, I can't believe this, I don't know why I'm so happy over this." Tanya reached over and hugged Bella. "You're gonna give your virginity to your best friend." Tanya sighed loudly. "If that's not romantic then I don't know what is."

"How did this conversation end up being about sex and Edward?" Bella covered her face in embarrassment.

"Oh God, now when I see him that's all I'm going to think about!" Bella shrieked.

"So, I take it mom and dad don't know yet?" Tanya asked.

.

.

.

"So…what're your plans for Saturday?" Edward asked Bella as they made their way to 7-Eleven. Bella was in the mood for a Big Gulp and some nachos.

"Saturday, nothing, why what's on Saturday?" She furrowed her brows and looked over at him. She racked her brain, did she forget something was happening on Saturday?

"Saturday is the day I'll be taking you on our first official date." Edward winked at her as he stubbed out his cigarette.

"Our first date, huh? I was thinking you were second guessing asking me to be your girlfriend, E." Bella smirked. She was hiding her excitement, she didn't want to seem like those girls that squealed and gushed all over their boyfriends. Even though that's exactly what she wanted to do.

"Why's that?" Edward asked with a tilt of his head as he guided them into the store.

"Well you haven't brought it up is all. I was thinking I had imagined the whole thing." Bella told him as she walked over to the counter to grab the nachos.

"You didn't imagine it, it was very real." Edward leaned in and whispered in her ear. He brushed her hair to the side. " I've wanted you forever, little love," he said as he skimmed his nose against the soft spot behind her ear and kissed her softly.

Bella inhaled sharply and looked up at Edward with wide eyes. She was speechless—stunned— her legs felt like Jell-O and her heart was racing a mile a minute. She had always been close with Edward; when they were together there was no such thing as personal space. But, the second she felt his breath on her neck and that kiss...it sent shivers down her spine, goose bumps all over her body. She wanted to melt into him.

"Don't look so surprised." Edward placed his finger under Bella's chin and pushed her mouth closed as he laughed through his nose. "Come on let's go eat these nachos." He grasped her hand and led them out the door.

"What's got you so quiet?" Edward asked as they walked to sit at a nearby park bench.

"Um…everything really, I just can't believe how much things have changed between us," Bella admitted.

"Like what?" Edward asked as they both sat down. He reached for Bella's hand and brought it to his lips.

"The only thing that's different is that I can do this now…" he kissed her knuckles "…and this…" he leaned in and kissed up her arm "…and this…" he trailed small kisses along her neck and jaw "…and the best change is this…" he grabbed her face in his hands, looked her in the eyes as he leaned in and gently kissed her lips.

The instant their lips met, all the air left her lungs. Bella couldn't quite wrap her mind around what was happening. Was she really kissing _her_ Edward, her best friend, the person she bore her soul to? How couldn't he see how big things had changed between them. Bella was brought out of her thoughts when she felt Edward's tongue trace her bottom lip.

"Open up for me, B," Edward murmured softly against her lips.

Closing her eyes, opening her mouth Bella allowed him entrance. His tongue swept in, softly circling hers. He tasted of mint and lingering flavor of cigarettes. Relishing in his warm breath as it washed over her face, gentle hands cupped her cheeks. Leaning into him, Bella placed her hands around his neck and lightly ran her fingers through his hair. Edward moaned into her mouth and he took her bottom lip between his, sucking on it gently.

"You see, little love," he whispered as they pulled away to catch their breath. "Things have only changed for the better, we're gonna be amazing together." He told her as he leaned in and kissed her one more time. "I love you, I promise I'll never hurt you."

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N:**

**AHHH! They finally kissed, how was it for you all? Thank you for sticking with me, see ya'll next time :)**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there.**

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	18. Chapter 18

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, cutestkidsmom, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

Chapter seventeen:

May 1st 2013

San Diego, famous for its sandy beaches , warm dry summers, and mild winters, is a beautiful place to live. It's been warm this past month, more so than usual, Bella has come to realize that pregnancy and heat are not a very good combination. She's had her share of restless nights due to her growing belly. Living in a city that is so close to the ocean is something that Bella has never been more grateful for. It never truly gets that hot, the breeze that rolls off the ocean keeps the residents and tourists cool.

Spring is in full bloom—one of Bella's favorite things to do when it starts to get warm is stop for ice cream. Bella is up and ready for work earlier than usual. Last night, she dreamt of ice cream. All day long she craved the rich decadence of her favorite spring and summer time indulgence—two scoops of mint chocolate chip. Out of the house and on her way to the cafe, Bella stops at the ice cream shop across the street from the Cafe to quench her desire. Savoring a spoonful she hears someone calling out her name.

"Bella…Bella…hey wait up!" Instantly familiar with the voice calling out to her, Bella's feet are frozen in place. It's not Edward's voice she's hearing, but for a split second she's afraid to turn around. Their voices just sound so damn similar.

"Hey…whatcha doing in this part of town?" she asks, turning to see Emmett jogging her way.

"Edward and I are at the tattoo shop up the street, I came over to grab some ice cream," Emmett says through panting breaths.

"Oh…" It had been over a week since that last time she'd seen Edward. Telling him she didn't want him in her life was the hardest thing Bella had ever done. It was as if she tore herself in two. Her heart ached like never before; she swore there was a hole burning in her chest.

This pain...it was worse than the heartbreak she experienced from Edward's initial rejection. She knew, on some level, that it was his vices talking. That knowledge did little to soothe her broken heart. Edward came looking for her a few days later, but Tanya turned him away, saying that Bella didn't want to see him. He texted her a few times begging forgiveness; Bella never replied.

Noticing Bella's faraway stare, Emmett rubs her shoulder, bringing Bella back to the present, "Don't worry B, he's in the chair for a while, he's getting his sleeve done," he says reassuringly.

"His sleeve," she asks, furrowing her brow. "Doesn't he have that done already?"

"He's getting the other arm done." he answered.

"Edward told me what happened." A flash of sadness crosses his features, knowing how much it took Bella to stand her ground with Edward. "He said you told him he wasn't good for you or the baby. I think you did good." Emmett winks at her and nods his head. "My little bro needs a swift kick in the ass to make him open his eyes. I think not having you there is gonna do that." Emmett has always vocalized his hope that Edward would clean up his act and do right by Bella and their child.

Not wanting to have this conversation, Bella nods her head in agreement; silently praying what Emmett just said is true, that walking away was the best for her and her child...for Edward.

Knowing his brother is a sore subject, Emmett changes it quickly. "So… what're you doing here, came for ice cream too?"

"Yeah, well...not just for the ice cream, I have some time to kill before I start work, so I figured some ice cream wouldn't hurt." Bella shrugs bringing a spoonful of ice cream to her mouth.

"You're performing today?" Emmett asks with a huge grin. Bella has denied his repeated requests to see her perform; now, he has her cornered and Bella can practically see the wheels turning in Emmett's head.

Shaking her head and holding her hands up as if it will hold back Emmett's thoughts, "Why are you smiling…OH NO! No, no, no, you're not coming to watch me, I love you, really I do. But…I don't want you there." Getting to a place where she was comfortable performing in front of an audience outside her family was hard for Bella. And now that she was, the last thing she wanted was to have her loved ones in the audience making her nervous.

"What…B, you wound me." Emmett places a hand over his heart. "I'll be as quiet as a mouse. You won't even notice I'm there. Please Bella…pretty please." He pulls out the big guns, giving Bella a quivering pout.

"Em, nothing you do is ever quiet. I can hear you snoring at night—and you live next door!" Bella giggles. "Besides, aren't you with your brother?" Her smile fades at the mention of Edward.

"Ehh…Don't sweat the small stuff, baby." Emmett shrugs placing his arm around Bella's shoulders. "That can easily be fixed, I'll just ride home with you."

"And what's Edward going to say? I don't want him there Em, please."

"You let me handle my little brother. I promise he won't be there." He uses his paw-sized hand to ruffle Bella's hair. "Don't worry that pretty little head of yours." Giving her a sloppy wet kiss on the cheek, Emmett moves down the sidewalk and away from Bella before she can react.

"Yes!" Emmett fists pumps the air. "I knew you couldn't resist this charm." He hollers over his shoulder.

"Ugh! Em, you don't ever listen to a word I say!" Bella stomps her foot wiping at her cheek ."What about your ice cream, didn't you say you came for ice cream?" she shouts at him.

Emmett turns and smiles at her. "Somethin' more important came up." he yells back.

.

.

.

"B, where are you!" Emmett shout. Bella groans from the stage where she's testing the mic and tuning her guitar. "Oh boy so much for him being quiet," she mutters.

Although he and Edward are brothers, they both couldn't be more different. Where Edward is quiet and hates to draw attention, Emmett is loud and boisterous. Emmett isn't someone who can walk into a room and blend in, no he demands attention. There's just something about him that people are instantly drawn too.

"Yo B, where do I sit," Emmett asks making his way to Bella.

"I thought you said you were gonna be as quiet as a mouse!" Bella snapped. "I knew this wasn't a good idea." Raking a hand through her hair. "You're gonna get me fired. I bet I just keel over and die of embarrassment." This was a running joke between them. Bella would always tease Emmett, saying that his loudness and jokes were going to be the death of her one day.

"Whatever…" Emmett rolls his eyes. "Why are you makin' such a big deal, no one's even here yet?" he says looking around, "besides, admit it B, what would you do without me, huh. Your life would be boring—grey—it's okay, you're in denial…one day you'll realize that 'Emmett Cullen' adds the color in your life."

Bella stared at Emmett, tears threatening her eyes, her lips quivered from holding in her laughter. "Are you done, oh colorful one?" Clutching her chest, she erupts into a fit of giggles. "Em how long have you rehearsed that, 'cause that shit was funny."

"Yeah, you laugh now, but one day when I'm gone, you'll see," he says pointing a finger at her. "Anyway…this is a pretty cool place here, B."

"Yeah it is, I really like it," Bella says as her giggles die down. "Alice and Jacob are fantastic, and the customers are such nice people. I'm really comfortable here."

"Alice…Jacob…?" Emmett asks.

"Alice is the manager and Jacob works the bar…speaking of the devil." Bella smiles as she looks up noticing Alice walking towards them.

"Bella hey, I thought I heard someone come in." Alice comes bouncing up to them.

"Hey Alice, yeah you did." Bella turns and gives Emmett a pointed look. "Alice…let me introduce you to Emmett, he's a very close, loud, friend. I've known him since I was ten," she says walking off the stage. "God I can't believe I've managed to stay your friend for so many years." Bella looks up at Emmett and winks.

"Hey now, don't trash talk me in front of a pretty lady, B, leave that for when it's just you and me." Emmett winks back at her. Alice's eyes are bouncing between Bella and Emmett, smiling at their playful banter.

"Emmett…this is Alice, the manager of this fine establishment." Bella gestures towards Alice.

"Don't pay no mind to this little one. I'm her best friend, her only friend." He extends his hand in greeting. "Alice, it's a pleasure to meet you." He shoots Alice that killer Cullen smile.

"Oh good lord." Bella whispers under her breath as she rolls her eyes. Bella knows that smile and knows exactly what it means. Emmett's eyes rake up and down Alice's body. Emmett's found something he likes and that something is Bella's boss.

"Emmett, the pleasure is all mine, believe me." Alice smiles coyly. "Bella you've held out on me, you've kept Emmett a secret," Alice says yet never taking her eyes off Emmett. "You never said you had a best friend this good looking."

"Yea B, what's up with that? You never told me your boss was this pretty little thing." Emmett leans in and kisses Alice's knuckles. Bella swore she heard Alice sigh. Emmett was indeed working his magic.

Bella fights the urge to scold him; he's relentless when he sees something he wants. Not that Emmett's a bad guy, he's a big ole teddy bear. Wears his heart on his sleeve, any girl would be lucky to have him. Bella just isn't sure that Alice should be that lucky girl. Alice is a force to be reckoned with and she would keep Emmett on his toes, that's for sure. Bella loved Alice, she just didn't want this to blow up in her face and be stuck in the middle or see anyone she cares about get hurt.

"O-M-G you guys are damn near eye fucking each other!" Bella hisses. "Emmett, behave or you can't stay." She points a finger in his face and glares at him.

Alice and Emmett turn their heads in Bella's direction, both wearing equally devilish grins.

"Why do I even waste my breath on him?" Bella shakes her head and turns to walk away.

"You came to watch Bella perform?" Alice looks at Emmett and claps her hands. "That's awesome! You can sit with me handsome and we can get to know each other better." She rubs her hand up and down Emmett's arm. "Let me go get us a table. A friend of Bella's is a friend of mine," Alice says walking away swaying her hips.

"Dammit…" Emmett whispers. "Fuck, B, I'm not a coffee drinker but I most definitely just became one." He runs a hand over his face.

"Whatever, Em, just don't do anything to embarrass me or get me fired! She's my boss." Bella slaps him playfully on the chest.

"Oh believe me there's nothing embarrassing about what I would love to do to that sweet little thing." Emmett wiggles his eyebrows. "Mmm…"

"Emmett! I don't want to hear about that." Bella walks back on stage laughing.

.

.

Bella opens up the night with one of her favorite songs,

_"I'm Gonna Make A Change,_

_For Once In My Life_

_It's Gonna Feel Real Good,_

_Gonna Make A Difference_

_Gonna Make It Right . . ."_

Over the past week Bella had put a lot of thought in what songs she was going to perform today. Michael Jackson's "Man in the Mirror" speaks volumes to Bella at the moment. Listening to it quite a bit this last week, it's helped her stay strong in her decision about keeping Edward away.

_"I've Been A Victim Of A Selfish_

_Kind Of Love It's Time That I Realize_

_That There Are Some With No_

_Home, Not A Nickel To Loan_

_Could It Be Really Me,_

_Pretending That They're Not_

_Alone?_

_A Willow Deeply Scarred,_

_Somebody's Broken Heart"_

A chill runs down Bella's back, the feeling of someone's heavy stare washes over her. Scanning the crowd Bella doesn't see anyone she recognizes other than the Cafe staff and Emmett. Could it be Edward, maybe he didn't go home like Emmett had said? Her heart starts to pound in her chest, her throat threatening to close, looking around frantically her eyes land on Emmett's concerned ones. He shakes his head, as if he knows what's going through her mind. Refusing to allow panic to consume her, Bella takes a deep breath to steady her breathing and she continues on.

_"And A Washed-Out Dream_

_They Follow The Pattern Of The Wind, Ya See_

_Cause They Got No Place To Be_

_That's Why I'm Starting With Me"_

Glancing one last time to the back of the cafe, Bella can see the flirting that's going on between Emmett and Alice. "Ok ladies and gentleman, I have a special treat for you all." Bella smiles into the audience, knowing Emmett's going to be pissed at her for doing this, but she can't seem to care at the moment. "I have someone very special to me here today, and I thought it would be awesome to have him come up and sing a song with me. Please give a warm welcome to Emmett Cullen!" Bella pulls away from the mic, hiding her giggles. There's no way she was going to pass up an opportunity to embarrass Emmett.

Emmett locks eyes with Bella, shooting her an angry piercing stare, his jaw hits the table. Oh yeah, he's most definitely pissed. Bella motions for Emmett to come up on stage. Shaking his head he mouths 'no way' while Alice claps, bouncing in her seat, cheering him on. He mumbles something as he gets up from the table and makes his way up to the stage.

"What the fuck," he snaps.

"That's what you get for coming here and hitting on my boss," Bella scolds him.

"What are we singing?" Emmett huffed.

Bella responds with a wicked grin, "James."

Shaking his head, a smile tugs at the edge of his lips. Bella knows all's forgiven when he places a stool next to hers. Emmett nods, recognizing the familiar opening chords of "You've got a Friend."

_"When you're down in troubles_

_And you need some love and care_

_And nothing, nothing is going right_

_Close your eyes and think of me_

_And soon I will be there_

_To brighten up even your darkest night"_

Looking over at Emmett, Bella motions for him to take the lead. Emmett brings the mic to his lips and lets the words flow. His voice is husky and has a hint of the blues. Closing her eyes she follows Emmett's lead as she strums her guitar to the rhythm of Emmett's voice.

_"You just call out my name_

_And you know wherever I am_

_I'll come running to see you again_

_Winter, spring, summer or fall_

_All you got to do is call_

_And I'll be there_

_Yes I will_

_You've got a friend"_

As Bella strums the last cords of the song, the crowd erupts in applause. Standing up, they hug each other. Emmett places a kiss on Bella's temple as they both whisper how much they care about each other. Bella truly loves Emmett; aside from her family, he's been one of the only constants in her life. Emmett will be an awesome uncle. Bella's extremely grateful that her child will have him in its life.

Whistling and cheers come from the back of the café. Bella knows it's Alice without even looking up. Shaking her head and laughing, Bella steps off the stage, heading over to the bar to grab a glass of water.

"I never thought I'd see you again," a gruff voice whispers in her ear. "You're more beautiful than I remember." Stunned with the sudden closeness and the whispered words in her ear, Bella turns around quickly.

Who she sees standing mere inches away from her takes her breath away.

"Jason…"

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N:**

**So, was Jason a surprise? Hope you all enjoyed Em and Bella.**

**Thank you for sticking with me, see ya'll next time :)**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there.**

**Rec time:**

**Hoodfabulous- ID# 3153041**

**I absolutely flove this author! Anything from her oozes awesomeness. Hurry and go read!**

* * *

**New Contest!**

**There are some aweosme stories up already!**

**Twific- textmessagelolcontest- search under author or ID#4617589**

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**We bring you the funniest text message, iPhone fail, Auto correct fail and just plain old crazy LOL Fic's.**

**It can be any pairing, any 'ward, any 'ella, wolves, vamps, AH, AU, ANYTHING. As long as your OS has somewhere in the story line an auto correct fail, text message fail and most important it needs to be funny as hell ;)**

**Get creative! We want it all!**


	19. Chapter 19

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, cutestkidsmom, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

Chapter eighteen:

_January 24, 2012_

It had been a few days since Edward mentioned he was talking Bella on a date. Her stomach flipped every time she thought about it and couldn't quite figure out why. Maybe it was having to tell her parents that she and Edward were more than friends now. Or was it her big brother finding out and possibly causing a scene? Why would he though? She had gone on dates before and besides that, Tanya was dating James and no one had a problem with it. Chocking it up to just plain old nerves—Edward was the first boy she had serious feelings for after all.

"Daddy and I are going to Seaport Village on Saturday," Renee said as she handed Bella a dish to dry. The Swans just had dinner and Bella was helping her mom clean up. "Mike is coming with Angela, you want to come with?"

Bella smiled when her mother mentioned Mike and Angela. Mike wasn't very social...he and Bella had that in common. When they made a friend it was for life and they both loved with such fierceness. When Mike introduced Angela to his family they were all thrilled, Angela was the first girl Mike had ever brought home.

"Umm…well I sorta have plans on Saturday," Bella answered her mother. Quickly looking away, trying to hide the blush that was creeping up her cheeks.

"Oh… you do, with who, Edward?" Renee asked.

"Uh huh." Bella nodded.

"Bella, honey…" Renee turns and grabs a dish cloth to dry her hands. "Is everything okay, you've been acting a little strange lately. Kinda jumpy, is there somethin' you want to tell me?" Renee looked into her daughters eyes, her children failed to realize that their mother knew them; she knew when they were being truthful, when they were sad, happy, when they were hiding something. And at that moment Renee knew without a doubt that her middle child was hiding something. Bella bit her lip every single time she lied, and could not, for the life of her, make eye contact. Besides that, Bella's blush was a dead giveaway.

Bella cleared her throat "Well, you see…Edw—"

"Bella! Edwards here," Charlie shouted.

Looking up at her mom, she felt a sudden rush of relief. She couldn't understand why it was so hard to tell her parents. They loved Edward, surely they would be happy to see her with him. If only she could work up enough nerve to tell them.

"Coming… tell him I'll be right there," Bella yelled back. "We'll talk later Mama, I promise." Leaning in she kissed her mother's cheek before she darted out of the kitchen.

Walking into the living room she looked at Edward sitting on the sofa with Charlie. "Let's go in the backyard, it's nice outside." Edward was about to argue, when Bella widened her eyes, giving him her 'look' that meant he should follow and not argue.

"Okay…well Charlie, it was nice chattin' with ya." Edward stood up. "I'll be outside enjoying the sun." Widening his eyes as he looked back at Bella.

"Mmhmm" Charlie grumbled never taking his eyes off the TV.

"What is up with you?" Edward asked following her into the backyard. " Aren't we gonna sit—here?" He points at the bench he assumed Bella was walking towards.

Shaking her head, Bella headed towards an oak tree that was in the furthest corner of her backyard, far away from prying ears. She needed to talk with Edward and couldn't risk her mom eavesdropping. Turning around she faced Edward and plopped herself on the ground, patting the spot next to her, indicating that he should sit.

"Hey…what's wrong, you're acting weird." Sitting down he grabbed her hand and tugged gently to get her attention. "Is it about us being together—are you freaking out?" He ran a hand through his hair.

"Edwa—"Bella began to say.

The way Bella was acting had him on edge. Not sure whether he had done something wrong or maybe she was regretting getting together with him? "It is about us isn't it—you're gonna break-up with me?" he asked nervously.

"Edward!" She pinched his leg. "Will you shut up for one minute and let me talk," she ordered.

"Ow! Dammit B, you pulled hair—that shit hurt!" he hissed.

"Well you're rambling and not letting me talk. I had to get your attention somehow," she said with a shrug.

"What do you want to talk about that's so important." Edward leaned back against the tree.

"We have to tell my parents that we're together." She looked up at him and blushed slightly.

"Okay, so tell them then." He looked at her like she was crazy. Why was she making a big deal out of this? It wasn't like he was a stranger; Charlie and Renee knew him, they knew his family. He was certain they would be thrilled.

"No…" she shook her head. "WE are going to tell them," she told him.

Slumping against the tree she sighed. "I don't know Edward, I just feel like—I don't know what I feel, why is this so hard for me?" she whined.

"What? What's hard, telling your parents about us?" Edward turned his body towards Bella. "Love, look at me." He placed a hand on her thigh.

When her eyes met his, he searched her face for regret—for an explanation to her nervousness. All he found was Bella's scared eyes looking back at him.

"What's got you so scared," he asked her. "Talk to me."

"I'm nervous about what my parents are gonna say, what if they don't approve?" She entwined their fingers.

"Why wouldn't they approve— I've never given them a reason not to trust me." Placing a finger under her chin, he tilted her head to look into her eyes. "We've been best friends for almost eight years now; I think you're over thinking this whole thing." He shook his head.

"Come on." He stood up and reached out for her. "Let's go tell them now—together—we're in this together, remember." He pulled her up. "You're not alone." Cradling her head in his hands. "It's you and me, little love...you and me." Bending down slightly he placed a kiss on her lips.

.

.

Sitting in her living room with Edward, her parents staring at them with curious expressions was a bit awkward. Bella fidgeted, wrung her hands and opened and closed her mouth several times, but nothing would come out. Edward turned and shook his head, letting her know there's no reason for her nervousness.

"Bella, honey, are you okay? You're scaring me." Renee looked over at her daughter, concern clear in her eyes.

"Baby girl…um…" Charlie ran a hand down his face, biting the end of his mustache, a clear sign that Charlie Swan was nervous. "Whatever it is, you can tell us, we will support you, baby...are you pregnant?" Charlie's eyes were as wide as saucers as he asked this; he reached his hand over to his wife's and squeezed it tightly waiting for his daughters reply.

"What!" Bella jumped up. "Wh…why would you ev…even think that?" she sputtered. Looking at Edward for a little help, he stood up and placed a hand on the small of her back, bringing her closer to him, hoping that it would calm her down.

"Charlie, Renee—Bella's not pregnant," Edward stated.

"Oh thank God!" Both of Bella's parents visibly relaxed.

"What Bella and I want to talk to you about is—well—you see, I asked Bella to be my girlfriend and she said yes," Edward said, looking at Bella's parents with a smile on his face. Charlie leaned back into the sofa and brought his arms across his chest, a smile tugging at the end of his mustache. Renee had a blank expression; she just stared at the couple in front of her.

"Oh…" was all Renee said, her eyes shifting from Edward's face to Bella's.

"So...yeah, Edward and I are together. That's all I wanted to say," Bella gushed out, pulling Edward with her towards the door.

"Not so fast young lady," Charlie called out. "Both of you sit down, there's some explaining you have to do."

Stopping at the door, they both turn and look at each other, Bella grips Edwards hand as he leads them over to the couch.

"So, when did this become more than just friendship?" Charlie arched his eyebrow.

"Just recently, Daddy, Edward only asked me about a week ago," Bella answered.

"That's not what I'm asking Bella, all this time you both spend together." Charlie waved a hand in the air. "Has it been more than just hanging out?"

Renee gasped as she brought a hand to her chest and shook her head. "I don't like this," she said.

Edward and Bella both looked at each other, hurt flashed across Edwards face at Renee's disapproval. Bella felt nothing but anger, angry that her parents would act this way towards her and Edward's relationship. That Charlie would insinuate that Bella had been dishonest with them, how could they think that Edward would disrespect them in that way. How could they throw these accusations so freely, did they not know their daughter, the type of person she was? Why…why was it not okay for Bella and Edward, but perfectly fine for Tanya and James?

"What is there not to like, Mama," Bella snapped. "And Daddy how dare you imply that Edward and I have been sneaking behind everyone's back! Don't you know me—him..." Bella pointed a finger in Edwards's direction "…At all?"

Charlie rose from the couch to his full height and shot Bella a stern gaze. "Now, you apologize to your mother for speaking to her like that," he ordered. "I will not have you yelling at us Bella, all I'm asking is to understand,what this all means, every parent would ask these questions."

Charlie turned and looked Edward dead in the eyes. "You and I are gonna have a little talk, son." He pointed a finger towards the couch. "Both of you sit."

"Now, I understand how close you both have been over the years, and quite frankly I always knew there was a chance that you two would be more than just friends," Charlie said as he sat back down. "I guess it's time we acknowledge that." Turning and looking at Renee, Charlie gave her a nod.

Taking a deep, Renee shook her head. "I don't think that you two are thinking things through. What if this is just a fling and your relationship as friends suffers. What then?" Renee looked intently at Bella. "Are you willing to risk years' worth of friendship—are you both positive this is what you want?"

"Renee, Charlie—I have loved B, since the moment she said 'hello' to me all those years ago in 6th grade. She's been my best friend—my soul mate—I can't imagine my life without her in it." Reaching over he grabbed Bella's hand and entwined their fingers. "I have never disrespected your daughter in any way, we've been nothing but friends, and if that was the way Bella would have wanted to stay—then that's what we would be." Edward squeezed her hand, his gorgeous crooked grin tugging at the corner of his lips.

"Edward hasn't pressured me, Mama, into this relationship," Bella spoke up. "I want to be with him, we love each other," she stated, looking up at Edward and smiling at him.

Clearing his throat, Charlie scooted to the edge of the sofa. "Well…now that things have changed, I guess we need to lay down some ground rules."

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N:**

**So who seen those reactions coming from Bella's parents? **

**A little insight into my RL, my parents reacted similar to Charlie and Renee. My mother wasn't happy at all, when the hubs went and told them he had asked me to be his girlfriend. Only difference is... I sent him in there alone... I was to chicken shit to go with him, lol :)**

**Thank you for sticking with me, see ya'll next time :)**

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	20. Chapter 20

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

_Chapter nineteen:_

_May 1, 2013_

"Jason...what are you doing here, I thought you moved to New York?" Bella's stunned, the last time she had seen Jason was about two years ago. The summer before he went off to college, he had taken her out to dinner and a movie. They kept in contact for a few months after he left, but Bella stopped answering his calls and texts when she and Edward got together.

"I did, I still am." He smiles at her. "It's been awhile, how are you?" Shoving his hands in his pockets, he asks, "Why did you stop answering my calls, my texts? Did I do something wrong or offend you?"

Shaking her head, Bella takes a deep breath. Did she really want to have this conversation with Jason? Explain why or, better yet, _who_, was the reason she pulled away. Bella had never been embarrassed of her love for Edward. Back then she would have probably screamed it from rooftops. But here, in front of Jason—the one boy who held her interest outside of Edward—she was embarrassed. Embarrassed at what had become of her life.

Flashes of the past two years assault her memory; all she has done is love a man. A man who she was forced to share...a man who didn't put her first...a man who she thought loved her the most. She was wrong. Drugs were, and continue to be, the other woman.

At times Bella wonders if it would have been easier if she had found Edward with another woman. It certainly would have made it easier for her to walk away if she had. But... with his addiction, it was something she couldn't understand, how can someone chose a drug over their love, their heart. Bella was fighting a world class heavyweight; she didn't stand a chance against the drugs.

"Bella, are you alright?" Jason places a hand on her shoulder. "Where'd you go, you got lost in your thoughts there for a minute."

Reaching up to touch his hand, she looks into his eyes— his beautiful blue eyes— the way they look back at her, like she can bare her darkest secrets and not be judged. It's then she realizes that she's missed Jason, his friendship, his caring smile.

"Yes…yes I'm fine." She answers as she pushes away all thoughts of Edward. "I was just thinking about the last time we saw each other." She smiles up at him.

"Can I get a hug now?" He asks as he opens up his arms. The moment he recognized her on stage he fought the urge to run to her and scoop her into his arms. Why...why had she just stopped all contact? He had beaten himself up trying to come up with a reason for her sudden departure from his life. Eventually, he just let it be and figured she had her reason. In all the time that had passed, his number remained the same in hopes that if she ever wanted to talk, all she had to do was pick up the phone.

Staring at his outstretched arms, she wavers in her response. Suddenly self-conscious of her growing belly. Everybody else in her life knows about the baby, but Jason... if he feels the firmness of her belly, it will force her to have a conversation she would rather not have at all.

Edward's harsh words linger in the back of her mind— _"Does he know you have my baby inside you? That sick fuck is so hard up for a date that he's willing to go out with a pregnant chick."_ Is it true, will no one want her because she's a single mother. Is she no longer worthy of a mans love? She's still attracted to Jason on some level...misses their friendship, but Edward keeps mucking up her thoughts, spoiling the little bit of peace she has even without him physically being here.

Although Bella felt big and uncomfortable at just eighteen weeks of pregnancy, she was far from it. She had barely gained ten pounds; just last month she switched out her regular jeans for maternity ones, cute peasant tops, and comfy flats.

"We haven't seen each other in two years...say you haven't missed me." He cocks his head to the side and smirks.

Stepping into his awaiting arms, Bella wraps hers around his neck. Jason cocoons her body with his massive arms and brings her tightly against his chest. Nuzzling her hair behind her ear, he breathes in her scent.

"I've missed you," he whispers.

Hugging him tighter is her only reply.

A throat clearing behind them causes Bella to stiffen.. Stepping back, Bella turns around to find a scowling Emmett. His usual happy eyes are replaced with ones of anger and hatred. Dread instantly washes over her, when she realizes the look that's staring back at her. It's the same angry look Edward gets in his eyes. Terrified Emmett will cause a scene, she steps away from Jason and walks over to Emmett's side.

"Care to introduce me to your friend, B?" Emmett folds his arms across his chest. Already a physically imposing figure, Bella notices Emmett straighten his back and puff out his chest, making himself even larger and more intimidating.

Clearing his throat, Jason steps up and offers his hand in greeting. "I'm sorry, Bro, I wasn't aware Bella was here with someone. The name's Jason. Bella and I used to work together in the mall a few years back. We became good friends—wouldn't you say, Bella?" With his tone alone, Jason leaves no question about his and Bella's past—although there isn't much to it. Jason knows what he's doing, he isn't intimidated by Emmett. He's just adding more fuel to the ever growing fire inside of Emmett Cullen. Both men sizing each other up, refusing to release each other's grip and never breaking the intense gaze they're locked into.

"Jason, this is Emmett. A very close friend of mine," Bella says.

"Yeah, B and I have known each other since we were just kids. My little Bro is her boyfriend—funny thing is—" Emmett arches a brow at Bella, "Bella's never mentioned you before?"

"Emmett," Bella hisses.

Jason releases Emmett's grip and steps back turning to Bella. "Well, it was nice seeing you again, Bella. I hope we can catch up sometime. I'll be in town for a while." Looking at Emmett, Jason leans down and kisses Bella's cheek. "My number is still the same, hit me up sometime." He winks and casually sits down at the bar.

"What the fuck is wro—" Emmett growls stepping forward. His tirade is interrupted when they hear Alice behind them.

"I see you've met my cousin," Alice says smiling at the sight before her.

"No way," Emmett grumbles. "This dude." He points with his thumb. "Is your cousin, sweet cheeks?"

"Really..." Bella's mouth falls open in surprise, "Alice is your cousin?"

"Yes ma'am, she's my little pixie." Walking over to Alice, Jason hugs her and places a kiss on her temple.

"Ain't this a bitch?" Emmett shakes his head and lets out a humorless laugh.

"What is wrong with you?" Bella growls out through clenched teeth.

"What," Emmett looks at her with innocent eyes. "What'd I say?"

"You know damn well what you said." Bella narrows her eyes, steps in closer and points a finger in Emmett's face. Causing him to take a step back. "Stop being a jackass. You don't even know Jason, why are you judging him already?"

Folding his arms across his chest, Emmett looks at Bella and grunts. "You two looked pretty well acquainted if ya ask me."

"Well I'm not asking you." Bella arches a brow. "Now shut up before Alice hears you. Be a good boy and play nice. Just like you were taught in school." Bella pats him on the shoulder. "You remember school right, Em?"

"Haha, very funny smart stuff." Emmett rolls his eyes. "Wait till my bro hears about this," he whispers.

"Why th—"

"Hey you two, what's with all the whispering?" Alice interrupts Bella. "So Bella, you and my cousin know each other?" Alice asks. A curious gleam in her eye as her gaze darts between Jason and Bella. "That's so awesome." This is a perfect opportunity for Alice to set Bella up, help her take her mind off Edward, and have some fun. "We can all go out together sometime." Clapping her hands Alice bounces on her feet.

"That's a brilliant idea, Pixie," Jason says smiling as he wraps an arm around Alice's shoulder. Knowing that once his cousin finds out that the girl he's spoken about all these years is Bella, the matchmaker in Alice will come out to play. "Bella and I have some catching up to do."

"Su..sure, I would love to hang out," Bella says, a knot forming in the pit of her stomach.

Bella's mind instantly snaps to her former best friend. What if Edward finds out that Jason is in town and wants to see her. Edward wasn't a fan of Jason's. The last encounter they had wasn't all that pleasant. There's no telling what Edward would do now.

Why was she feeling guilty about going out with friends? They were done, Edward has no claim over her anymore; maybe if she keeps repeating this over and over, her heart will finally realize Edward was no longer theirs to love. They have to let go of their need for Edward and live without his influence in their life. Edward can't dictate who she's friends with, and whom she chooses to spend her time.

"Well it's getting late, I should get Bella home," Emmett states, stepping closer to Alice, he squeezes her hand. "Alice it was a pleasure meeting you. I hope to see you soon." Leaning down, he kisses her cheek.

Alice turns her head and brushes her lips against Emmett's. Cupping his cheek in her hand, she looks up at him with such tenderness. Alice is completely enamored with Emmett. The way Emmett is looking back at her, it seems he's just as smitten with Alice. She's never had feelings this strong for someone she'd just meet. All she knows for certain is that she has to see him again. "I would love that very much," she says with a smile.

.

.

May 3, 2013

Sitting in the waiting area of her doctor's office is torture. Bella has been looking forward to this day since her last appointment, a month ago. Today, she will find out the sex of her baby.

Sitting next to her, Renee and Tanya's excitement radiates. Renee was certain Bella was carrying a boy. Bella was glowing and, according to Nana Marie, Renee's mother, a woman glows when she's pregnant with a boy. Tanya had been praying for a girl, telling Bella that she wanted to have a little princess to dress up and parade around the neighborhood. Of course Charlie and Mike both voiced that they both hoped it was a boy, and already talked football and coaching.

Renee squeezes Bella's hand. " Aren't you excited, we can finally pick a name for the baby. I can start buying clothes!" she gushes out.

"I can't wait, Mama. I couldn't sleep last night because I was so excited." Bella smiles at her mom.

"If it's a girl, I think she should be named after her favorite aunt," Tanya chimes in.

"You're the baby's only aunt, Tan." Renee shakes her head and laughs.

"Exactly, and she's going to love me. Wouldn't it be cool if we named her after me? I can buy us matching outfits—we would look fabulous!" Tanya exclaims.

"O-M-G, my sister has finally lost it." Bella laughs at her sisters dramatics.

"Isabella Swan,"a nurse calls.

Standing up, Bella tells her mother and sister that she will have a nurse come get them when the ultrasound is going to be performed.

"How are you feeling Isabella," the nurse asks.

"Good, thank you."

The exam goes quickly. Bella's weight, blood pressure, and urine are checked. The doctor takes a few measurements and pokes and presses on her belly before finally telling her that the pregnancy is right on track and the baby is growing well.

"Okay little mama, I take it since we have grandma and auntie here, you all would like to know the sex of the baby," the doctor asks with a smile after Renee and Tanya enter the room.

"Yes, please," Bella answers.

"Lets see if he or she will let us peek at the private parts." Looking at the screen Bella is mesmerized at the sight before her eyes. Her baby is moving, it looks like a little person already.

"So, this is a leg and foot." The doctor points to the screen. "I'm going to take some measurements, just to make sure the baby is as big as it should be at this point in the pregnancy. Hopefully it'll move around some, and give me a chance to peek between their legs."

"Oh, I think the little one heard me," the doctor says. "Look at that there." Smiling down at Bella the doctor asks, "So do you have a name picked out for a boy."

The three Swan women gasp and sigh at the doctor's words.

"I knew it, honey. I told you it was a boy." Renee leans in and kisses Bella on the cheek.

"A boy, Mama. I'm having a boy," Bella whispers as tears slip down her face. A baby boy...her Anthony was coming into the world. Placing a hand on her tummy, she closes her eyes and whispers internally how much she already loves him. Then she makes a vow...a vow to her son: she will be a strong woman, she will move heaven and earth to provide a good life for him, and she will become a mother he can be proud of.

"Congratulations. I'll leave you to get dressed. See the nurse before you leave to schedule your next appointment."

"Thank you, doctor."

"I can't wait to call Daddy and Mike. They're going to be jumping out of their skin with excitement," Tanya says.

"So, have you thought of a name for a boy?" Renee asks Bella.

"Yeah, I have," Bella answers with a smile.

"Well what is it then?" Tanya rolls her eyes.

"Anthony."

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N:**

**So...how are you feeling about Jason? Emmett's reaction to him? How many of you guessed she was having a boy? **

**Thank you for sticking with me, see ya'll next time :)**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there.**

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	21. Chapter 21

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

_Chapter twenty:_

_April 2012_

Senior year for Bella and Edward was coming to an end. They would both turn eighteen next month and graduate in June. Adulthood was a topic Edward brought up quite often.

"I'm gonna move out when I turn eighteen," Edward said, while lounging on a hammock in Bella's backyard. Edward's arm wrapped around Bella's shoulder, and her head rested on his chest. He ran the pads of his fingers along the arm she had draped over his stomach. "I already spoke to my dad about it, he said as long as I have a part-time job and continue going to school, he'll help pay for my expenses."

Not really paying attention to him, Bella just hummed in response. Edward had been talking about moving out for months. Bella had voiced her concerns and tried to talk him into moving in with his grandmother instead. Edward wasn't having that. He was determined to be out on his own.

Growing tired of living with his mother and having to sit idly by and watch her destroy herself. Elizabeth only worried about herself: where her next high would come from and who would be warming her bed that evening. The money she received in child support would go to drugs and partying. She never worried if her children had food, clean clothes, or if the utilities were paid. Edward was tired of living this way, but he refused to live with his father. Too many rules came along with living in Carlisle Cullen's home. Moving out on his own seemed to be Edward's only logical alternative.

Would her parents allow her over to Edward's place once he lived alone? Well, she would be eighteen by then; they couldn't really forbid her to do anything anymore. But, she was still living in their home. "I don't care if you're forty, as long as you live under my roof, you WILL follow my rules." Her father once told her brother, Mike.

"…can move in with me?"

Lost in her own thoughts, she had only caught the tail end of what Edward had said.

She looked up at him confused. "Hmm…what? Who can move in with you?"

"Did you not hear a word I just said?" Edward laughed. "You're enjoying my arm rub a little too much, love." Leaning in, he kissed her lips.

Bella hummed in agreement. "It always puts me to sleep. It's like I'm in a trance."

"Good to know, I wasn't sure if it was working." He smiled playfully down at her. If anyone was in a trance it was Edward. He was so in love with her it hurt. After so many years of just being her friend—at arms length, in a way—to know he can freely hug and kiss her was liberating. It seemed he couldn't get close enough.

Shaking her head, Bella laughed at him. "Shut it," she said as she pinched his side.

"Okay, okay…" Edward laughed as he grabbed at her wrist to stop her from pinching him any further. "What I was saying was…that once I find my place and get settled in, you can move in with me."

"What about school, I'll be in school full-time come September. I won't have time for a job. Besides that, you really think my parents are gonna let me leave—let me move in with you?" Bella's voice rising in panic with each statement. Her constant worry about what her parents would think, what they would say was a source of frustration for Edward.

She tried to be more like Tanya―act before she thought―worry about the consequences later. But, that wasn't Bella. No, she was a worrier by nature. Being the eldest daughter came with responsibilities...expectations. Living in the moment―flying by the seat of her pants―wasn't an option for Bella. Disappointing her parents was the last thing she wanted to do.

Bella had been accepted into the University of California, San Diego. The day she received her acceptance letter was the proudest moment in her life. She ran into her backyard and screamed over the fence for Edward. He was so proud of her, all her hard work was finally paying off.

Unfortunately Edward hadn't been accepted into any university, but not because he didn't make the grades. No, Edward Cullen was as stubborn as a mule; he wasn't accepted anywhere because he didn't apply. No matter how much Bella begged him to fill out applications with her, he didn't change his mind. She even went as far as filling them out for him, then all he needed to do was sign them. He wasn't sure what he wanted to do in life. Edward had decided he would take classes at the local community college and try to figure things out.

"You'll be eighteen Bella—an adult. They can't forbid you to move out." Edward shook his head. She was weeks away from being eighteen, a legal adult to come and go as she saw fit. The fact that Edward's parents didn't parent him or his brothers at all, played a huge roll in his thought process. Elizabeth was too wrapped up in her drugs to care and Carlisle was too wrapped up in his new wife to worry. Edward was free to come and go since he was fourteen, not having to answer to anyone. He couldn't understand why Bella felt the need to ask her parents permission all the time.

"Yes, I know I'll be eighteen." Bella rolled her eyes. "But they will also be paying for college," Bella stated. "I can't just up and leave."

"Do you know what my dad's gonna say, huh?" Bella raised her eyebrows in question.

"I'll tell you exactly what he's gonna say. He will say that if I think I'm old enough to move out and live on my own, then I'm old enough to get a job and pay my way." Bella gushed out, her arms flailing.

"Well, you won't need a job. I'll be working and my dad will be helping me pay for bills," Edward informed her.

Burying her face in his chest, Bella mumbled, "Edward, I won't live off you and I refuse to leech off your dad." Turning her head to the side she asked, "What's the rush, why are you so eager to move in together. What are you afraid off?"

"I'm not afraid of anything, is it a crime to want to live with your girlfriend?" he asked defensively.

Bella could see the shift in his demeanor; she knew she had hit a nerve. Something was going on in Edward's head. He had not been himself the last few days. Something Edward said to her the day she got her acceptance letter from UCSD was lingering in the back of her mind. "Just don't up and drop me for a smart university boy," he had said.

Even though he laughed it off, his smile never reached his eyes. Edward had become very clingy as they got closer to graduation. Bella knew he had abandonment issues. The sudden divorce of his parents and then the mental departure of his mother caused him to fear being left behind.  
When they were fifteen, Edward had confided to Bella that he believed that no one truly stayed, he feared that everyone he ever loved would eventually abandon him.

Through the years, Bella and Edward spent every waking moment together. They went to school together and they even had all the same classes. Bella noticed Edward change when she started talking about college. Edward would talk about getting a job and living on his own instead. Now he was asking her to move in with him.

Not wanting to argue or continue talking about moving in together, Bella leaned in and kissed under Edward's chin. "Nope it's not a crime." Sitting up on her elbow she waved a hand in the air. "Let's not talk about this anymore. I want to talk about prom," she said, excitement gleamed in her eyes.

.

_May 2012_

"I don't wanna wear a tux," Edward whined.

They had been at this for hours. First they shopped for Bella's prom dress, which didn't take that long. The moment she saw the dress she knew it was the one. The color was perfect, just the right royal blue she was looking for. Edward, however, was a different story. There was something wrong with every single tux he tried on: it didn't fit right, the color was off, he didn't like the jacket. Bella finally snapped and screamed at him in front of the salesman.

"Just shut up and try the damn thing on, Edward," Bella yelled. "Look, if you don't want to go then just say so. Don't waste my time searching for a tux we will never find," Bella exclaimed as she threw her hands in the air."Obviously nothing you have tried on you like."

Desperately needing some fresh air, Bella picked up her purse and garment bag and walked out of the store, heading to a nearby bench to clear her thoughts. Edward followed minutes later and sat down next to her, neither one of them speaking.

"I'm sorry… I'm being a pain in the ass," Edward mumbled.

"Yeah, that's an understatement." Bella laughed humorlessly. Completely frustrated with his behavior—not just today—over the last few weeks.

"Edward look…if you don't want to go to prom with me then just tell me. No one is forcing you to go."

Grabbing her hand, he entwined their fingers. "I do want to go. I'm sorry I'm ruining this for you. I guess I just figured…" blowing out a breath, he ran a hand through his hair "…if I ignored all this, didn't go to prom, then it wouldn't be that final." If Edward was being completely honest with himself or Bella for that matter, he was terrified of her going off to college. Terrified that he wasn't going to be good enough for her, that she would find someone more on her level—educated. Someone who could offer her, what he couldn't.

"What do you mean final?" Bella looked over at him.

"Graduation—you going to college."

"Edward…look at me," Bella asked him. "Is this what all this is about, me going to college." She looked at him, waiting for him to answer.

Nodding his head, he shrugged his shoulders in agreement. "Why are you so upset over me going to college? It's not like I'm moving out of state, I'll still be here. We'll still be together. You have nothing to worry about."

How else could she tell him—show him, that he wasn't going to lose her. That he owned her heart, and even though she went off to college and he didn't, nothing was going to change how she felt about him. She was completely and irrevocably in love—he owned her heart, mind and soul.

"I know, I'm just scared of losing you, is all." He wrapped his arm around her waist and brought her close to his side. Kissing her hair, he continued, "I'll stop brooding, love, I promise. Let's go get that tux. I need to look halfway decent standing next to you."

Edward looked at her and whistled. "You look like absolute perfection in that dress." He leaned in and kissed behind her ear.

With Edward's tux finally picked out, they decided to go and have some dinner at Pizzeria Uno's before going home.

"So, what do you want to do for our birthday?" Edward asked Bella after they placed their order. Their birthdays were a few weeks away and Edward wanted to do something special, just for the two of them. They were turning eighteen after all.

"Oh…I had been meaning to tell you, my dad got 4 tickets to Disneyland, he said we should use them for our birthday." Bella smiled at him. "Do you wanna go?"

"Sure, I haven't been to Disney since my parents split, it'll be fun," he said. Relief coursed through him, he was so glad they weren't having a party.

"Yeah, I think so too, I was thinking about inviting Tanya and Jasper to come with."

"Sounds good, love, whatever you want to do."

"Okay, I'll let Tanya know. We'll go on your birthday, since it's on a Saturday," Bella stated.

.

_June 2012_

Prom, birthdays and graduation had come and gone. True to his word, Edward had found a studio apartment that wasn't too far away from Bella and his brothers. He was officially living on his own. The studio came fully furnished, with utilities included for only $400 a month.

Edward began working as a busboy at a steakhouse inside Barona Casino. A job he had found out about through his aunt Rosalie whose boyfriend worked at the casino. There was a job fair coming up, so she quickly told Edward. He applied and was interviewed that same day, he was hired almost on the spot. Working the swing shift was perfect for Edward, 4pm-12am. This allowed him time for a class or two in the middle of the day.

Renee and Charlie weren't too happy when they found out Edward moved out and Bella had been going over and visiting him. Charlie had actually threatened to take her car away and only allow her use of it for school.

"Bella, it's not that I don't trust you, but I've been a teenage boy—believe me when I tell you—I know exactly what's going through that mind of his." Charlie explained.

Luckily for Bella, Mike came to her rescue. "Pops, Bells is eighteen, you need to loosen the strings a little. If you don't, what's gonna happen is she'll sneak around to do it. You just said you trust her right? Then trust her to make the right decisions and let her have some freedom."

Charlie relented and gave Bella a curfew, but not without a warning. "If you so happen to walk into this house one minute past midnight, that car and your privileges will be taken away."

Needless to say, Bella practically lived at Edwards's apartment. When he wasn't working that's where they spent the majority of their time. Edward tried to spend every waking moment with her before she was to start school.

"Should we order some pizza, or do you want to go to McDonald's?" Edward asked.

"McDonald's sounds good. We can get a movie while we're out," Bella responded.

They spent the rest of their evening lounging on Edwards bed watching the two movies they had picked up.

Laying with her head on Edwards stomach, Bella turned over. "Edward, rub my back?" she asked.

Lifting her tank top, Edward began slow patterns across her back and down her sides. Bella closed her eyes and hummed in appreciation. There was nothing better than the feeling of Edward's fingers running across her skin.

Bella's moans were causing Edward's shorts to become very very tight. He brushed her hair to the side and leaned in and kissed her shoulder, which caused Bella to hum.

Sitting up slightly on his elbow he trailed his fingers down her ribs as he ran his nose across her shoulder. Kissing up her neck, Bella's body shivered in response.

"Edward.." she breathed out.

"Hmm?" He sucked on her earlobe. "I love you so fucking much, baby," he whispered.

"I love you too," she answered back.

"Soon, love, one day in the very near future, you're gonna stay here with me. That'll be the day I make love to you."

Bella and Edward had fooled around a lot, but Edward refused to have sex with her as long as she had to go home. He didn't want to rush things; he wanted to worship every single part of her body. He wanted it to be slow and sweet, have her in his arms all night and take care of her in the morning.

Closing her eyes, she focused on his hands running across her back and his breath fanning her face as she felt her self drift off.

The sudden urge to pee caused her to wake. She opened her eyes and was a little disoriented by her surroundings. She took in the room; and her heart began to race as reality set in.

"Shit, shit, shit..." She fumbled to reach for her phone. Edward's body pinned her down to the bed, not allowing her to move much.

"Edward, wake up. Oh my God, I'm in deep shit," She whimpered. It was close to one-thirty in the morning.

"My dad is gonna kill me―Edward!" She shook him hard. "Edward, you have to wake up," she cried, as panic began to set in. Bella was in deep shit, and she knew it. Charlie was going to take her car and possible never let her leave their home again. The trust her parents gave her, was being slapped right back in their faces.

"Hmmm..." he grumbled. "Bella...what's wrong?" he asked in a sleepy voice. "Bella..." Edward shot out of bed, his eyes wide as saucers. "Holy fuck, what time is it," he screamed.

"One thirty in the morning," she covered her face as she mumbled through her tears.

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N:**

**Oh no! What'da you think Renee and Charlie are going to do? **

**Thank you for sticking with me, see ya'll next time :)**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there.**

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	22. Chapter 22

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

_Chapter twenty one:_

_May 21, 2013_

Warm breath fans across her face, moist wet kisses trail down her cheek and behind her ear. "Happy Birthday, love," he murmurs. Soft whispered touches—hands ghosting across her stomach, trailing up her back, leaving their imprint—forever tattooed on her skin.

Bella hums at the feeling of his warm flesh touching hers—his beautiful voice singing in her ear, "Happy Birthday to you...Happy Birthday to my Bella...Happy Birthday to you..." his laughter echoes. "Come on, love, open those beautiful brown eyes for me, I know you're awake," he says, tickling her sides.

Giggling, she squirms a little. "Edward," she sighs as she opens her eyes, her vision a little blurry from sleep. Disappointment instantly takes over. Hurt, frustration and betrayal flows through her veins. A strangled sob sticks in the middle of her throat, it burns—burns down her chest, to the pit of her stomach. When is this ever going to end? She was so tired—physically and mentally—of putting on a brave face. What she really wanted to do was fall apart, cry, scream till she couldn't scream anymore. Instead she was psyching herself out, refusing to let herself mourn the loss of her love, her heart and most importantly her best friend.

Today is especially hard for Bella; it is her nineteenth birthday, and the first birthday in eight years that she doesn't have Edward by her side. Tears flow freely down her face. Why...why did things go so wrong? Why was her child robbed of his father before he was even born?

Hugging her stomach, Bella curls up and cries, apologizing to her unborn. "I'm sss..so sorry you're cheated o..ou..out of your dad...daddy. I'm so sorry I wasn't strong enough to love him through this," she cries. "I pray every day, baby boy, that your daddy will lo...love you enough t...too get better."

A soft knock on her bedroom door has her wiping at her cheeks. Mike pokes his head in and smiles at her. "Happy Birthday, little sister," he says, walking into her room. "Bella, what's wrong?" he asks, instantly noticing her bloodshot eyes and runny nose. "Is it the baby, should I call mom?"

"No, Mike, I'm baby is fine." She smiles at him. "I'm having a pity party. It's my party and I can cry if I want to, right?" She shrugs.

"What's up…why you crying?" He pats her leg as he sits down on the bed. "Do I need to kick someone's ass." Although he isn't the most involved brother, Mike loves his sisters. Like most older brothers, he threatened all the boys, and watched his sisters like a hawk. Bella and Tanya knew that all they needed to do was go to Mike and he would handle anything—threaten anyone— that ever messed with his baby sisters.

Edward was no exception. Mike had given Edward a piece of his mind when his fist connected with Edward's jaw. Mike was the first one to step up and defend his sister, as Bella's family watched her relationship unravel with Edward. Edward took the blows, never once sticking his hands up to defend himself. He knew he deserved this and much more, for all the pain he was causing. With every single punch he took, his heart and soul cried out to Bella, screaming how sorry he was. His heart tried reaching out to her, only to be pulled back in to be smothered, and locked away. As long as the drugs ran through his veins, there was no way he would ever feel love or happiness again.

"No," Bella answers, a small smile tugs at her lips. "I'm just feeling sorry for myself. Today's kinda hard day, ya know?" Looking up at her brother, her lip begins to quiver, desperately trying to swallow down her tears.

Looking back at his sister, Mike nods his head. He knows exactly what today means to her, how hard it will be for her to get through the day—the week.

Anger boils just at the surface. Mike is furious at Edward for sucking the life right out of Bella and extinguishing the light she had in her eyes, . He's angry at himself for not being able to protect his sister, to take her pain away. As much as Bella put on a happy face and buried her hurt, she wasn't fooling Mike. He was acutely aware of the pain she suffered and who was at fault.

"Don't cry, it's your special day," he smiles at her. "Whadaya wanna do today? You name it and we'll do it."

"I dunno." Bella shrugs. "I really don't feel like doing anything."

"What do you mean, you don't feel like doing anything," he scoffs, nudging her leg. "You love celebrating your birthday, come on Bella...there's gotta be something you want to do."

"Okay, well...I would love some pizza from Peter Piper's Pizza and some ice cream," Bella says, smiling sheepishly. Bella can see the effort her brother is making at trying to brighten her spirit which is the only reason she is agreeing to going out at all.

Standing up, Mike claps his hands. "If pizza and ice cream is your wish, then that, baby sister, is what you'll have," he exclaims. Bending down, he kisses Bella's forehead. "Get up and get ready, we have a pizza party to go to," he tells her, winking at her as he straightens up and heads towards the door.

.

.

Four hours later, after pizza and ice cream, Bella and Mike make their way back home.

"Thank you for doing this for me." Bella looks over at her brother with childlike adoration.

"Anytime, little sister, anytime," he says, smiling over at her from the driver's seat.

Pulling into their driveway, Bella notices Alice's car parked behind her mother's. "What's Alice doing here?" she asks. "And whose car is that?" Pointing to a car parked behind her own.

"I dunno." Mike shrugs in response. "Maybe she came by to bring you a birthday present."

"Yeah, maybe…but she's usually at the café at this hour." Bella says as she steps out of the car.

"Hi, Mike!" Alice shouts as she comes bouncing down the front steps, a bouquet of balloons in hand. "Happy Birthday, Bella," she exclaims, pulling Bella into a bone crushing hug.

"Thanks Alice, what're you doing here, aren't you supposed to be at the café?"

"It's your birthday silly. What do you mean 'what am I doing here?'" Alice shakes her head.

Alice is well aware of how tough today would be for Bella. Alice and Bella had become very close over the months. Having someone to confide in was refreshing for both Bella and Alice. Being new to the area was hard for Alice. When she hired Bella, she took to her instantly. For Bella, having Alice as a confidant was therapeutic; she was a neutral party to just listen and not judge or take sides, something Bella desperately needed.

Of course Bella could confide in Tanya or her mother, but really, could they hear her out without getting angry? Without getting frustrated that she still loved Edward? That she hoped he would clean up his act and come back to her? Unfortunately Bella knew the answer was no.

"Jake's covering for me. Besides, someone was bugging the shit outta me to come see you." Alice smirks.

Looking quickly at her front door and back at Alice, Bella asks, "Jason…Jason's here with you?"

"Yup, he sure is. He's getting along pretty well with your mom and Tanya."

"Yeah they met him a few times before he went off to college," Bella answers.

"I still can't believe you know my cousin, such a small world." Alice giggles.

"Ummm…Alice, have you said anything to Jason, about Edward, or the baby?" Bella asks.

She shakes her head."No, I haven't said a word, he's asked about you and Edward. I told him he needed to ask you. It's not my story to tell."

"Thank you, I know I'll have to tell him." Having to rehash all that hurt isn't something Bella is looking forward to, especially with Jason. She knew he wouldn't judge her, but he would definitely be pissed at how Edward has treated her— probably to the point of blows. Jason and Edward had a mutual dislike for one another. There was no masking the tension that would permeate the air whenever the two were in close proximity.

"Hey you two, whatcha gossiping about out here?" Jason asks as she strolls down the stairs, steps onto the driveway, and walks up to Bella. "Happy Birthday, Bella," he says as he brings her into a hug.

"I hope it's okay that I came with Alice, we aren't interrupting any plans you have, are we?" he asks.

"No, you're not interrupting anything, I had no plans today."

"Good…we better get you inside then, your mom's asking for you. She has a cake with your name on it." He smiles sweetly over at her.

"Oh, and it's your favorite, mint chocolate chip ice cream cake." Alice claps her hands, bouncing on her feet. It seems Alice is more eager for cake than Bella.

Groaning, Bella rolls her eyes. "I told her she didn't have to do anything for me. I'm nineteen, not nine. I don't need a cake."

"Yeah well, mothers never listen do they?" he says with a chuckle. "So plaster on that beautiful smile, and make your mother happy." Jason slings his arm around Bella's shoulder and guides her inside.

Alice follows behind them giggling. "You two are just too darn cute."

.

.

Bella sits at the head of the table with everyone waiting for her to make a wish and blow out the candles. In that moment, her mind takes her back to another wish made on her fifteenth birthday—Sitting shoulder-to-shoulder with Edward, their families singing "Happy Birthday." Renee telling them to close their eyes and make a wish. That day Bella wished for Edward to be happy, to find someone who would love him. Bella had wished that she was that someone. So much for wishes.

The second that match was lit, it grabbed a hold of both of them. It wasn't until she was let up for air that Bella realized how destructive their love truly was. Does she regret ever loving Edward? Of course not; she was blessed with a miracle out of that love. Her son would be a living breathing reminder of the beauty in what they shared.

Closing her eyes, Bella wishes for the serenity of a peaceful life for her and her son; whatever form that may take, even if it means that she trudges ahead as a single mother or shares parenthood with Edward. All she wants is to provide her child with a beautiful life, and be the best person she can be for him.

.

.

Sitting out on her front porch with Jason, Bella finds herself recounting all that's happened in the last two years. She talks about her relationship with Edward, his drug use, her pregnancy and their breakup. All the while Jason sits next to her listening intently, taking everything in.

"So…that's what I've been up to the last two years." Bella looks over at him and shrugs.

"Wow…so you're gonna be a mom, huh?" he says, looking over at Bella with wide eyes. Releasing a breath he says, "That wasn't what I was expecting."

"Yeah, I bet," she answers, shaking her head and laughing humorlessly. "Believe me, this isn't where I pictured my life would be a year ago. I sure as hell never imagined I'd be a single parent."

"Bella, you're a beautiful person inside and out, this kid is very lucky to have you for their mother." Jason tells her seriously, trying to convey the faith he has in Bella. "You watch and see, things will work out. Everything will be the way it's supposed to in the end."

"Yeah." Bella sighs looking out into the night sky.

"Listen, Bella, I know how much Edward means to you, and I know how bad you probably want to save him. But—"

"I know, Jason. Don't you think I realize I can't save him?" Bella cuts him off. "I know that he has issues he needs to work through, that no matter how much I pray—that this baby—or his love for me would be enough to get him clean…" Bella rushes out as her heart pounds rapidly in her chest. It fights her every thought. With every single push it gives, it's as if she can hear his name whispered in her ear. The fight that's going on in her body—mentally she knows she can't do anything for him; the best thing she can do is walk away, and think about her and her child.

Emotionally, though, it's eating her alive. Her heart refuses to believe that Edward is a lost cause. It refuses to give up on him. Her body craves him. Her blood runs through her veins in search of his touch. Her heart waits patiently for him to breathe life back into her soul.

Realization is a hard pill to swallow.

"I know those reasons will never be good enough," she whispers.

Taking her hand in his, Jason squeezes it letting her know he understands.

"You won't be alone, you have your family, Alice…me." He looks at her with sincerity etched in his features. "I mean it, Bella. Whatever you need, I'm here for you, for this baby. You don't have to do this alone."

"Jason," she says with a sigh. "You don't have to…it's not your responsibility."

"I know it's not, but…I care about you, please let me help."

"Thank you, that really means alot to me." Bella tightens her hold on his hand.

"Well...it's getting late, I should get home," Jason says as he looks at his watch.

"Yeah it is," Bella says as she stands up and stretches her arms above her head. "You'd be surprised the area's in your body that hurt during pregnancy." She moans as her back arches. "I hurt in places you wouldn't believe. Come on, I'll walk you out." Jason looks at her and chuckles.

"Thank you for coming, this day turned out better than I expected." Bella smiles at him.

Bringing her into a hug, Jason kisses her hair. "Thanks for having me, I had fun." Bella wraps her arms around his waist and breathes in a sigh of relief. He isn't Edward, and she is fully aware that she isn't ready to have a romantic relationship with anyone; she isn't mentally or emotionally prepared for that. But she can and will wholeheartedly embrace Jason as a friend.

Jason leaves with a promise to call her and meet for dinner. Bella smiles to herself, who would have thought, the boy she met working at the mall would be the one picking up her pieces.

Her heart rate picks up instantly, blood rushes to her ears. She can sense him before she sees him. His scent is so overpowering it makes her mouth water. She closes her eyes—his warmth so close to her back that it burns her skin.

"Happy Birthday, love," he whispers ever so softly in her ear. His hands run down her arms, leaving hot trails in their wake. Her pulse thumps under her skin with the rush of blood that chases Edward's every move. Her flesh is starving for him and greedily absorbs his touch, begging for more—pleading for him to never let go.

Grasping her arms firmly, he turns her around. "What was he doing here," he asks her. Yet she doesn't see anger in his eyes, instead it's sadness, resignation...panic even. He looks so tired and frail, his skin is blotchy and paper thin.

"Edward, don't do this. Don't ruin a good day." Bella moves out of his grasp. "He's a friend—he came to say 'Happy Birthday.'" She looks at him annoyed. "I don't owe you explanations…why are you here?"

"It's your birthday, we promised remem…" he clears his throat, swallowing down his emotions. "We promised never to miss a birthday." Not quite meeting Bella's eye, he shoves his shaky hands into his pockets.

"Yeah, I remember…just like I remember you also promising to love me. To never hurt me, that you'd always be here. That you would never treat me like your father did your mother." Bella folds her arms across her chest to hold herself together.

"But all those promises were broken, weren't they?" Bella sighs resolutely. "I gotta get inside," she mumbles as she turns to walk away, unwilling to show Edward any sign of her crumbling resolve.

"Please…please don't...don't go." She hears him whisper. Turning around, she stares at him, and is speechless. What exactly is it that he expects of her? Is this his insecurity and jealousy talking? Is he trying to stake his claim? Was seeing Jason too much for him?

"I'm sorry…" she mutters. Stepping closer, she places a hand on his cheek. "You're so much more than this Edward. You deserve so much more. I'm sorry my love wasn't strong enough to hold us both up," she whispers through her tears.

Shaking his head, he grasps her hand. "No, do..don't say tha…that, I nee…need you," he mumbles as his tears fall freely down his face.

"I can't do this…I'm sorry."

Wiping at his tears, he looks at her. "I've really lost you, haven't I?" he asks. Realization of what he's lost finally setting in.

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N:**

**Thank you for sticking with me, see ya'll next time :)**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there.**

**I love to hear your thoughts :)**


	23. Chapter 23

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

_Chapter 22_

_May 21, 2013_

Standing in the shadows watching them, seeing his hands all over her, is excruciating. Holding himself upright against the tree is the only thing that keeps his knees from buckling when she sinks into his embrace. Anger and sorrow swell, competing to be the dominant emotion. What the fuck was he doing here, back in her life? The way she holds onto him and buries her face into his chest with her hands splayed across his back is all wrong. That was how she had clung to Edward not so long ago. The smell of her shampoo still lingers in his nose. The soft curves of her body—God how long had it been that he's held her in his arms, kissed her? When was the last time Edward truly looked into those big beautiful brown eyes that he loved to get lost in. How long ago was it that he heard her laugh, or felt her breath fan across his face, or even seen her smile? It had been far too long. And now there was someone else in his place.

.

.

.

Edward waits until Jason drives off before he makes his presence known. He knows there is a chance that she would leave him standing out there alone, that she wouldn't want to see him. But that is a risk he is willing to take, he had promised himself he would see her today even if it was to have her turn him away.

The second he moves away from the tree and takes that first step towards her, he is no longer in control of his own body. The pull is so profound he could close his eyes and know his heart will guide him directly to her. She didn't have to turn around for him to know she knew he was there. Her soul cries out to him, and his returns the call just as loud.

Her closeness causes his skin to prickle, his heart rate to spike, and sets his nerve endings on high alert. The instant he touches her, all the breath leaves his body. His throat constricts and his mouth goes so dry, as if he hasn't had a drop of water in weeks. He craves her desperately. Closing his eyes and basking in her warmth, he grips her arms. It's the only thing he can do to keep himself from completely devouring her.

He has been such a fool, and loathes being in his own skin. How can he be deserving of the love she so freely gave? He isn't, and he never will be. She deserves someone to love her completely, take care of her, and always put her first. Instead, she's suffering at the hands of a man who never truly knew how to love her. A man so wrapped up in his own insecurities that he can't see that the best thing to walk into his life is slipping from his grasp and walking away from him.

"Please…please don't go", he chokes out. He is grasping at straws. What can he do or say to make her stay? His mind is on overdrive. He is literally sick to his stomach at the idea that she might not talk to him again.

He hasn't gotten high over the last two days—it was the one thing he thought he could give Bella on her birthday—a sober and clear mind. That decision was kicking him in the ass, with a sober, clear mind also comes all the guilt over what he had done to her and their families; it was now eating him alive. It takes all his power not to buckle over and hurl. That voice inside him keeps whispering in his ear that there is an easy remedy to all his problems; all he needs to do is walk away, just turn around and go home. The solution to his agony is waiting for him in his drawer.

It would take five seconds for him to place that glass pipe in his mouth, light it and inhale—he would forget about her instantly. It would be so easy to forget and not give a shit about anything at all. He would be on top of the world—invincible, no one could take him down.

Deciding not to get high since the day before caused his body to realize how tired it was—he hadn't slept in three days. When he wakes up the day of Bella's birthday his body begins to rebel, but he fully intends to keep his promise, withdrawal or not he was going to see her on her birthday.

Withdrawal begins to fully set in later in the day—nausea, tremors, cold sweat, heart beating a mile a minute—everything hurts. Suddenly coming here isn't such a good idea anymore, but his heart is exactly where it wants to be, close to its love. When he touches Bella he can breathe a little.

A part of him is screaming at him to leave, the other part, which is being directed by his heart, is telling him to stay. It's telling him to be a man, to be someone Bella can be proud of. This part of him shouts for him to become someone worthy of her love and to forget about his next high. It pleads for Edward to leave the meth behind. Everything that's sacred is right in front of him. How can he be such a selfish prick and turn his back on that? Bella is carrying his child for Christ's sake—a child he is nowhere near deserving of. How can he be…how can someone like him be blessed with life when he had taken Bella's away, along with destroying his own?

"I'm sorry…" she mutters. Stepping closer, she places a hand on his cheek. "You're so much more than this Edward. You deserve so much more. I'm sorry my love wasn't strong enough to hold us both up," she whispers through her tears.

Shaking his head, he grasps her hand. Trying desperately to make her see, make her understand that he is the one who is sorry. His heart is screaming for help, pleading for him to not give up. He desperately wants to take her in his arms and never let go. He knows he is losing her, perhaps for good. It is written plainly across her face. She is done and shutting him out completely.

Shaking his head, he grasps her hand. "No, do..don't say tha…that, I nee…need you," he mumbles as his tears fall freely down his face.

"I can't do this…I'm sorry."

Wiping at his tears, he looks at her. "I've really lost you, haven't I" he states softly. Realization of what he's lost finally setting in. In that moment, his whole entire existence comes crashing down on him. Watching her walk away, this time for good, has him gasping for air.

Edward stands there, just staring at her front door, for what seemed like hours. There is nothing left inside of him, he is empty. His reason for existing is gone; he has lost the one thing in his life that is loving and beautiful.

Shaking his head—he understands now that he's ruined her, destroyed her life, and sucked everything pure out of her. His choices have brought her to her knees right along with him. No matter how much he tries to push her away and keep her at arm's length, his mess still reached her. Now, she's a shell of the person she once was, just like he is.

He had done exactly what he vowed never to do. Edward did to Bella what his father had done to his mother, the only thing Edward hoped for was that Bella was stronger than Elizabeth.

.

.

.

Walking into his home, Edward feels as though everything is in slow motion. Did he really just lose Bella? Has he also lost the only people that he considered family; Renee and Charlie had been a mother and father to him more than his own parents. Why did he just let her walk away, why didn't he put up more of a fight?

"Fuck," he chokes out. Bile rising up his throat, he runs to the sink and dry heaves. Slamming his hands down on the counter he loses his fight to maintain his cool. No longer able to keep his emotions in check, he reaches for a glass cup in the sink and throws it across the kitchen.

"Motherfucker!" he screams. Swiping his hand across the counter—everything topples down, dishes and glasses crash on the floor, shattering into pieces. The sight could be a metaphor for Edwards life right now.

"Whoa, what the fuck is going on?" Emmett runs into the kitchen, stopping at the entrance wide eyed. "Ed, man...what the fuck has gotten into you," he asks.

"I fucking lost her," he cries, pulling at his hair. His eyes dart everywhere, but not really looking at anything. Is he going crazy? He's sure he's in the process of losing his mind, this can't be real. Gasping for breath, he clutches his chest. "Oh God, I've lost her," he wails. "I've lost them all."

"Okay, you're scaring me. Who have you lost?" Emmett asks as he steps into the kitchen. "Edward, are you okay? Are you high? Do you need to go to the hospital?" Frantically trying to figure out whether his brother is having a nervous breakdown or if he is just so high that he's hallucinating.

"Breathe, bro...calm down, just breathe." Placing a hand on Edward's back, Emmett rubs a soothing pattern, trying to calm him down enough to find out what's going on. "That's it, just breathe."

Eyes swollen from crying, blinking rapidly to clear his watery vision, Edward finally looks at his brother."She's gone, Em," Edward says, his voice barely above a whisper and raw from his screaming.

"You keep saying that—what happened, what did you do?" he asks, confused.

"I've lost her. I've lost them all." His lip quivers, shaking his head; he lets out a humorless chuckle. "I thought she'd be happy to see me. I decided to stay clean for her today." He closes his eyes tight. "She doesn't want me anymore. She doesn't love me." A fresh set of tears stream down his face.

"That fucking asshole was there. His hands were all over her," Edward growls. Gripping the counter top, he bangs his head against the kitchen cabinet. "He has no fucking right to touch her, she's MINE!" he hollers. "I'll fucking kill him."

"Okay, calm the fuck down." Emmett holds Edward, gripping him by his shoulders. "What the hell are you talking about?" he questions.

Shaking his head, Edward mumbles, "It doesn't matter. She'll never love him like she loved me." It's as if he's reassuring himself. "He'll never have her. I'll make sure of it." Turning his head, he looks at Emmett with pleading eyes and asks, "She'll never love him like she loved me...right Em?"

Clearing his throat, his eyes begin to water, understanding who Edward is speaking about, Emmett answers, "No...no one will ever love each other as much as you two do." He reassures him.

"Edward, who was there tonight? Was it that dude—Jason?"

Snapping his head up. "How do you know his name? Did you know about him already?" he asks, anger creeping back in.

"I met him the other day at the cafe, after Bella's performance. I was going to tell you—"

Emmett wasn't able to finish, before a fist came crashing into his jaw. His head snaps backwards, causing him to stumble back a few steps—another blow hits his temple.

"You son of a bitch, you fucking knew!" Edward bellows. "You're my brother."

Righting himself, Emmett, ducks out of the way. "Edward, what the fuck?" he yells.

Spinning on his heel Edward rushes Emmett. "Fuck you! You fucking knew! You knew he was back and didn't tell me."

Stepping back, Emmett kicks Edward's foot and brings him to his knees, reaching out he grips one of Edward's wrist, he steps behind him and grabs him in a choke hold. "You don't wanna fight me bro, I'm not the one you're pissed at," Emmett murmurs in his ear.

"Get the fuck off me," Edward growls trying to shake Emmett off.

Tightening his hold, Emmett shakes his head. "No way bro, I'm not letting you go. I'm here...I'm here for you," Emmett says. "You're my little brother dammit...I fucking love you," he mutters. "Stop fighting me, please...let me help you."

Hugging his brother, Emmett sits back against the wall and holds Edward, letting him cry as he whispers reassuring words in his ear. Finally able to get him under control enough to walk him to his room, Emmett helps Edward into bed.

.

.

.

Rolling over on the bed, his head is pounding, his stomach is in knots. Replaying all the day's prior events in his head.

That little voice in his head whispers to him. Nervously looking around the empty room as if someone can hear his tormentor's taunting, his mouth instantly goes dry, closing his eyes he tries desperately to ignore it.

"Stop being a fucking coward," he mumbles into his pillow. His body is shaking. Biting the side of his cheek, he tries to breath through his nausea. All the while the voice gets louder,_ "Just open the drawer Edward. Just one hit, one hit is all it'll take to make all this go away."_

Edward blindly reached for his radio, switching it on—desperately wanting to drown out the voice in his head. The lyrics that echo against his four walls are a soundtrack of what what's to come—what he's lost.

_"Going back to the corner where I first saw you_

_Gonna camp in my sleeping bag, I'm not gonna move_

_Got some words on cardboard, got your picture in my hand_

_Saying if you see this girl can you tell her where I am_

_Some try to hand me money, they don't understand_

_I'm not broke I'm just a broken hearted man_

_I know it makes no sense, but what else can I do_

_How can I move on when I'm still in love with you"_

Sitting up in bed, he clutches his head in his hands, and pulls his hair. He eyes the drawer, picturing exactly where his pipe, lighter and baggie rest—his mouth waters.

_"'Cause if one day you wake up and find that you're missing me_

_And your heart starts to wonder where on this earth I could be"_

Reaching for his drawer, he pulls it open slowly. With a shaky hand he pulls out what his body is so desperately craving. Cradling it, he stares down at what's in his hand. Tears slip down his face, "Just one more hit, then I'm done," he whispers.

Bringing the pipe to his lips, he lights the end, and watches the contents boil. Inhaling deeply—swallowing the smoke, he closes his eyes and loses himself in the fog of his high.

_"Thinking maybe you'll come back here to the place that we'd meet_

_And you'd see me waiting for you on the corner of the street_

_So I'm not moving_

_I'm not moving"_

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N**

**I hope you all enjoyed this little insight into Edward's head. **

**Chapter song - The man that can't be moved by The Script**

**Thank you for sticking with me, see ya'll next time :)**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there.**

**I love to hear your thoughts :)**


	24. Chapter 24

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

_Chapter 23_

_June 2012_

Tears streamed down her cheeks as all sorts of scenarios played in her mind. Bella knew she was in hot water for missing curfew.

"It'll be okay, love. Please stop crying," Edward said as he knelt in front of her, cupping her cheek. How could they have fallen asleep? He felt like such an idiot. He hated to see Bella cry, but…he was at a loss on how to comfort her. Knowing Charlie would be pissed, the one rule he had set—which was a pretty reasonable rule, something that was easy to follow—was broken, and all hell, as far as Bella and Edward were concerned, would be let loose. Charlie Swan was a reasonable man, easy-going actually, until you defied him.

"I'm sure Charlie will understand, we'll just have to explain what happened," he said, trying to reassure Bella and himself at the same time. Charlie had to understand, he had been a teenager once, he had to have missed curfew a time or two? He couldn't just take Bella's car away, but…would he go as far as to not let Edward visit either? Shaking his head free of those horrible thoughts, Edward concentrated on calming Bella down.

"No…he's gonna take the car, Edward. He said, the first time I came home a minute late, the car was gone!" Bella cried. Charlie was pissed, she knew that for certain. No matter how much explaining, begging or crying Bella did, Charlie wouldn't care. All that mattered was that she missed her curfew, there was no ifs, ands, or buts, she was late, end of discussion.

"I better go," Bella mumbled. Standing up she gathered her belongings. The dread building at having to go home, maybe she should just stay the night? She had already passed her curfew. Charlie would surely come looking for her if she did that. God only knows what he'd think, and then what he might do to Edward. Going home was a way better option. At least she would get the blunt end of Charlie's lecture and hope that by the time Edward came around, Charlie's anger would be diffused.

"I'm coming with you, we'll explain what happened. I won't let you take the blame, it was both our faults." Edward told her.

Turning and looking at Edward, Bella shook her head. "No. You stay here, it'll just make things worse if he sees you. I'll explain what happened."

"No, Bella. I'm following you home. I'm not letting you drive home alone at this hour." Edward's eyes widened, grabbing his keys, he closed the gap between them.

"If you show up alone, what's he gonna think, huh? He'll think I don't give a shit and sent you off alone, that'll be worse than showing my face tonight." Kissing her, he gently squeezed her arms. "Let's go, the sooner we get you home, the sooner this'll be over."

"Okay." Bella looked at him and sighed.

.  
.

It was close to two fifteen in the morning when Edward and Bella arrived at her house. Hands linked together as they both entered the front door, each one of them feeding off of the others so-called courage, when in reality they were both a mess of nerves.

Charlie sat in his recliner—side table lamp on, hands clasped together, staring at the couple in front of him.

"What time is it?" he asked. His calm and collected voice sent a shiver down Bella's spine, she knew that tone. Charlie Swan was on the verge of losing his cool—watching her walk in that door in one piece was relieving and infuriating. A parent's worst nightmare is to wait for hours on end, and then get a phone call that something has happened to their child. But, to sit there in the middle of the night for more than two hours, with no phone call from either Bella or Edward saying she was fine and on her way, had Charlie seeing stars.

Bella knew the second she opened her mouth, no matter what came out, her father was going to lose his shit. But, Charlie never screamed, he wasn't one for dramatics; no, he would get his point across with a few choice words. Maybe that was why it hurt so much to be reprimanded by him, being spoken to with that disappointed look in his eyes, the you should know better look, that felt far worse than being yelled at.

Tightening her hold on Edwards's hand, Bella tried to explain her reason for being late. "Daddy, I'm sor—

"What time is it?" Charlie asked again.

"Two fifteen in the morning," Bella whispered.

"And what time is your curfew?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Midnight," Bella mumbled, her voice quivered. Edward could see the tears fall freely down her cheeks.

He wasn't sure if speaking at this moment was going to do any good, Charlie had yet to acknowledge his presence. But, he couldn't just stand there either. Edward took a step in front of Bella, as if to shield her.

"Charlie, I know Bella missed curfew…but…it was an honest mis—"

"I don't want to hear what your excuses are, "Charlie said as he rose from his seat. "I'm speaking to my daughter, she's the one who lives here, the one who broke her curfew, the one who does have rules to follow, I wouldn't expect you to understand that," he sneered.

"Daddy!" Bella cried. "Please…don't…don't be mean to Edward."

"It's okay, love." Edward shook his head as he whispered to her. "He was worried and angry."

"Damn straight I was worried. Can either of you tell me, why in the hell I didn't get a phone call!" Charlie questioned, his arms opened wide at his sides.

"I didn't think about calling," Edward and Bella answered in unison, heads bowed. Feeling rather stupid at the moment, maybe if one of them would have thought to call and let Charlie know what happened, they could have avoided all this mess.

"Yeah, and you know what happens when you don't think kids—you screw up—and ya done screwed up." Charlie stated.

Neither one of them looked up at Charlie. They both knew he was right, they should have called. With nothing to say, Bella finally looked up at her dad. With her hand clasped in Edwards, she waited for her punishment.

"Go on home Edward, it's late." Charlie looked sternly at him. "Say your goodbyes…"He waved his hand in the air "…I don't know how long it's gonna be before you see each other again," he stated.

Bella shrieked. "What? You can't stop us from seeing each other!" Her anger quickly bubbled to the surface. Did he really think that she wasn't going to see Edward? Yeah, she lives in her parents home, has to follow their rules, but she isn't a child anymore—she can buy cigarettes legally for Christ sake—how could Charlie really forbid them from seeing each other?

"Bella, stop…just let it go," Edward murmured, tugging on her arm.

"No! Edward, he can't, I won't…" She argued, turning around to face him.

"Shhh…stop, it'll be okay. You fighting this will only make things worse," he whispered to her as he clasped her face in his hands. "I'm gonna go, I'll call you," he said as he leaned down and kissed her softly. "Promise me you won't fight anymore. Don't make thing worse, please."

"Edward…" she sighed, defeated.

"Promise," he demands.

"I promise," she mumbled.

"Good. Love you."

"I love you too." With one last peck to her lips, Edward was out the door.

.  
.

It had been three long, excruciating days for Bella and Edward. Charlie had indeed taken Bella's car away. Bella tried really hard to keep her promise to Edward. She lasted two days with no arguing, no pouting, just taking her punishment like an adult. But, all that went to hell the second Charlie forbid Edward to come over and visit.

"What the hell do you mean, he can't come over!" Bella shouted.

"Watch your tone and language young lady." Charlie pointed a finger in Bella's direction.

"You can't forbid me from seeing Edward, I'm eighteen."

"Like hell I can't, this is my house—if I say he ain't stepping one foot on my property then he ain't stepping one foot on my property." Charlie stated. "Besides, I think you two need some time apart—go visit your friends, hang out with your sister—you and Edward are always together." Charlie shook his head.

"What?" Bella let out a humorless laugh. "Now you're gonna tell me who to hang out with, and how to spend my time?" she scoffed, placing her hands on her hips.

"Don't get smart with me, Bella," Charlie warned. "I won't be disrespected in my own home."

Rolling her eyes, Bella folded her hands across her chest. "Yeah yeah, it's your house, and King Charles rules. Well maybe I'll just leave then, that way I don't have any rules to follow," Bella exclaimed.

"Really? Go right ahead." Charlie threw his head back and laughed. "You think it's easy living out in the real world, you think it's so terrible living here? I would love to see you make it out there." Pointing a finger towards the door, Charlie shook his head.

"You kids all think it's fun and games and that us parents are just so mean to you, that we're ruining your lives. You wanna leave Bella—I can't stop you—if you stay, my rules apply and you will follow them, and that means Edward will not able to visit." Charlie looked at her, turned around and walked off, leaving Bella standing in the living room.

.  
.

Bella was so angry she couldn't even think straight. She couldn't believe her dad. Why was he being so stubborn? He acted as if Bella was the first to ever break any of his rules. Bella wiped at her angry tears as they fell down her cheeks. Stuffing her clothes in a backpack, she called Edward to come pick her up, purposefully leaving out what had transpired earlier with Charlie.

"Bella, sweetheart, what are you doing?" Renee asked as she walked into the room. Being at work all morning, she had missed that latest round between Charlie and Bella.

"I'm leaving, mama. I can't…he's being so unfair." Bella huffed, sitting down on her bed, tears fell down her face.

"Oh baby, please don't make any rash decisions," Renee sat down next to Bella, and ran a hand down her hair.

"Why mama? Why is he being so mean. Mike broke the rules all the time—hell even Tanya's broken the rules. Daddy's never acted this way towards them?" Bella asked her mother. "Do you know that he said Edward can't come visit me here?"

Sighing, Renee looked at her daughter. "You wanna know why—why he's being so hard on you?"

"Yes," Bella answered.

"It's because you're the apple of his eye, his first baby girl." Renee smiled at her. "He thinks the world of you, baby. He expects such greatness out of you. In his eye you can do no wrong." Bella rolled her eyes and huffed.

"He was so worried that something had happened to you when you didn't come home on time. And then you didn't call. When you showed up with Edward—well let's just say your father is a little jealous—he knows he's losing his baby girl to this man, and he's terrified. I think this is his way of trying to stop it," Renee said.

"Well, that's completely unfair, he can't have expectations of me and not Tanya or Mike. So, it's okay for them but not me?" Bella shook her head. "We are all his kids, mama. He can't treat me differently, from everybody else. He can't stop me from loving Edward."

"I know sweetheart. That's a very hard lesson for parents to learn. I guess your daddy is gonna have to learn it the hard way, huh?"

Bella's phone chimed with an incoming text from Edward, letting her know he was outside. "Edwards here for me," Bella said as she looked up at her mother.

"You sure about what you're doing? This is a big step," Renee asked as she stood up. "You and your daddy are so much alike—both stubborn as hell. He loves you Bella, you'll realize that one day, and you'll understand when you have your own children." Renee leaned down and planted a kiss on Bella's forehead.

Standing up, Bella pulled her mother into a hug, buried her head in the crook of her neck. "I love you, mama."

"I love you too, sweetheart." Renee whispered through her tears, hugging her daughter back tightly. Untangling herself from her mother's embrace, Bella picked up her bag, walked out of her room, down the hallway and out the front door.

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N**

**Thank you for sticking with me, see ya'll next time :)**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there.**

**I love to hear your thoughts :)**

* * *

**New Contest - Coming Soon!**

**_'_****_A Journey into the Dark & Twisted Contest'_**** - more info to come, put it on alert peeps, it's gonna be awesome!**

**Search under author - Dark and Twisted Contest**


	25. Chapter 25

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

_Chapter twenty-four_

_May 26th, 2013_

Today is Edward's birthday, this day was definitely going to be harder for Bella to get through than her birthday. Last night her mind was flooded with memories of her and Edward in years past—family, smiles, cake, presents. Even though Edward always grumbled about not wanting to be included in the festivities, he'd end up conceding. At the end of the day he secretly loved it. He always told Bella how grateful he was that the Swans took him and his brothers in as part of their family. Every important event in Bella's life, Edward was always by her side.

Jumping forward several years, Bella thinks about all the questions her son will ask. Questions every child is curious about: who was your best friend growing up, your first love, your prom date? One thing she is grateful for is that, if her child grew up without Edward in his life, Bella will be able to answer those question—even for Edward. She knew her child's father—better than he knew himself at one point. Now...not so much. How will she handle those questions, the ones where your child asks: why isn't my daddy here, why didn't my daddy stay, how come I don't know my daddy, does my daddy love me?

Knowing nothing on this earth will be harder for her than to look her son in the eye and answer those questions. Bella knows that when the time comes she will be as honest as possible, hoping that her sons heart won't be broken—if that was at all possible. Bella loves her son—enough she thought, for both her and Edward. If only that will be enough. She isn't stupid, she's aware that there will be a void in her son's life that only a father could fill. That he will crave that father-son relationship, watch his friends go to football practices with their dads, and wonder why he can't have that. Will Charlie or Mike be enough to fill that void? Will Jason really stick around and love her son unconditionally—become that father figure.

No matter what happens in the future, all Bella knows for certain is that she will try her hardest to be both mother and father for her child.

.

.

.

The warm spring air carries the floral scent of her mother's garden through Bella's open window. She inhales deeply, the fragrant blossoms soothing her troubled soul.

Alice is coming over today, she has arranged a shopping excursion for Bella. They were going to create a wish list—baby items Bella wanted—that family and friends can buy. Alice was planning Bella's baby shower and everything needed to be perfect, Alice always crossed her T's and dotted her I's.

"Alice...why don't you just go and create the registry for me," Bella whines. "I hate shopping, besides, everything on that registry, whether I go or not, is going to be things you chose anyway."

"Nope, you're coming with me." Shaking her head, Alice plops herself down on Bella's bed.

"Come on, get up, it's gonna be fun!" Alice bumps Bella on the shoulder. "This is your first baby, your first baby shower!" Alice's body vibrating in excitement. "You need to record all these experiences in your baby book! What will you tell Anthony when he asks you about this stuff, if you don't get involved."

"Fine...get out so I can get dressed," Bella huffs. Alice jumps off the bed squealing.

"Oh, I had meant to ask you, do you want to invite any of Edwards family to the shower?" Alice asks, stopping at the door. "I know he's a touchy subject, so I want to make sure—Does he know it's a boy yet?"

Bella didn't respond only shook her head. Little did Bella and Alice know—the unseasonably warm morning brought an unexpected addition to their conversation. Elizabeth sipped on her coffee, leaning against the fence within earshot of Bella's open window.

.

.

.

Walking into her home, a smug smile on her lips, she knew exactly what this news was going to do to her son. Did she care—no she didn't. In the long run, her son would be better off, she thought. He didn't need that stuck up girl, or her too good for anyone family.

All that family ever did was turn her sons against her, it was time she got her sons back—once and for all cut all ties with the Swans.

Walking into the living room, Emmett, Jasper and Edward are all strewn across the sofas watching TV.

"What's up, mom?" Emmett asks as Elizabeth stands blocking the view to the television.

"Oh, I just have some news to share with Edward," she says smiling.

Looking up at his mother, he stares at her, expecting her to continue. "Yeah, what about?" he asks.

"So...I was outside just now and over heard your darling Bella talking in her room." Looking at Edward, knowing the second she mentions Bella, he was going to be upset. But he would thank her after she tells him the news. According to Elizabeth, Bella was keeping Edward away on purpose, this was her way of controlling things, not letting Edward have any input in the way the pregnancy or the way the child was going to be raised.

"Do you know what she's having?" Elizabeth asks with a raised eyebrow.

Sitting up, Edward shakes his head. "Na...I haven't spoken to her in a few, why, what did you hear?"

Standing up Emmett says, "If you're just gonna start shit, Ma, then don't say anything at all. Edward doesn't need you instigating anything between him and Bella. It's their business, why you over there ear hustling anyway?" Emmett scoffs.

"Oh shut the fuck up, Em. Edward is _my_ son. I've always said that little bitch wasn't any good for him. You both always defend that damn family." Elizabeth's eyes go wide as she throws her hands in the air. "Look...look at your brother, look what she did to him!" She points. "She did that, the second she moved in with him, things went downhill for him. She forced herself on him, and made him turn to drugs," she accused. "Just like your father did to me," she whispered.

"It always comes back to you, doesn't it Ma? You can't stand that family because they have been there for us, more than you have these last five years," Emmett admits.

"Oh, so are you saying I'm a bad mother? That I don't love you boys? That, that woman over there loves you more than I do?" Elizabeth screams. "Then why is she keeping that baby away from you, from its father! Huh?"

"God! You're so—You can't even see the truth, even if it's slapping you in the face!" Emmett cries. "Edward, tell her, tell her why you and Bella aren't together, tell her why you aren't involved the pregnancy."

"Because they're better off without me." Edward looks at his mother. "I'm using Ma, I don't want to be around them if I ain't clean."

"Is that what she's telling you, that you ain't good enough for your child?" Elizabeth questions, throwing her head back and laughing. "That's bullshit, she's messing with your head, don't you see? Don't you see that she's manipulating you into believing that? To keep you away from your son." Letting the bomb drop, waiting to see what damage it'll cause.

"What!" Both Edward and Emmett yell out. "Di...did you just say son?" Edward stutters, staring wide eyed at his mother. Emmett is staring at Edward, gauging his brother's reaction to this news.

"Yup, that exactly what I said. Your precious Bella didn't tell you that I bet? Don't you see she's controlling, keeping things from you? She doesn't want that boy to have anything to do with us!" Elizabeth states.

Snapping his head towards his mother, Emmett points a finger in Elizabeth's face. "You're wrong! And you know it," he sneers. "All you're doing is causing more damage!"

Edward is stunned into silence, reaching up he rubs his chest. The pain that lingers there just doubled. "A boy...I'm having a son," he whispers. He tries desperately to swallow down the lump growing in his throat and fight back the tears trying to escape his eyes.

"You all right, bro?" A warm hand touches Edward on the shoulder. Looking up, he sees Jasper sitting there with concern in his eyes.

"A boy, Jaz." Edward's lip quivers as a tear falls down his cheek.

.

.

.

_June 3, 2013_

It had been a week since Edward found out the sex of his child. Until that day, he had never acknowledged the baby as anything, never really thought about his child's life, or even considered being a part of it. All that changed the second he heard the word 'son' come out of his mother's mouth. Would he have felt differently if it was 'daughter' that was uttered. No...he would feel the same, he thought. Knowing the sex of his child, made it real for some reason—his guilt was now eating him alive.

How much had he missed already, the first doctor's appointment, the first ultrasound, hearing the heartbeat for the first time. Feeling Bella's body stretch under his palms with their growing baby. He hadn't experienced any of that. How much more would he miss, will Bella allow him any sort of contact? He wouldn't blame her if she didn't with all the horrible things he's done and said. The way he abandoned her, left her alone.

"Fuck, this shit is so fucked up," Edward cries, sitting in his room alone with his thoughts. "How in the hell am I ever going to fix the damage I caused."

Admitting he has a problem is the first step in fixing anything. Edward knew there was going to be a long road ahead of him, there was no easy solution, no overnight miracle. He was going to have to make a decision and work hard at sticking with it, if he even wanted to consider ever having a relationship with his son in the future. He needed to get clean, become a person deserving of his son's love, friendship, trust. Most of all the he needed to love and trust himself.

"E, you decent bro, can I come in?" Emmett calls out.

"Yeah."

Pushing the door open, Emmett steps in. "What's up, how you holding up? You've been cooped up in here for a few days."

"Just a lot to process, ya know?" Edward shrugs.

"Yeah, I hear ya. So...whatcha come up with?" Emmett asks. "I hope you don't let all that shit Ma said about Bella and the Swans get to you."

"Na, I know she was playing me, she hates them." Shaking his head, Edward looks out his window. "Bella would never do that to me."

"Good, I'm glad you realize that. None of them would. They love you, always have, always will. They only want what's best for you, Bella and that baby."

"I know bro, I know," Edward mumbles. "I can't believe I've acted like such an asshole, a fucking dipshit. How could I do this to her, to my kid, Em?" Edward looks at his brother. "I wouldn't be surprised if she never wants anything to do with me." Edward tugs at his hair. "But, I gotta try Em, I know I've said it before, but I mean it this time. I owe it to my son, he deserves better than a deadbeat dad, and if I can't stay clean, then I won't ever come back. I'll stay away for good, let them live their life, without having me in their face all the time." Edward sighs. "I owe it to both of them. I love her too much, and if the only way to show her that is by letting her go, then I'll walk away, she deserves to be happy."

Emmett is leaning against the wall of his brother's room in shock. His mind reeling with all that just came out of Edward's mouth. His heart is beating frantically, he had prayed for so long that Edward would open his eyes and realize all that he's done.

As he continues to look out the window Edward utters the words his brother has been longing to hear.

"I think I should call, Dad. I need help."

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N**

**Thank you for sticking with me, see ya'll next time :)**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there.**

**I love to hear your thoughts :)**

* * *

**New Contest - Coming Soon!**

**'A Journey into the Dark & Twisted Contest' - more info to come, put it on alert peeps, it's gonna be awesome!**

**Search under author - Dark and Twisted Contest**


	26. Chapter 26

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

_Chapter Twenty-five:_

_June 2012_

Tears rolled down her face as she picked up her bag and walked out of her room, down the hallway and out the front door. She wondered where her dad might have been, he wasn't in the living room when she made it to the door. Charlie sat in his backyard, hidden by a tree as he watched his baby girl leave. Tear after tear rolled down his face—what had he done?

He did exactly what Renee had warned him about from the time his daughters were in diapers—he pushed too far. But, had he really? All he ever wanted to do was protect his children, have them avoid making the same mistakes he made.

"I see you a mile away, that path you travelin' on, sugar. I've done came and gone," Grandma Swan would always say.

As Charlie got older and had his own children, he understood exactly what she meant. He also realized—maybe a little too late—that Renee was right; you have to let your children make their own mistakes, as a parent you can't shield them from life. How will they ever learn and grow as individuals, unless they fall and learn to get back up?

"So…you gonna tell me what happened." Edward finally broke the silence. Bella had silently stared out the car window for the last five minutes.

Turning her head to face him, she wiped her tears away. "I left," she said.

"Okay…why? You gotta talk to me, love."

Bella closed her eyes and released a heavy sigh. "He said you couldn't come over. I told him he couldn't keep me from seeing you." Bella shook her head as she looked over at Edward. "Then he said that it was his house and if he said no, that it meant no. He told me that we spend too much time together and I should spend more time with friends," she scoffed folding her arms across her chest.

Edward remained silent, simply nodding to let her know that he was listening.

"Then I said that I would leave so I wouldn't have to follow his rules anymore," Bella mumbled. The more she spoke to Edward about it, the more she felt she had jumped the gun...instead of thinking things through.

She was eighteen, and Charlie needed to understand he couldn't treat her like a child anymore. She was going to stand her ground, show him that she would survive out in the "Real World," as he had put it.

"Bella, love…I'm not saying that I agree with your dad, but—"

"Edward…" Bella sighed.

Edward placed his palm in the air, silently asking her to let him finish."—as a man, I can see where he's coming from. He's protective over you and your sister, and was worried something had happened to you—we didn't call. And then we both walk into your house together..." Edward looked over at Bella with raised eyebrows. "What do you think he thought, huh? I can guarantee the first thing through his mind was—well aside from being relieved you were all right—he was probably pissed that you disobeyed him because of me—a guy," Edward told her.

"Don't you get it, love, it really isn't about breaking curfew. You think his reaction would have been the same if you were out with girlfriends?"

"So, what are you saying?" Bella huffed as she slumped in her seat. "Are you saying I should go back home, that I overreacted about him refusing to let you come over—when would I see you if you can't come over? I don't have a car." Bella knew Edward was right, Renee had said as much. But, she didn't want to hear that from him. He needed to be on her side, tell her that she hadn't overreacted, that she wasn't being stubborn—just like her father—both trying to prove a point and have the last word.

"You don't want me to live with you?" Bella looked over at him and her bottom lip quivered. Her eyes were so sad. All of her emotions came crashing down on her and she couldn't hold it in anymore. She covered her face with her hands and sobbed.

.

.

.

Even though she was there all the time, walking into Edward's apartment that night felt different. She wasn't going home at the end of the day, this was her home now. Sure she had plans for a future with Edward: one day getting married, buying a home, having children, but, she never imagined it would happen so soon.

"Welcome home, love," Edward whispered in her ear as he wrapped his arms around her waist, bringing her in snug against his chest. "You okay?" he asked as he rested his chin on her shoulder.

"I'm tired—drained," she answered.

"Why don't you take a warm shower, relax." He kissed her collarbone. "I'll put your stuff away, order us some pizza and we can watch movies the rest of the day."

Turning around in his embrace, Bella wrapped her arms around his waist and hugged him tight.

"That sounds good," she said as she laid her head on his chest. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"For being here, for loving my crazy ass." She looked up at him and smiled.

"Yeah…you are a little crazy." He looked down at her and laughed. Tightening his hold on her he said, "But you're my crazy girl." He leaned down and kissed her.

.

.

.

_September 2012_

Two months had passed since Bella moved in with Edward. The first month was a big adjustment—for both of them, especially living in a studio apartment. It's true what people say, "You don't know someone till you live with them." Putting aside all the annoying habits they each had, living together had been wonderful. Bella loved cuddling with Edward, talking till the early hours of the morning, and then waking up in his arms.

That first night they spent together was beautiful. Edward was so loving; he took his time worshiping her body. He murmured how beautiful she was, how much he loved her as feather light kisses and soft sensual touches adorned every inch of her body. The moment he entered her—the emotions that washed through her body—making love with Edward was beyond words. Of course it hurt, but nothing like the horror stories she heard from Tanya and her high school friends. After the initial sting, it was like her body fit him perfectly. Their bodies rocked together in perfect harmony.

After that night, the pair was insatiable. They couldn't get enough of each other: in the shower, on the kitchenette counter, over the arm of the sofa, in the car. This was the best part about living together; they didn't have to hide, there were no time restraints, no holding back.

.

.

.

Bella was hired at the local school district, as a substitute teacher's aide, thanks to her mother, Renee. It was a part-time job, three hours a day, and was enough to provide Bella with spending money and not mooch off Edward. Edward continued his job as a busboy. The only down fall to Edward's job was his work hours, four to midnight. Bella hated being alone at night, and hated Edward driving home alone that late even more.

Things with her parents had gotten better. Charlie was still upset she had moved out, but he was dealing with it. Every time Bella went over to visit, she would catch her father looking her over, and then he would ask, "Everything okay, he treating you good?"

One day, she arrived at her parents' house with a swollen lip. Charlie damn near came out of his skin, his eyeballs bulged in their sockets the moment he saw her. It took Bella almost an hour to calm her father down enough to explain to him she had an allergic reaction to something she had eaten. Showing him her prescription had been the only thing to truly settle him down.

"You'd tell me if he laid a hand on you, right Bells?" Charlie asked her.

"Dad, come on. It's Edward you're talking about." Bella sighed as she sat on down on the couch. "He would never hit me." She looked at him and shook her head.

"But if he did—"Charlie continued.

"Stop," Bella demanded. "Stop trying to look for trouble where there is none. Stop trying to make him out to be the bad guy."

"I'll see you guys later," she said as she stood up.

"What…why? You just got here," Renee said as she walked out of the kitchen.

"I know mama, I just came to say hi. Edward's next door picking up a few things. I'm gonna go see if he needs help." Bella kissed her mother on the cheek.

"Charles, what'd you do?" Renee questioned her husband.

"What? I didn't do anything," he looked at her innocently.

.

.

Bella could hear shouting coming from the direction of Edward's old bedroom as she walked into the kitchen of his mother's home.

"What the fuck you want me to do, Ma" Edward shouted. "Stop talking to my dad, remove him from my life completely?" he questioned.

"It's just like you to be okay with this. I can't fucking believe it," Elizabeth roared. "He abandoned us Edward. He fucking walked away and left us like dogs, all for that whore. Everything that belonged to us, she has now. And now she's pregnant? That bastard kid of theirs will get everything that's rightfully yours and your brothers." Elizabeth's voice echoed throughout the house.

Bella stood there stunned. She had no idea Carlisle and his wife, Nelly, were expecting a child. How long had Edward known?

"God you're a fucking idiot, Edward, you've always been a daddy's boy." Elizabeth sneered. "You look just like the bastard—it's disgusting—I can't stand to even look at you."

Bella leaned against the wall and covered her mouth with her hand, trying to stifle her sob. She knew Elizabeth had been a neglectful mother, but, never to the point of verbal abuse. That was something Edward and his brothers kept under wraps. If she wouldn't have heard it with her own ears, Bella would have never imagined that this was the kind of life Edward and his brother's had to endure.

The door to the bedroom opened up and Bella ran to the kitchen door as she wiped at her tears, and prayed that she wouldn't get caught eavesdropping. A confrontation with Elizabeth, or for Edward to be embarrassed for her overhearing, was the last thing Bella wanted.

"Yeah, well the feelings mutual. Good thing you don't have to look at me every day anymore,"Edward stated. His voice sounded so defeated. Anyone listening could tell Edward was reining in his emotions, desperately trying not to break down. Bella couldn't stand the way Elizabeth affected Edward. How could a mother treat her children this way, be so cruel? Didn't she see the impact her actions—words have on them?

"Ah yes, I forgot you're playing house with the little Swan." Elizabeth laughed humorlessly. "How's that going for you Eddie, you calling up Daddy for some pointers?"

Bella's feet were glued to the floor, her hand stuck on the doorknob. She willed her body to move, to not get caught, but she was frozen in place. Her anger bubbled to the surface and hot angry tears streamed down her face. How fucking dare she mock Edward or their relationship?

"Bella, what are you doing here?" Edward called out, the surprises of her being there...listening...was clear in his words.

"I'm sorry," Bella turned around and pleaded with her eyes. "I…I didn't mean to listen. I came to see if you needed help."

"Why Eddie, is your Swan too good to step foot in this house?" Elizabeth snarled as she stepped around Edward to face Bella, giving her an icy, spine chilling glare.

"You leave her out of this," Edward hissed as he reached for Bella's hand and pulling her behind him.

"Wait outside for me, Bella. I just need to get something from the living room," Edward directed, speaking to her from over his shoulder.

"What? You aren't taking anything from this house," Elizabeth screeched as she followed Edward into the living room. "This is my house, what's in here is my property."

"This is my property. Bella bought this for me, and I'm taking it." Edward barked, as he moved around the living room, gathering what little belongings he had left behind.

"Bella…Bella…Bella, you sound like a little bitch," Elizabeth bellowed. "Just get the fuck out! Get your shit and leave," she screamed as Edward walked out the back door.

Edwards's body sagged in defeat, his eyebrows are deep in thought, Bella knew Elizabeth's words hurt Edward; she would soon find out just how deep they had cut.

*FFY*

* * *

**A/N**

**Thank you all for stickin' with me, see ya'll next time :)**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. **

**I love to hear your thoughts :)**

* * *

**New Contest - Coming Soon!**

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**Search under author - Dark and Twisted Contest**


	27. Chapter 27

Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.

Thank you to my amazing team, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.

_*Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!*_

Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!

* * *

_Chapter Twenty-Six:_

_May 26, 2013_

"I need help. I need help," Edward repeats over and over as he stares out his bedroom window. Too ashamed to look his brother in the eye, he whispers his confession into the darkness.

Internally there's a war going on. A part of him understands the words that just came out of his mouth; it made perfect sense to seek help, get clean and pray for a future with his son. But, that part of him—the side that craves the next high, that keeps his mind flooded with images of partying with friends. The part of him that every so often allows him to remember what his body feels like when he's high, the taste of his pipe at the tip of his tongue, how his mouth waters at the thought . The part of him that needs the power, the invincibility, the strength to say 'I don't give a fuck' when in all reality that's the one thing he does—he gives a fuck—and that's the sole reason he continues to get high, seek comfort in the sensations the drug gives him.

But...it's an easy fix. One that fades away, Edward thought to himself. It never lasts. He always has to come back for more. Otherwise, all the reasons he's getting high in the first place come crashing down.

It's a never ending circle, and he's just so tired. Tired of hurting, tired of pushing down his troubles— ignoring them, hoping that they'll go away. It doesn't work that way does it? No, eventually they rise and overtake, suffocating to the point where the only way out is to give in. The pull becomes too great, and all that's left is to surrender life, family, a future for the painless emptiness of oblivion.

Is this the person Edward wants to be? Someone who fades away and eventually no one will remember. His family will go on with their lives. He can't expect them to put up with his destructive behavior, forever. Everyone has a breaking point, a point where they say enough is enough and walk away. It's the easier of the two options—stay and watch a loved one slowly kill himself, or leave.

There's an old Spanish saying that his nanny, Elena, use to always say _"Ojos que no ven, corazón que no siente."_

At the time, Edward didn't understand the true meaning behind her words. Now, it was something he told himself every day—_Out of sight out of mind, what I don't see doesn't hurt me._ Edward figured if he didn't see the pain he had caused—by walking away from Bella & his child it wouldn't affect him.

Boy was he ever wrong.

Although she was hired to care for the Cullen boys, Elena never treated them as if they were anything less than the light of her life. Her loving affection was genuine and boundless. In Edward's mind and heart—Elena was his mother, she had been there, always. There isn't a memory of his childhood that Elena isn't in. She bathed, fed, cleaned and washed for them. She's the one who woke them up for school, was there when he and his brothers got home. Dinner made with a smile, always a smile. _"Mis Ninos,"_ she would coo at them as they walked in the door._ "Duerman con los angeles mis amores," _she would say as she tucked them in and kissed them goodnight.

When Jasper, Edwards's youngest brother, was a baby, he would sleep with Elena. Most nights, he would cry for her until she came and took him into her room.

Thinking back now, Edward can see where his mother had abandoned them all those years ago, allowing Elena to take her place so easily. All of Elizabeth's complaints about Edward's father: he works too much, he's never home, he never spends family time with them. Didn't she realize she was doing the same thing? How could his parents be so withdrawn and allow someone to replace them so easily? Didn't they love Edward and his brothers?

Wait…but isn't that exactly what he's doing? He walked away from his unborn—his responsibility—a child he should love and want to protect, cherish.

"Fuck, I'm just like them," Edward mumbles as he tugs at his hair.

He's startled by a knock on his door.

"Yeah?" he calls out.

"I called Dad, asked if he can meet us somewhere to talk," Emmett says as he walks back into the room.

"Yeah. Thanks, Em."

Walking over and sitting down next to his brother, Emmett places a hand on Edward's back.

"Happy Birthday, bro, I know you don't like to make a show of your birthday, which is why I hadn't said anything." Edward looks up at Emmett, nodding in understanding.

"But with all that's happened… I want to let you know that I'm very proud of you for taking this step. For manning up."

Edwards's throat tightens with his brother's words. Emmett has always been there, no matter what. He became their protector after their father left, and Elizabeth ordered Elena out of their home. Emmett filled the role of parent when Elizabeth slipped away to a life of partying and drugs. Emmett stepped up and picked up the pieces, making sure his younger brothers had food to eat and clothes on their back.

"Thanks, Em," Edward mumbles.

"I love you, bro. I'll always be here, whatever you need, no matter what," Emmett says as he stands up.

"Come on, get your ass up and give your big bro a hug." Edwards shakes his head and laughs as he stands up and embraces his brother in the tightest hug they've ever given each other.

"I love you too, Em. I'm sorry for all—"

Hugging Edward a little tighter, cutting off his apology, Emmett nods. "I know…I know."

"Mama Esme is coming for us, so make sure you have everything you need, 'cause you won't be coming back."

Mama Esme and Rose had plans to take Edward and his brothers out to dinner for his birthday. With the day's recent events, Emmett called her and filled her in with what had happened. They were still all going to dinner, only Carlisle was now attending with them.

Mama Esme always remained civil with her ex-son-in-law; he was the father to her grandbabies and by default, will always be a part of her life. She wasn't like her daughter; Mama Esme knew how to be civil, that's not to say she didn't give Carlisle a piece of her mind. Mama was never one to hold her tongue. She just knew when and where to pick her battles.

That's the one thing Carlisle loved about her, she has always remained the same. Since the first day he met her—"she's quick, never misses a beat," he would say, "But ya gotta love'er."

"I have everything I need," Edward answers Emmett as he picks up his duffel bag.

"Um…Em…you think…" Edward clears his throat. Emmett notices Edward clutching an envelope tightly in his hands.

"You think you can give this to Bella for me?" He holds out his hand with the envelope. "I would have said it all in person, if I thought she would let me." Edward shakes his head.

"It's just easier this way, I don't wanna see the disappointment in her eyes."

"Yeah, sure, I'll make sure she gets it as soon as I get back."

"Thanks."

Hearing a car pull up in their drive, Emmett says, "That's probably Mama."

Saying goodbye to his family was hard for Edward. He knew it wasn't a goodbye forever, that they would eventually visit, but, he'd never been apart from his brothers for long periods of time. Bella was a different story. She wasn't a part of his life and maybe never would be again. Edward had no one to blame but himself. He tried not to think about all the pain he had caused her; the drugs had always succeeded in keeping reality at bay. Now that he was finally thinking somewhat clearly, he knew he would miss her the most...he had no right, though. He knew that. Bella was absent from his life because of the choices _he_ had made.

Having Bella living next door—even though he didn't have much contact with her this—was a sense of comfort for Edward. He would see her moving around in her room from time-to-time. Hearing her talking in her backyard all brought comfort to him. Being able to see Bella with his own eyes, to hear her and know she was okay was how he kept her close. It was, in his mind a way to keep her in his life.

Sitting in the car with his dad, Edward looks out the window and lets his mind wander. What would she think when Emmett hands her his letter? Will she even take it, read it? He wouldn't be surprised if she rejected it altogether. But God, how he prayed that she would take it, read it. It said everything he wished he had the courage to say to her.

He scribbled down everything she meant to him on the pages. He wrote of how sorry he was for treating her so badly. How much he loves her. That he was taking a step in the right direction—for her, for himself, but most importantly for their son. Edward wrote how he prayed he could repair all the damage he has caused. He begged her for a chance at a relationship with his son.

Closing his eyes, he silently prays that she reads his letter.

He prays that she forgives him.

He prays that she allows him a relationship with his son.

He prays that he's not too late to mend the shattered pieces that is their relationship.

Edward's aware that he has a long road ahead of him; nothing is going to be mended overnight. He has a lot of work to do, a lot of unresolved issues that need to be dealt with. Issues that Edward would really prefer to leave buried. But if he wants to get better, if he expects to heal, then he needs to face reality.

Carlisle breaks the silence, bringing Edward out of his thoughts. "I'm glad you called me, son. I'm proud of you for taking this step."

"Yeah," Edward mumbles as he continues to look out the window.

"Emmett told me about what happened with your mother this morning…I'm sorry about that. She had no right—"

"Dad…please, I'd rather not talk about that now."

"Okay…so…what do you want to talk about?" Carlisle asks. "Emmett said

Bella's having a boy," he smiles looking over at Edward.

"Yeah, that's what I hear," Edward answers wistfully. He can't help but smile at the thought of his son.

Turning around and closing his eyes, he begins to pray, again.

He prays for strength—strength to get through his withdrawals.

He prays for courage—courage to see his rehabilitation all the way through.

He prays for willpower —willpower to stay.

All day Bella hoped that she would be able to see Edward, to at least catch a glimpse of him if only she would be able to talk to him—_Happy Birthday...I'm sorry we're not together today, I miss you_—is what she would say.

When her cell phone rings, her heart skipped a beat, her hands began to sweat, maybe Edward was calling from Emmett's cell.

"Hello?" she answers in a shaky voice.

"Hey good lookin', whatcha got cookin'?" Emmett's voice booms on the other end.

Giggling at his silly antics, "A baby," she laughs.

"Ah, yes…how's the bun in the oven coming along, he about ready to come out?"

"So now you believe it's a he," Bella answers. "I found out at my last doctor appointment…it's gonna be a boy."

Emmett can hear the smile in Bella's voice. She had always said it was going to be a boy.

"So you were right, huh? Guess I should start believing you more often. Listen, B, you gonna be home in a bit?"

"Yeah I'm here, why, what's up?"

"Is it okay if I come over, I have something to give you."

"Em, you know you can come over anytime you want."

"Alright, see you in a few," Emmett says as he hangs up.

Walking outside to wait for Emmett on the porch, Bella wonders what he has to give her. Maybe he bought something for the baby. Maybe Edward did, and sent Emmett over with it? Little did she know that what she would get would be a gift of sorts, something she had prayed for—but never imagined she would get.

~~FFY~~

* * *

**A/N**

**Translation:**

**_Ojos que no ven, corazón que no siente_**** - heart out of sight out of mind**

**_Mis Ninos_**** - My boys**

**_Duerman con los angeles mis amores_**** - Sleep with the angels my loves**

* * *

**Thank you for sticking with me, see ya'll next time :)**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there.**

**I love to hear your thoughts :)**

* * *

**New Contest - Coming Soon!**

**'****_A Journey into the Dark & Twisted Contest_****' - more info to come, put it on alert peeps, it's gonna be awesome!**

**Search under author - Dark and Twisted Contest**

**Rec time:**

**_Saving Grace ~ by FBbroughtustogether. _**

**A colab written between a very dear friend of mine Bec Robinson and myself, it was our Contest Entry for the Happily Ever After Twific Contest, which will now be turned into a multi-chapter fic. **

**Summary reads: Edward Cullen, owner of Cullen Plantation Bed & Breakfast, is in need of a Nanny for his orphaned niece Leah Grace. Marie Isabella Swan, fresh out of the Army sets out on a journey in search of her deceased friend's family to full fill her dying wish. All is not what it seems, will fate and destiny play out its course. Can Marie Isabella be their saving grace?**

**We have also written an outtake for Saving Grace and will be submitting it to the Fandom4OK. **

**Hope ya'll enjoy the ride!**


	28. Chapter 28

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are you to my amazing team, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

_Chapter Twenty-Seven:_

May 26, 2013

After hanging up with Emmett, Bella stands in her kitchen watching and listening as the Cullens file out of the house. Bella knows Edward's there, she can feel him, but his brothers, grandmother, and father surround him like a herd protecting its most vulnerable member. Bella only catches a glance of the top of his bowed head when he slides into the car. He quickly turns his face away, as if he knew she were watching. "Happy Birthday, Edward," Bella whispers as the car drives off.

Distracting herself from the pain of not being able to throw her arms around the man she loves, on this, his special day, Bella curls up on the couch and mindlessly watches television. Eventually, falling asleep.  
Her cell phone buzzes, waking her. Emmett's text says he's outside. Scrubbing the sleep from her eyes, she opens the door.

"Hey..." Emmett looks exhausted, his eyes are dull and sad as he forces a smile.

"You...you wanna come in?"

Shaking his head, he pulls something out of his back pocket and hands it to Bella. "I promised... Edward...he made me promise to give this to you." Emmett's eyes are glassy and cannot meet those of the girl he loves like his own flesh and blood. He's torn, wanting to kick his brother's ass for being so stupid and hurting this girl who would and has done everything within her power to love him the right way, the best way. But then again, he wants to turn back time and shield his little brother, steering him down a better path and jump right to the happily ever after that they deserve. After all, hindsight is twenty-twenty. He has to do his part to make it right.

This is a start.

Bella gingerly slides the crinkled envelope from Emmett's hand. A "B" was scrawled on front in Edward's perfect penmanship. She fights back images of her worst nightmares. When she last saw him, Edward was so gone...barely a shell of who he once was. Had he...Bella can't bear to think the words much less say them out loud.

Looking up at Emmett, he somehow knows where her mind has gone. Pulling her into his mighty arms, he shushes her. "He'll be okay, B. Don't think like that. This isn't bad news, I swear."

With trembling hands Bella opens Edward's letter. The pages are tattered from Edward worrying them. Erasing, rewriting, erasing again, dog-earing the corners in his nervousness. Bella clutches the folded bundle of papers to her chest and sits on the porch swing and begins reading.

.

**Bella,**

**I don't even know how to begin this, I've erased so many times, nothing seems to come out right. Nothing I say seems good enough. Apologizing would be a good start, huh? I'm so fucking stupid. I was so fucking dumb.**

**I realize that I need help, that I can't do this anymore. **

**I know I have no right to ask anything of you, but, God I hope you read this, B. **

**Saying sorry doesn't begin to describe how I feel about the way I've treated you, hurt you. But, I guess it's a start. **

**I'm so fucking sorry, sorry for not loving you the way I promised I would. **

**I lied to you. **

**Remember the last time I said I loved you? You asked me if I loved you like grown-ups do. I knew then that I lied, that I had loved you just the way I promised I wouldn't. I'm so sorry for that.**

**I'm sorry for every single tear I caused you, baby, every single broken promise.**

**What the fuck did I do to us, Love?**

**I've been a real asshole.**

**I found out today that the baby. Is it a boy? We're gonna have a son, B! The second I heard those words, it was like I couldn't breathe. Shit got real pretty fucking fast. **

**I walked out on you, little love. Me, I did that, not you.  
When I think of all the fucked up shit I asked of you. Fuck. The way I treated you, spoke to you. I'm so sorry.**

**I put my myself before you, and when you refused to ignore my problems or excuse them, I said and did terrible, spiteful things. **

**Things I can never take back. **

**Things you didn't deserve. **

**All you've done is love me. You loved me. How could you love me after all I did? You always were more than I deserved. I'm not going to sit here and make excuses for my behavior, I don't have an excuse, really. I have a lot of shit to work out, B. **

**My family is so fucked up. My mom's a dope fiend for fucks sake. My dad's playing fucking house with his new family, with the woman whose the reason all our lives took a shit. I wonder if she ever feels bad for splitting up my family? Wonder if my dad feels bad for leaving us? **

**I see now I'm no better.**

**I'm a drug addict just like my mom, I left you and my kid just like my dad. I realize how weak I am—was—am, and how strong you are. You face everything head on. You keep going, never once giving up. I'm so fucking proud of you, baby.**

**I'm proud of you for standing up to me. For not taking my bullshit, for walking away from me , for loving yourself and our baby more, for putting yourself first.**

**You're gonna make a wonderful mother. **

**God, your family must fucking hate me, right? **

**I try to make sense of everything I did, try to rationalize, but I can't, because it doesn't make sense. Why? Why did I do this to us? To you, to the one person I promised myself I would never hurt, the one person I love? **

**God, I love you so fucking much. You're giving me a son. After all the bullshit I've put you through, you're answering prayers, fulfilling dreams that I never knew I had. Giving me what I never knew I wanted, but now can't imagine my life without—you're having my kid. What are you going to name him, love? **

**I picture him and all I see is you. I hope he has your beautiful eyes, your smile, your heart. **

**I've missed out on so much. He's not even here yet and I've let him down already. I walked away from my son, from this beautiful human being that we created out of our love. **

**I'm sorry I wasn't there to hold your hand, I can only imagine how scared you were when you found out, only to come home to me yelling and blaming you, to have me walk out on you. I don't deserve any of this, I don't deserve him, I don't deserve you…**

**I need help.**

**Emmett called my dad today and he agreed to take me in, help me get into a decent rehab facility. I don't know where I'll end up or how long I'll be gone. However long it takes for me to get healthy and be a better person, I guess.**

**I wanted to come say goodbye, to tell you all of this in person, but I was a coward, again. I just can't take the disappointment, the hurt, the sadness in your eyes. Especially when I know I'm the cause of it all. **

**I wish I could take it all away. Please believe me when I say that I would gladly take all your hurt, your sadness just to see you happy again, to see you smile one more time. I took all that away from you. I'm so fucking sorry.**

**Can I ask you a favor, love? Will you call me when he's born? If you don't that's okay, too, I understand. Please know that I do love him, I love him so fucking much, Bella. How could I not? He's you, he's me. **

**I was such a fucking asshole. I was so cold, how could I fucking do that!?**

**If you can't call me, there are some things I'd like for you to read to him, please.**

**~Son,**

**You're finally here, you've made it into this world. Your mamma has been waiting for you for a very long time. You have so many people who love you already, so many people who were waiting for your arrival. I won't be here with you, but know that I love you so very much. I have no words to express the love I have for you. Just know that you are the most important person in my life now. I haven't been a good dad to you up to this point, I haven't been much of anything really. But I'm trying son, I'm going to get better. I won't say I promise. I've broken quite a few of those lately, but I will tell you this: I will fight 'till my last breath to be a person worthy of your love, worthy to be in your life, to become someone you will be proud to call your dad.**

**I'm so sorry I won't be there to see you enter this world, to hold you for the first time, to count your toes, to kiss you. To whisper how much I love you. Just know that I will be out there somewhere thinking of you, sending my love and kisses up to the stars. Maybe your mom can walk you outside so you can get them?**

**Till we meet,**

**I love you, baby boy – Dad. ~**

**B, I'm scared. Scared I'm going to disappoint him, not be someone he'll be proud of. How do you do it, love, how do you stay so strong?**

**There's a song I want you to listen to for me, Bruno Mars' " When I was Your Man." Have you heard it before? **

**I don't know how or when I heard this song, but it keeps playing over and over in my head as if it were written about me—us. I was too young, too dumb to realize I should have treated you better. Taken you out more, showed you off. My pride, my ego, my needs, my selfish ways caused a good, strong woman like you to walk out of my life. Bella, I hope I get a chance to clean up the mess I made, but I'm probably much too late to try and apologize for my mistakes.**

**I do realize that I've more than likely lost you, that you will go on with your life. I won't lie to myself and think that you'll wait for me. You deserve to find love, to be loved, to be cherished, swept off your feet. As much as that hurts me to admit, I wish you all those things, love, and so much more. I wish I had been wise enough to be all of that for you from the start. **

**You're my B, my best friend, my soulmate, my beautiful little love. I will love you forever, I will love you always.**

**I'm so sorry,**

**Edward.**

.  
Bella silently moves to her bedroom after a mumbled goodbye to Emmett. She was thankful that he was there with her, providing comfort as she read the letter.

With Edward's tear-stained letter pressed to her chest, she cries as she lays on her bedroom floor holding Edward's words against her heart.  
"He's gone, he's gone," she whispers over and over.

Her reaction to the letter catches her off guard. This moment is the epitome of bittersweet. How long had she prayed for this, for Edward to make the decision to get clean? Her tears are happy ones. She's glad that Edward's getting help, relieved that he finally sees how he's been destroying himself and everyone else around him. But, her gut twists because this is going to hurt. He will be brought to his knees—withdrawal isn't a pretty sight nor is it something to be taken lightly. Bella has never seen anyone withdrawal from heavy drug use, but what she's heard and seen on TV, a lot of people who have attempted rehab don't succeed past the withdrawals. The pain is so excruciating that most leave and turn back to drugs.

Bella doesn't want to envision Edward in that type of pain, but, she prays with all her heart that he remains strong, strong enough to endure, and stay clean.

~~FFY~~

* * *

**A/N**

**Thank you for sticking with me, see ya'll next time :)**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. I will be posting teasers and chapter pics there.**

**I love to hear your thoughts :)**

* * *

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**Search under author - Dark and Twisted Contest**


	29. Chapter 29

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

_Chapter Twenty-Eight_

October 28, 2012

The days and weeks after Edwards's argument with his mother were full of tension and awkwardness. Bella had no idea what to say or do. She was at a loss, unable to fully comprehend why—how—a mother could speak to her child the way Elizabeth had spoken to Edward. She silently pondered if Elizabeth had gone further than verbal abuse with Edward and his brothers? Bella kept trying to remember if she had ever noticed any bruises on Edward. Had anyone else noticed anything: Mama Esme, Rose, Carlisle? Should she say something, tell her dad? Although Edward and Emmett were adults, Jasper was still at home and very much underage. Would Edward get upset with her for not minding her business?

Bella loved Edward. They were a couple after all and that's what couple's do, right? They watch out for each other. Even if they weren't a couple, they were still best friends and she would've felt the same way. So yeah, it was her business; whatever hurt Edward hurt her.

Something else bothered Bella...something Elizabeth had said. Something that Edward had not yet brought up, and Bella wasn't sure how to approach. Carlisle was going to be a father...again. Edward's reasons for keeping this news a secret were a mystery.

There were a lot of things Bella was unsure of these days. Lately, the foreign sensation of unease overwhelmed her whenever Edward was near. Edward had been the only person she was able to truly be herself with, say anything, ask anything. But, lately it had been as if she were walking on eggshells around him. His temper hadn't been the best lately. Now, she worried saying and doing the wrong thing, even looking at him sometimes would set him off and he'd leave. Which was what he had done, he'd storm out their apartment and not come back for hours.

Bella was starting to worry about Edward. Was he depressed because of everything going on with his mother and father? But, why...after all these years. Elizabeth and Carlisle had been divorced for quite a while, and neither adult had been very present in Edwards life. Maybe he had finally snapped, she thought. The pressure from bottling everything up for so long was bound to burst. Then Bella overheard the altercation with Elizabeth. She speculated it was probably too much for Edward to handle; he couldn't hide Elizabeth's abuse any more—he couldn't continue to act like everything was fine.

Was he embarrassed that she had heard them? Maybe he was and that's was why he wasn't home much anymore. When he was home he couldn't stay still. His eyes would dart around their studio apartment as if he were desperately looking for something. On more than one occasion Bella had come home to find Edward had rearranged their furniture, only to put it back to its original state days later.

Edward was getting in from work later and later. He hadn't been sleeping much anymore either. Concern was putting it lightly, Bella had begun to panic. What the hell was going on with Edward? Was he having a mental breakdown? What else could possibly explain his behavior? Like most complex problems, the answer was simple, obvious, yet elusive.

.  
"What? You've gotta be fucking kidding me," Edward hissed.

_"Watch it, Edward," Carlisle scolded._

"It's a little too late for discipline, Dad." Edward rolled his eyes as he barked out an annoyed laugh. "That ship sailed when you chose to leave us."

_"How long are you going to hold that against me, huh," Carlisle asked as he sighed heavily into the phone receiver._

"Whatever…"

_"Edward, listen…I'm happy with Nelly. We're having a baby, your baby brother—"_

"God, this is fucking ridiculous." Edward laughed humorlessly. "Really, do you really want to talk about that with me? I already have a baby brother, Jasper's his name. I think you know him?" Edward said sarcastically.

_"Fine…I'm trying here, son. I'm trying to have a relationship with you and your brothers. Involve you three in my life, my family. Nelly wishes you guys came around more often, and hopefully have a relationship with the baby. That's why I called…" Carlisle paused, hoping his middle son would give him something...anything more than the pained snark Edward was dispensing. Instead he was met with silence._

_"It would make Nelly very happy if you and your brothers stood by me in the wedding, please think about it?" he continued._

"What's there to think about? You really think I'm gonna stand up in a church...and what, give my blessing…why?" How could Carlisle have asked that of him? Did he honestly think Edward would be able to stand by him, give his blessing to start a new family, while Edward's family had been ruined because of this relationship?

Carlisle built a shiny new life on the crumbled pieces of his first marriage—his first family.

After the call with his father ended, Edward's body trembled as it broke out in a cold sweat, his mouth went dry only to fill up with saliva as nausea overtook him. Resting his head on the back of the sofa, Edward replayed everything his father had said.

"Fucking bastard," Edward whispered, as he yanked on handfuls of his hair. Carlisle had been so happy when he announced Nelly was pregnant. To Edward it was as if Carlisle and Nelly were laughing in his face—spitting on the memories of his family.

_"This is a new start for me. I can right all the wrongs I did with you and your brothers," _Carlisle had said. "_I know I messed up alot with you boys. I wasn't there like I should have been…I'm getting a second chance now, this is truly a blessing."_

Edward was speechless. His stomach clenched as if his father had punched him in the gut. What the fuck was Carlisle saying? That Edward and his brothers were a trial run? That they didn't mean as much as this new baby?

Opening his eyes, Edward looked at the clock, Bella wasn't due home from work for another two hours. That gave him plenty of time.

"Just one hit, just to take the edge off," Edward reasoned with himself, he thought he had it all under control, he thought he was fooling everybody. But, he couldn't manage his emotions without it, not with this life-altering news his father just dropped on him.

He clenched and unclenched his trembling hand as he reached into his pocket, and pulled out a coin purse. He removed its contents and laid them out on the coffee table in front of him.

There was something definitely wrong with Edward, but, nothing remotely close to what Bella had thought.

Crystal Meth.

That's what was wrong with him.

The first time Edward used, was at work. He had walked in on two of his co-workers in the restroom one day smoking something out of a glass pipe.

"Sorry man…I'll just come back," Edward apologized as he made his way back out the door.

"No worries bro—" one of them answered. "You wanna hit?"

"Nah, I'm good, thanks." Edward waved a hand in refusal. He knew exactly what they were smoking, he had become very familiar with it.  
Elizabeth, Edward's mother was a meth addict, had been for years. Edward had always promised himself that he would never use meth, he refused be like his mother.

"Ah…come on, you look like you could use a little pick me up. This shit is pretty fucking good. It'll have you going and going for days. Come on, take a hit. What's the worst that can happen?"

Well…something did happen. After the bombshell Carlisle dropped—the announcement of the baby—and Edward's fight with his mother something snapped in Edward which had him going to his co-worker to buy some meth. It started small, a hit here and there for fun, only to come back to it every time he had an unpleasant conversation with his father...his mother...every time he wanted to forget.

.  
_January 31, 2013_

Life for Bella had not been easy the last few months—she was miserable. Her relationship with Edward had slowly fallen apart. They hardly talked because he was never home, too busy out with his co-workers. At one point Bella had wondered if Edward was cheating on her with someone from work. He spent all his time with his c_o-workers_ as he called them—not friends, not buddies, not even associates. He was so detached and secretive about this relationship. Bella couldn't confirm or deny who he was with. He never allowed her to come along or meet any of them for that matter.

Cleaning their apartment, Bella gathered all the dirty clothes, emptying pant pockets before loading the washing machine. Bella blindly tossed the pocket treasures into an empty basket, only to hear something clank loudly. As she looked back into the basket, she noticed a weird baby blue and pink beaded coin purse. It was odd, since when did Edward carry a coin purse...but...the sound she heard weren't coins clinking together. She took out the small bag, curious as to what was inside, and unzipped it.

Her heart sank at the sight before her, as a broken piece of glass and lighter rolled near her hip. She had seen this before, Edward had showed her once, told her what it was—what his mother used it for.

Desperately trying to shove it all back in the bag and not wanting to touch it.

Thoughts of what this meant bombarded her mind.

Was this why he acted so weird, so distant, and closed off?

This couldn't be right? He loathed anyone who did this.

He promised he wouldn't, he promised he would never be like _her._

Tears spilled down Bella's cheeks, her stomach twisted with nausea, how could she have not recognize the signs, how could she have not seen exactly who she was living with?

Jumping off the bed, she ran into the bathroom, as thought after thought ran ramped through her head.

How many times had she kissed Edward after he had his mouth on that burned up broken piece of glass?

How many times had he come home to make love to her and he was high?

Sobbing as she dry heaved, her body willed itself to expel the vile reality of what she found because no food had touched her stomach that day.

What was she going to do?

How could he do this to himself, to her?

Why—why would he do this?

Shaking uncontrollably as she moved to stand, she braced herself on the sink. After washing her face with trembling hands, she returned the cloth to its proper place, and then noticed a box sitting on the back of the toilet.  
Walking out the bathroom, she picked up her phone and looked at the date.

"No…no...Dear God…please," Bella begged.

Her period was due on the twenty-ninth, she was two days late. Bella was never late.

.  
Four days had passed and Bella had not confronted Edward, he continued to stay out late, and slept long after she had left for school and work.

She had not gotten her period either.

Bella made an appointment to get a pregnancy test done, worried that a home pregnancy kit would not be accurate this early. She wanted that peace of mind. She told herself that, no matter what the results were, she would confront Edward about everything.

"Well my dear, you are definitely pregnant," the nurse told her. "What was the date of your last period?"

Bella stared at the nurse as she let the words seep in.

"Honey, are you okay? How old are you?"

"Eight…eighteen. Yes, yes I'm sorry, I'm fine. Just a little shocked is all," Bella stated.

Shocked? She was panicked. The only thing that kept her from vomiting on the doctor's floor was the embarrassment she would cause herself.

As she left the doctor's office, Bella couldn't help but be worried about what Edward would think, how he would react.

She had waited up for him that night, not that she was able to sleep anyway. But the reaction she received was far worse than she expected.

"What?" Edward looked at her confused. "What the fuck…" He stood from the sofa and paced the area in their kitchen.

"Did you do this on purpose?" he accused her. "What the fuck, Bella? I thought you were on the pill!" he snapped angrily as he slammed his hand down on the kitchen counter.

Bella jumped at his outburst. Edward had never been this angry with her before, unrecognizable in his fury. In fact, Bella, didn't recognize the person standing in front of her at all, his lips were white and chafed, his skin was clammy—thin and grayed. He clawed at his skin and hair. Edward's eyes bounced across the apartment, never once looking directly at her.

Acting completely manic in that moment. Fear, shock—terror. He's not himself, Bella thought as she tried to calm her nerves. But, she was offended and hurt, and ready to fight to defend herself.

"Why the hell would I do that, Edward?" Bella answered bitterly. "You really think I want to have a baby with a fucking meth addict!" Her eyes widened in shock as the words tumbled out of her mouth. She had not meant to start their conversation about his drug abuse in this way.

Edward's face turned ten shades of red at her words, he looked purple as fury inched slowly across his face. His shoulders tensed as he gripped the counter.

"What the fuck did you just say?" Edward growled through clenched teeth.

"I know all about it, Edward." Bella's shoulders sagged. "Don't deny it, I saw your pipe. You forgot to take your baggie out of your pants the other night."

"And what, you're going through my shit now?"

"NO! I was washing your shit, that's what I was doing!"

"How could you? You promised yourself you'd never do that," Bella mumbled through her tears. "You said you'd never be like her."

"I'm nothing like my mother," Edward sneered. "Don't…don't fucking go there." He pointed a finger in her direction.

"So…what the fuck you gonna do now, huh? I'm not ready to have a kid. I don't even know what I want to do with my life." Edward stared at Bella. His expression blank, void of any emotion at all.

"What do you mean, what am I gonna do?" Bella asked shocked. Was he really doing this?

"I don't want a fucking kid, B." Edward pushed himself away from the counter. "Make an appointment—get rid of it," he said as he walked around to his bedside table and grabbed his keys.

Bella's breath got caught in her throat at his words. How…how, could he say that? Tears ran down her face as she watched him head toward the door. She realized, for the first time, that he was just like his mother. The boy she loved, the boy who ached and cried for his mother's attention. The boy whom she cried for and comforted because he was chewed out and spit on by his mother, was no longer there. What stood across from her, turning his back on her, was not her Edward. She didn't know who or what this was she was looking at.

He gripped the doorknob and spoke quietly, "I'm not renewing the lease at the end of next month, so you need to figure out what you're gonna do." He stared at the door, refusing to look back at her.

He waited for her to respond, but when nothing came he continued, "I'll ask Mama Esme or Aunt Rose to borrow one of their trucks. I'll move you back to your mom and dad's."

As he closed the door, Bella sunk to her knees and cried.

He had walked out.

He didn't want her anymore.

She had lost her love.

She had lost her best friend.

~~FFY~~

* * *

**A/N**

**OMG, ya'll, 'Fool for You' is up for fic of the week on The Lemonade Stand! I was floored, and am super excited and honored just to be included in the poll. There are some spectacular fic's on the poll this week. **

**If ya haven't voted yet, please go cast your vote! www dot tehlemonadestand dot net**

**Thank you for sticking with me, see ya'll next time :)**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners. **

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	30. Chapter 30

**Disclaimer~ I don't own anything Twilight related or anything else here that might be thought to be copyright infringement. The original characters, content and ideas of this story are mine.**

**Thank you to my amazing team, Daphodill, Shenaniwhatagans and Little Miss Norty, for taking the time in helping me make this pretty for you all.**

_***Warning...My characters have a lot of issues that they will go through, there will be underage drug use and drinking. It's a true love story, although the names are different and there are character shifts, a lot of the situations have happened. With that said, I hope you stick around, see ya on the other side!***_

_Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you truly make my day! I love you all!_

* * *

_Chapter 29_

_February 4, 2013_

The days after Bella told Edward she was pregnant were a blur. Fragments of time played behind her lids whenever she closed her eyes. She was a girl so lost…so sad. The memories…visions…flashes of shattered moments replayed crackled and scratchy like an old black and white movie.

Time lacked much significance since Edward walked out on her.

She was alone; Edward came and went, but really was never around anymore. Bella had no idea where he was or who he was with.

It was so hard for her to sleep in the bed…his bed…their bed; a place that stored all his whispered words of love and countless memories of lovemaking and laughter. The bed mocked her with memories of Edward's sweet words promising heaven and earth for a smile. Everything he said—was a lie. Bella refused to lie on the bed again, a place where she had given Edward every last shred of herself.

He took all that she offered. Bella's love was rewarded with deception.

On those rare occasions when Edward did come home Bella would wake up to him sitting beside her on the sofa, kissing her lips. Her heart would pound so loud in her ears as hope blossomed. Had he realized he was wrong? Did he come back to her for good this time?

Who was she fooling?

No one but herself; _I'm such an idiot_, Bella would say to herself.

She walked around with her heart in her throat, ready at any given moment to expel it. It was a useless muscle now, and she was desperate to be rid of it. Why? Why did she hurt so much? Why did she allow him to hurt her? How could she have given him so much power?

Power... that is exactly what Edward had. He had the power to break Bella into a million pieces. He expertly and mercilessly wielded his hammer and she shattered. Would he one day piece her back together? Bella knew he could; tenderness and patience was still there. He showed it in fleeting moments.

Bella had always promised herself that she would never be like the woman who had presently been wallowing on her sofa. No. Bella had been confident just a few days ago. She hardly recognized herself anymore; her thoughts were heartbroken and desperate.

From a young age, Bella believed that that she would stand on her own and be strong, that she would never become dependent on a man. She promised herself that she would never lose herself, that she would never get so deep where she didn't know who she was without him.

Foolish words, really.

As Bella stared at the strange girl in the mirror, thought after thought invaded her mind...The face in the mirror twisted with disgust— disgust over what she had become.

She was broken.

She was lost.

She was dependent.

She was so in love it literally hurt.

Love was breaking her.

She didn't know who she was anymore.

She blamed herself.

A symphony of 'ifs' roll around in her head.

_If only she had seen the signs sooner._

_If only she had been more careful._

_If only…_

_If only…_

.

.

.

Bella had avoided her family for as long as she could.

After a few days, her mother called wondering why she hadn't come around lately. She lied, of course. "I've been working a lot, getting in pretty late. I'll be by soon."

As was the case with most parents, Bella's mother was one-step ahead of her. She saw right through Bella's bullshit, better yet, she had been informed of Bella's bullshit.

"_Why is Edward's mother knocking on my door congratulating me on being a grandmother?"_

How? Why? Why in the hell would Elizabeth do that? Why in the hell would Edward do that to her?

Renee's fury rattled the phone as she spoke._ "Do you have any idea what that feels like, Bella? I can't stand that woman and I have her knocking on my door telling me my daughter is pregnant. Something I should have heard from you!"_

Bella was rendered speechless.

_"Is it true,"_ Renee cried.

How much pain was this fucked up situation she found herself in going to inflict? When would it stop hurting?

"Yes, it's true," Bella gasped. "I'm sorry Mama, I'm so sorry."

Before their conversation ended Renee asked the one question Bella was hoping she wouldn't._ "Why is Edward next door? He's been there the last few days. What's going on?"_

Her father called the next day, a conversation she dreaded.

Charlie didn't try and mask the disappointment in his voice; Bella didn't need to be in front of him to see the hurt and sadness in his eyes.

_"Just come home,"_ he begged.

He knew.

He didn't have to say anything else. Him asking Bella to come home meant that he knew things weren't good for her.

_"Me and your mama…we'll help you. Things will be okay. Just come home, baby girl."_

So, that's what she did.

True to his word, Edward packed Bella up and moved her back home.

Bella couldn't look Edward in the eye that day. She doesn't even know how she managed to make it through the day without clawing at Edward, pleading for him to not destroy them. Instead, they moved silently around one another. The quiet spread like an insurmountable chasm. Bella took a step toward the ledge. Her mouth formed questions that fell into the deep, ceaseless silence. She used to love it, just listening to him breathe, the steady beat of his heart. It meant he was there, with her. Now, she was desperate to capture the rasps and thumps and keep them forever.

He never said a word. She never felt his eyes upon her as they moved around their tiny apartment. Bella stood wordlessly, watching Edward load the last box into the back of the truck. His long legs carried him past her; he was so close she could feel his warmth. She wanted him to look at her, but he kept his head down as he pulled the passenger door open for her.

It was really over. He didn't want her.

The next thing she knew, they were pulling up in the Swan driveway.

.

.

.

_July 26, 2013_

Five months...

Five months had passed since Edward broke Bella's heart and walked out on her.

Two months…

It had been two months since Bella last caught a glimpse of him. Two months since she received his letter.

Tattered.

Worn.

Folds permanently scarring the paper.

Two months since Edward admitted that he needed help.

Bella missed him so much. The dry ache in her throat, the hollow yearn in her stomach, the automatic tightening of her muscles had become commonplace since Edward deposited Bella on her parents' doorstep many months ago, and had become easy to ignore with each passing day.

Ignoring the pain and emptiness was harder now; the feelings grew stronger, doubled with every passing day. Bella knew Edward was away, healing, getting clean. Why then was it so hard for her? This is what she wanted, what she'd hoped for.

.

.

.

As if being seven months pregnant wasn't hard enough, the constant discord was extremely trying. Bella felt as if she were torn into three pieces―one: giving into her heart, looking past the hurt, the tears, the angry words, the horrible behavior. Forgiving Edward because she knew his heart, she knew the person he truly was—the boy she fell in love with, the boy who loved her back.

Two: knowing in her head, realistically, that the boy she love had changed. That she deserved better, that her parents were right to demand better for her.

Three: She was a mother, and she had to love her son enough to put her heart aside and do right by him. She had to love her son enough to protect him, love her son enough to _demand_ better for him.

Bella was so torn.

She was exhausted and didn't want to think. Bella didn't want to feel, she only wanted to be loved. She wanted that so bad. She needed to be hugged. Bella ached…yearned for words of encouragement whispered in her ear. She wanted all of this from the one person who couldn't give them.

Why?

Why did he do it? How could he do it? How could he choose his addiction over Bella? Over their friendship…their love? She asked herself these questions every day.

What would she tell her son? If Edward never got his act together, what would she say? What excuse could she give? Bella wondered if she would lie for him, would she be able to look her son in his eyes and tell him the truth—that his dad was sick? How could she begin to explain to her child that his father was a drug addict when she didn't understand it herself?

What would she say?

Her parents were very supportive…to a degree. If it weren't for them taking her back in, she didn't know what she would have done. For that, she will be always grateful. On the other hand, every time Edward came around or his name was mentioned, the bashing would begin.

_"You don't need him."_

_"He was never good enough for you."_

_"The baby is better off without him."_

_"Your father could be the baby's father figure, he won't need anyone else."_

_"Look at Elizabeth, is that the kind of family you would want to raise a child in?"_

_"Edward's a selfish bastard. If he doesn't care now, he'll never care once the baby's here."_

Bella was already getting a taste of what it was to be alone, a single parent, and it sucked. The months leading up to Anthony's birth, were the hardest for her.

Trying to be level headed and keep her emotions in check, Bella struggled to not get her hopes up. She had heard his empty promises before.

What was so different this time?

Nothing.

Nothing was different, only this time she had a choice: believe in him or not?

She was torn.

How does she look past the hurt, the tears, the angry words, and the horrible behavior? He was reckless. How does she erase those images of him?

He didn't care, that was the only logical explanation.

Bella wanted to be like him, turn off her emotions, look him in the eye and tell him to go to hell and mean it. She wanted to stay strong, back up her words, and not let him back in.

How could she do that?

How could she tell her heart to forget him?

How could she not turn back and keep looking ahead?

How could she forget him when she carried a reminder of him, a living breathing reminder of him in her womb?

How could she not hate him? He's given her so many reasons.

He walked away.

He didn't give a fuck

He was selfish.

~~FFY~~

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**A/N**

**So... Its been a while and I do apologize. Life's been crazy... Work, school, four kids and sports doesn't leave much time for writing, but I do thank you for sticking with me, see ya'll next time :)**

**I have a group on FB, It's CaliGirlMon's FanFiction/Banners.**

**I love to hear your thoughts :)**

* * *

**New Contest!**

**'A Journey into the Dark & Twisted Contest' - put it on alert peeps, it's gonna be awesome!**

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